My Brother Says I'm Dangerous

(24)

Hey guys!!!

Sorry for the late update, school just started again and well-that kind of explains it. I promise to update as frequently as possible!!

Thanks so much for the support!! xxx

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I decided to wait to call Casey back. To be honest I'm kind of scared to speak to Leo. I know exactly what I had of his, and I didn't think it would follow me here. Especially now that I can't give it back.

I finish the rest of my toast, and wait for the rest to come down the stairs, so one of them can give me a lift to school. Emily hums her way around the kitchen, I think she's making another pie. It's amazing how much food she has produced recently, getting ready for the branding, which the whole town is practically attending.

"Morning." Isaac moans, followed by the others. Hunter picks up an apple, and I see him raise his eyebrows at the guitar case leaning against the door near my backpack, but he doesn't say anything. 

"Ok." Emily says putting down her spatula. "It's Wednesday. The branding is happening on Saturday. I need all of you to help, because Charlie and Nick don't come back until tomorrow and your father is stressed."

"Don't worry Mom." Jackson smiles, kissing her cheek, stealing a raspberry from her chopping board. "We can handle it."

"I know you can honey." She smiles. "It's just a very big deal this year." 

Everybody quickly finishes their food, and then we head out to the cars. I chuck my guitar in the back of Hunter's ute, and race to the front seat, beating Carter to the front seat.

"So why is this year's branding so important?" Carter asks, squishing into the back.

"Come on man, think it through." Hunter snorts. "Dennings is after us big time, we have the biggest ranch in the area. He's gonna come and make it damn hard for us."

"I hate Harriet's brother." He sighs. "He always copies my math homework and then he looks smart."

"Jeremy is a little shit." Isaac says, texting quickly. "But the whole family is going to be there man. Sitting above the corral in their fancy clothes, eating our food and watching real dude's do the dirty work."

"I would pay to see Noah or his Dad wrestle a calf." David snickers.

"What's their Mom like?" I ask.

"Typical trophy wife." Hunter tells me. "Fundraisers, parties, blah blah blah."

"She never offers to help Mum and the other ladies with the branding food." Carter frowns. "She sits with all the posh people drinking champaign." 

"What will I do during the branding?" I wonder, not even sure what they'll do.

"Mom will probably want help in the kitchen." Carter smiles.

"She will." Hunter shrugs. "But I want to see you tie a calf up."

"Nope." I say bluntly, as we pull up into the school parking lot. "Never going to happen."

"You could round them up on the horses." David teases. I grab my guitar out of the ute tray, slinging it over my shoulder.

"In your dreams dude." I finish, before leaving them, heading into the building.

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The day goes by quickly, but for once I wish it didn't. Last period is music and I think Dave will make me play. Even if he doesn't I still have to listen to the others. He doesn't understand, I'm not ready yet. I try to pay attention in English, wishing it could go on forever, but eventually, the bell sounds, and everybody starts to pack up.

"Are you ready to rock?" Seb grins, walking with me to our class. 

"I think I'll just watch for now." I smile gently.

"Suit yourself." He says, playing with his headphones. "I've been working on some sick beats, I can't wait."

"Do we even have a mixing table?" I ask confused.

"Hell no." He whines. "I wish, I just have to work off my laptop." We walk into the hallway, and enter our class. Everyone looks excited, tuning their instruments, playing tunes.

"Chloe, you're going ham on that oboe!" Seb calls out, heading for his table. She grins, but doesn't stop, as she focuses on a really cool melody.

"Hello chicklings." Dave says, walking in with a cup of coffee. "Yes, I am once again hungover, so please wake me up with music."

"What are we starting with?" Chloe asks, finally putting her oboe down. 

"Well." Dave thinks, draining his cup. "Maybe we could work on some stuff we already finished, to get started."

I discreetly let myself sink into a beanbag, and pull out my theory book. I notice that Dave has pulled out my guitar case from the storage room where I put it, and leaned it against his desk. I ignore it, not wanting to use it. I half heartedly work on theory, half listening to what they play. It actually sounds really good. 

They did a lot of group work, but then they did some stuff by themselves, showing Dave some ideas they came up with. 

"Are you sure you don't want to play with us today?" Seb asks, coming to grab his drumsticks. I nod, playing with my pencil.

They look like they're having fun. Everybody really gets into the music, and I can practically feel their happiness. Against my better judgement I Iean back, letting myself sink into the feeling of the music. 

I love this song. I can't remember what it's called, but it's by John Lennon and I like it. I look at my guitar case, and frown.

Maybe I should tune it. 

It hasn't been tuned in a while. 

Everybody is busy, so I go and pick it up, putting it on Dave's desk. I sit on the chair on the chair, and take a breath. Come on Eva. It's not special. I open the rusty silver clips, lifting the top of the leather case up. I encounter that familiar smell, of leather, wood, and a sort of mustiness that used to make me feel good about myself.

I don't feel anything anymore.

I run my hands over the wood, remembering the texture like it was yesterday. I slowly pick it up, lifting it out of the case, placing it across my knee, the familiar hold coming back to me. I can feel the notches I made near the frets, with the tips of my fingers. I made those when I first got this guitar, when I was still learning chords.

I spend a couple of minutes familiaring myself with it, just holding it. I tighten a couple of strings, it's been a long time since I've played this, let alone tune it. 

I build up the courage to play a chord, and I feel it come back to me. It's like riding a bike. I don't play anything, I just tune. I'm not ready for that yet.

"Enjoying yourself?" I jump, as I'm thrown from my zone that I've only just entered in a long time. I look up to see David, smiling at me.

"I was just tuning it." I explain myself, placing it back into the case quickly. "Nothing major."

"Well you must have been really concentrating." He shrugs. "Class ended ten minutes ago." I look around alarmed, to find no one in the class.

"Why didn't anyone tell me?" I ask.

"You just looked really into it." He says, sitting on his desk. "We didn't want to break your focus."

"You could have." I assure him. "It's not important."

"Of course it is." He says softly. "What happened to you Eva?"

"What do you mean?" I ask, as I can feel my walls being put up once again.

"You say you don't want to play, but it makes you so happy." He explains, running his hand across my guitars strings. "Why don't you let yourself be happy?"

My mouth gapes. not sure how to answer a question like that.

"Some just don't deserve to be." I finally settle on, gently closing my guitar case.

"Life is like a wave man." He sighs. "Sometimes you just have to ride it."