Safe

chapter 22

Chapter 22


"You know nothing." Harry harshly whispered into my ear.


"Please tell me he is wrong, Harry." I whispered.

Harry's gripped around my waist tightened. His actions replacing his venomous voice I was yet to here. His grip was tightening with each breath I took, enabling me to breathe comfortably.

"I can't tell you anything." He said in disgust.

I gasped when Harry moved from my side to on top of me. His long muscular legs holding my small body beneath him. My wrists were taken securely above me, strong hands holding them still. His smirk was evident as I struggled for him to let me go. My hair fanned around me as well as in my face from moving my head back and forth trying to free from his grasp. I felt one cool hand release my own, his other still firmly holding my two small ones above me. His right hand came down to my face, moving the stray hair from my vision. He smirked when my eyes grew wide as he leaned down closer to me. He stopped inches from my lips, looking me straight in the eyes. Harry's soft lips grazed my own before they slowly moved toward my ear; his touch never leaving my skin.

"You have no right to think of me as the way I used to be." His raspy voice bit.

"Then stop giving me a reason to, Harry! You holding me here like I mean nothing to you, is only proving my point!" I shouted.

Harry's face changed. His bright green eyes grew to an incredible dark shade of jade. His eyes pinning me on the spot. I stopped moving, I stopped talking, hell, I think I even stopped breathing. I only laid and watched, as the beautiful boy above me change into something he said he would never go back to.

An excruciating pain shot threw my wrists, my body being squeezed harder by Harry's legs slowly clamping shut. His head came closer and closer, until his rough lips landed on mine. I moved and struggled to get out of his hold only for him to grunt in response.

"Stop moving." He moaned.

"This isn't you, Harry. Look at me." I whispered. His eyes pierced through mine, no emotion shown. It's like he was looking right through me. "Look at yourself. You said you're not this person. You said you're not a monster, but look at your hands, Harry. Look at mine skin."

His eyes travelled to the large armour on the side of the room; the vast mirror showing our full position. Dark eyes travelled up my body, right to my hands. His head snapped back to my wrists, fully taking in the appearance of his tight hold. His eyes once again regained their bright green, his pupils dilating in shock. He removed his hands slowly, and backed away from me. He never looked me in the eye, he never said a word. His only emotion was shock. Harry backed off of the bed and away from me. His feet taking him to an empty corner, opposite of the room. His large hands covered his face as his back slide down wall. Curls fell down in front of his face, his hands relentlessly pushing them back. His breathing was erratic, broken breathes could be heard all the way from where I sat. His long legs were pulled to his chest and his head was kept down. He hadn't stopped tugging his hair, it's almost as if he wanted to pull something in mind out of his head.

I looked down at my wrists, examining the pale skin that was brandished with deep red marks that matched Harry's fingertips. My small fingers brushed the surface of each mark, wincing each time I pressed too hard. Harry kept his head low but watched me with hooded eyes. I slowly got up from the bed and made my way to him. I slid down the next to him, keeping a comfortable separation between us. My arms rested on my bent knees as I watched Harry look straight ahead.

"They'll go away." I stated.

"They shouldn't have been there to begin with." He whispered.

"Everything is still fine between us, Harry. This doesn't change us." I said gesturing to my newly wounded wrists. Yes, they did hurt, and yes, they'll be clearly visible for a week or so, but this hadn't changed us. If anything, I've brought up some more details of Harry's obscure life.

"How are you still here? I've physically hurt you. I've lost myself in front of the one person I promised myself I wouldn't. And look at the outcome." Harry whispered looking away from me.

The marks on my wrists bothered him more than it had myself. The one the had to endure the pain, and see change in the one you care for most. Just looking at me caused Harry to flinch away in shame.

I moved closer to him, my right side brushing his left. He still sat half a head taller than me, but my legs ended up underneath me, bringing us to the level. I brought my hand to the side of his head, slowly dragging out his hair and brushing aside some of his curls. Pulling each one apart from each other, into tiny baby locks.

