Junkhead

Nod Out

Layne woke up to his body aching.  His flesh literally felt like it was rotting.  Sitting up in his bed, he glanced down at Nicky.  He wiped his forehead that was seeping with sweat.  Gulping down his nerves, his shaky hand slowly opened the trap on the side of his nightstand.  Didn't have H, but he had some morphine patches Mike had given to him before they left the day Jerry & Nicky caught him in the act.

He tugged one out & sucked out the substance, eyes wandering back at Nicky.  He knew she would be pissed if she found out he had back-up.  He couldn't help it, though...the pain from opiate withdrawal is miserable.  Jerry & her had to go out and buy him heating pads & gastrointestinal medicine.  He grimaced, thinking of when he woke up doubling over in pain the other day, accidentally shitting his pants.

"Layne," Nicky moaned.  She rolled over, eyes wide when she noticed him sucking on the patch.  "What the fuck are you doing?!"

He sighed & sucked the rest of the patch's substance out.  He shakily tossed it into the bin, his eyes glued to her.  "Back up..."

She groaned, sitting up on the bed.  "What the fuck am I gonna do with you?"

Layne rolled his eyes.  "You had back-up when you were coming off ice."

"Pssssh...all I had was one fucking adderall," she eyed the pile of morphine patches in Layne's nightstand.  "Not an entire fucking stash.  How much did all that shit cost?!"

He smirked, shrugging.  "Not much."

"Maybe not for your every day rockstar junkie, no..."

Layne wrapped his arms around her.  "It'll be okay."

She tugged his arms off of her & got up from the bed.  "No it fucking won't.  I got off ice for you, why can't you do the same for me and get off the damn opiates?!"

He reached over and grabbed another patch, peeling it open & licking up the sticky goo.  "Well, I'm not all emaciated and homeless from it."

"If you were poor like any other doper, you would be."  She groaned & decided to grab a patch of her own.

"Hey!  That's my shit," Layne whined, reaching his hand out to her.

She slapped his arm away from her.  She raised a brow at him.  "I should go out and buy some fucking addys if you're gonna continue to do this shit."

Layne sighed & lied back down on his back, scratching an itch on his shoulder.  "Heroin at least doesn't make you fucking nuts..."

Nicky forced a laugh.  "Are you serious right now?!"

He nodded.  Those blue eyes watched her as she grabbed all of the empty patches & tossed them into the trash bin.  She disappeared into the bathroom, making Layne rest his ear against it to make sure she wasn't throwing up.

"Don't even try," she called out from the crack of the door.

"Try what?!"

"To stop me.  If you're going to continue to kill yourself, I'm going to continue my shit, too," she growled.

Layne grimaced when he heard the dry-retching.  He tried to turn the knob to open the door but she had it locked.  "Nicky, don't do this..."

"Don't continue your suicide and I'll stop mine."

Layne sighed, eyes back on his night stand.  "What are we gonna do with the patches?"

The door opened, Nicky waltzing back to the bed.  She flopped down on it.  "We could sell em."

Layne snorted back a laugh.  "I'm not going to prison, thank you..."

"I'll give em to Jer," she spat, piling the patches into her arms.

Layne jolted over to her, shaking his head at her.  "Don't do that, he'll toss them out," he pleaded.

She rolled her eyes at him.  "Do you want another dead girlfriend, or do you want to continue to kill yourself with drugs?"

"This isn't fair..." he whimpered, brows creased with anxiety.

She rolled her eyes.  "What isn't fair is that Jer still puts up with our junkie shit.  Even though he's stated a numerous amount of times that if we relapsed, he would kick us out."

Layne smirked.  "Jer would never kick us out."

She gave him a pointed look.  "I know.  You're fucking using him.  It's disgusting."

Layne shrugged.  "Everyone uses me, so I consider it fair."

"Nothing about this is fair, Layne.  You're being a pompous prick."  She opened the door to their bedroom, starting down the stairs with his batch of morphine.

Layne followed her.  "What the fuck are you gonna do with that?  That's mine."

"It's not anymore," she growled, knocking on Jerry's bedroom door.

Jerry opened it, a blank expression overcoming his face as he looked at the pile of morphine patches in her arms.  He sighed.  "Just drop them on my bed, I'll do something with them."

"It's good to know you're still a good friend," she commented.  She placed them on the mattress, glaring pointedly at Layne.  "Even though you've been LIED TO so many times."

Layne rolled his eyes.  "Come on, don't be like that..."

The both of them glared at him.

He shrugged.  "What?!  So, I fucked up, k?  Shit like this happens when you're an addict."

"Way too often when you're a Layne Staley," Nicky scoffed, tapping out of Jerry's room.  She ignored him when he tried to hold her.  "You're fucking ridiculous.  Sometimes I wonder why I'm still with you."

"Babe..." he sighed, biting his lip.  His red eyes watered.  "Come on..."

"Do you have any idea how pissed off everyone is?" She asked.  She rolled her eyes and slumped into the living room, lighting up a cig.  "Especially your mother."

"My mom knows?!" He shrieked.

"Fucking DUH."

"You told her?!"

She nodded her head.

"WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU TELL HER?!" Layne screamed. His skin burned crimson. Those blue eyes glanced to the door of the house. His body shook as he glanced back at Nicky. "What did she say..."

"She's not talking to you or seeing you until you're legitimately clean for a year," Nicky answered. Her voice was cold & dry, her patience cut thin.

Layne bit his lip, turning to look at Jerry. His friend had no words for him. His expression was about as dry as Nicky's tone. It pushed him over to the edge, his legs fleeing him to the key rack in the kitchen & opening the front door.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" Nicky shouted, jumping up from the couch. "You're high as fuck off morphine! What the fuck are you gonna do anyways?! It's 10 in the morning!"

Layne forced a sadistic grin. "I'm leaving."

"What do you mean you're leaving?" Nicky growled. Her eyes narrowed, them sliding to share a look with Jerry. Jerry just seemed to stand there uninterested. He's seen this act from Layne a million times before.

"I'm doing what everyone expects of me," Layne slurred. He stepped out the door & jogged to his motorcycle. "I'm heading to Jordan's," he called out to Nicky, slipping his motorcycle glasses on. "I'm done using Jerry now." He glared up at her, his face suddenly gone cold. "And I'm fucking done with you, cunt."

Nicky's jaw dropped. For once in her life she had no idea what to say. Never in Layne & her's entire relationship did Layne ever call her such a thing. Her eyes watered as she watched him burn out of the driveway.