Chapter 21*

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?'s POV:

He edged ever closer to me, his hand splayed on my chest with the urgency the moment demanded. We had rushed in here breathlessly, following the same routine we always did, hurried kisses peppered over every bit of skin within reach and fingers tangled in hair. Despite having done this countless times, each desperate kiss snuck between classes or after curfew still managed to feel urgent and precious. But something was wrong this time.

He nibbled on my pulse point and I groaned, all cohesive thought eluding me. I could feel his lips smiling against my neck, the confident bastard was all too aware of his effect on me. In retribution, I reached down to squeeze his arse and erase that smugness, but before I could, we froze in unison at a foreign sound.

"Use protection you two!" shouted a voice from the doorway. "#RubberUpForDraco!" That words then dissolved into laughter, which faded quickly, yet we both remained still against each other, barely daring to breathe, both terrified of being caught. Our panicked heartbeats fell into sync, and I couldn't help but inhale his comforting scent, wrapping me up in a sense of warmth and safety even in this moment of fear.

Apparently, he felt the same, putting my lips to my ear once the danger had passed and whispering, "I missed this." He flicked my earlobe with his tongue. "I missed us." He bit the delicate skin at the edge of my jaw. "Merlin, I missed you," he groaned, in a tone so deliciously sinful it sent my blood rushing south. "It's been too long."

My heart felt as if it would beat out of my chest with a terrifying combination of lust and panic, but I let him continue to ravage my neck while I gathered my scattered thoughts. The last time we'd been together, he'd presented me with an impossible choice: going public with our relationship, or ending it.

I pondered it endlessly, tossing and turning my nights away, but there was no escaping the truth. We needed to stay a secret.

Regardless of my resolve to refuse him, simply the ever so familiar sight of the raven-haired boy in front of me in front of me with pink cheeks and eyes full of love was enough to tempt me to let go of all my worries. I suppose it doesn't matter that the school would tear me apart or that my mother would disown me. Yet the more I mulled over telling the world about us, because yes, it would be the world, (with him, it was always the whole damned world) the more I ached to keep him my own delicious secret. If we were to share what we'd been doing in dark corners between classes and on Conjoured couches in the dead of night for months now, our perfect little bubble would be burst by jealous girlfriends and traditionalist parents. No. Better we stay in the shadows, where we could be left alone. Where it was safe.

If only he wasn't so set on bringing my darkness into his light.

Finally slowing enough to tear his attention away from tonguing every inch of my neck, he grinned crookedly at me. I smiled weakly in response. "So," he said, eyes shining hopefully, "have you given my question any thought?"

I swallowed around the lump in my throat. He couldn't even imagine that I wouldn't want to take this step yet, or even at all. Merlin, this is going to break his heart. I tried to swallow again, swiping my tongue across my lips and finding them worryingly dry. I could only hope that he would forgive me quickly. He was bound to. Though we'd fought plenty of times, often bringing about extended periods of silence between us that always culminated in fantastic make-up sex, we always came back to each other, even though our worst fights. This would be a big one, but I was confident that we'd get through it.

I took a deep breath. "No matter what, it simply isn't prudent to tell everyone about us. The repercussions are unimaginable. So my answer is no."

He stumbled back as if the word had physically shoved him, his joy vanishing in favour of confusion and betrayal. "No?"

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