"I don't blame you any of this, Harry. Things happen, people get mad. I've seen it happen. And I know you won't let if happen again. I trust you." I stated.

"I-I don't trust myself around you." He mumbled into his hands, running them over his face in distress. "I can't promise it won't happen again. You have no idea how much I wish I could control myself. I would take it all back. I don't want to be what I was."

"That's exactly it, 'was'. You're not that person anymore, Harry. These marks do not make you that person you were."

"They shouldn't be on your wrists, Rae!" He yelled in frustration.

I saw a tear escape his eye and I quickly wiped it away. I moved to sit in front of him, in between his legs. My thumb rubbing the apple of his cheek, ready to wipe away anymore aggravated tears. My left hand found his right and I entwined them. I pressed my forehead to his, my mouth inched from his.

"It's alright. I'm okay. Harry, just look at me." I whispered to him.

He looked up at me, glassy green eyes looking straight into mine.

"It doesn't define you. These marks do not change how I feel about you. They do not change the fact that I still care for you, or the fact that I know you still care me. We can work on this, together. You and me. Us."

I had tears streaming down my face the whole time. Small ones falling from Harry's eyes too. I pulled Harry into a kiss, no bothering to wipe away the tears or hold in the new ones forming. His hand had moved to my cheek, cupping it in desperation. The kiss held more than lust. It was passion, and honesty that I promised to help and he had promised to try. My brandished skin didn't change anything between us. It was nothing more then a flaw on my body.

I pulled away from Harry and let the tears keep falling. I didn't care if I looked like a wreck with my tear strained cheeks. It showed progress. Progress between us.

"As much as I'd look to stay here and watch us both become emotional again, I have to go home. And I'm sure Liam is still waiting out there for you." I half laughed.

Harry nodded and wiped away the few tears he had shed. He got up from the floor lifting me up with him. He had me in a hug as soon as I regained my balance from sitting. I smiled and squeezed him back harder, which caused him to lift me up effortlessly and wrap my legs his waist.

"I don't deserve someone as amazing as you." He breathed into the crook of my neck.

"Maybe I'm exactly what you need."

***

I walked back home from Harry's to meet up with my dad. He had been determined to take me out for dinner. He was admin about getting in some father daughter time.

"Anyone home?" I called out walking through the front door.

"In here, Rae." My dad called back.

I placed my crossover on the hook behind the door and took off my shoes. When I walked into the living room, my dad was leaning against the sofa with a large box in his hands. He watched the TV with close eyes, not paying attention the fact I was standing there. I cleared my throat and he snapped his head in my direction.

"Oh, um this is for you. For tonight because I'm taking you somewhere special for dinner." My dad smiled.

"Okay..." I trailed off taking the box from him, and placing it on the sofa ready to open it.

I unravelled the big purple bow from the blue box, lifting the lid slowly. The white tissue paper covered a beautiful deep violet dress. I pulled the dress up from the box and examined it further. It was one shouldered and had flimsy fabric flowers across the bust line to the shoulder strap. The waist line was tight but it flowed out to what i assumed would be right above my knee. It was by far, the most beautiful dress I have ever laid eyes on.

"It was your mum's." My dads voice said breaking me out of my thoughts.

"I-I love it." I whispered almost to myself.

"I bought it for her. She wore it on our first anniversary of being married and that night she told me she was pregnant with you."

He smiled at the old memory. I couldn't help but to smile back at him. I got up from the sofa and pulled him into a bone crushing hug.

"This means so much to me."

"Go put it on, our reservations are in an hour." He told me.

I hurriedly took my dress and went upstairs. I took my shower and redid my hair and makeup. I added many bracelets to cover the bruises on my wrists. Hoping they won't show tonight. To say I was excited for dinner tonight was actually a surprise for me. My dad likes to go to many fancy restaurants -some of which I can not pronounce- because he can and he has the money. But I was excited because I actually got to wear that beautiful dress, and be connected to her somehow. Maybe this night wouldn't have been as bad as I originally thought. I would have guessed that the night would have been filled with bickering or complete silence.

I pulled on my heels and came down the stairs to my well dressed father. He looked smart as ever, wearing one of his best suits. His dark hair pushed back, and face cleanly shaven. He almost didn't look like my father. He looked way to young to have an eighteen year old daughter.

"You look just like your mum."

I smiled at him and took his arm, leading us to the front door. He grabbed his wallet and handed me a clutch I've never seen before.

"Rachael at the office said it would match." He chuckled.

"Should've known. You're hopeless with clothing."

"And that is why I have you pick out my ties."

"And your shir-" I was about to say shirts when the sight in front of me caught me off guard. "You rented a freaking limo?! Dad, where the hell are going? An award show?" I gasped.

"Not exactly, but we are going somewhere very nice, and I want to make up for the way I've been acting towards you. I know I've been irrational but it's hard for me as a dad to understand. I-I just want to try and make up for it. I know this won't, but I'm hoping its a start." He smiled.

I only nodded and gave a small smile, not exactly sure what to say. He opened the door and let me make my way in. I slid to the limo, taking the seat that sat vertical to the road. My dad took the seat in back leaving enough room for his long legs.

The ride into the city was quick. We didn't talk much but I had asked a few questions about the dress which only led to my dad telling more stories of my mum. But I didn't mind at all.

A man close to his sixties in a black suit opened our door, and took my hand helping me out. I kindly thanked him and waited for my dad to tip the elder man. My dad lead me into the ravish restaurant which had held many guests you could see from the window looking in. Every man dressed in a formal suit or a tux like my father, or a elegant dress like my own. Tables set with fine china and gold coloured napkins and royal red table cloths. The marble tile led to a large stand.

"We have a reservation for two, Clarke." My dad charmingly smiled.

"Ah yes, Clarke. Right this way." The man smiled and lead us to a small table in the centre of the large room.

He pulled out my chair for me and I thanked him, my dad taking his seat on the opposite side of me. He gave us our menus and told us our waiter with be right with us.

"Any reason why you had picked such a fancy place to eat?" I lightly chuckled.

"Well, I wanted you to give you that dress for a while now, and I never found the right time to give it to you, so I guess I wanted to give it to you sooner than later. And then I wanted to give you a reason to wear it, so here we are." He smiled.

"I feel like we don't fit in." I admitted.

"Me either, but I can bet you that most of the people here don't either."

The waiter soon came over and took our drink and dinner orders. I was confused most of dinner as to why there was three forks on one side of the plate, two spoons on the other, and one knife. My dad had directed me through most of the dinner on proper silverware usage. I had ignored him and used one fork for all courses; I didn't see the use to waste two extra. Most of the time he had laughed at me because I was so baffled by the large men and their wives who were rude beyond compare. Obviously they had let their money go to their head. Sure, my dad had money to spare, especially for being a single parent, but he had never let the money drive him, only his love for his job. And I hadn't used my dads money like most kids do. If I did, I wouldn't have a job and I would have stopped trying to pay for my own clothing a while back.

"You know, I took your mother here for our first date." My dad somewhat smiled.

"Really?"

"Yes, and she acted the same way you are." He laughed.

"I don't blame her. I've never seen so many dishes come an go in one sitting." I chuckled loudly.

"It's amazing how much you're like her. I swear it's like she's be cloned!" He laughed louder.

Our laughing had caused attention to us, and we now had many pairs of eyes staring at us. I bowed my head down in embarrassment, not having enough courage to look at them and apologise.

When I had looked up, my eyes met with a very attractive boy about my age sitting a few tables back. He was blonde and had green eyes. But his eyes didn't compare to Harry's in the slightest. The boy smirked at me and sent me a sly wink. I looked away, disgusted. Cocky bastard let my wondrous eyes get to his head.

"How about dessert?" My dad asked.

I nodded in response, and let my dad order for us. I told him I wanted cake, and minutes later, our waiter set a mini round cake in front of me. It was all chocolate. Chocolate cake, chocolate icing, and chocolate topping. Heaven.

Halfway through our dessert, my dad paid the bill, and I started to finish up. Out of the corner of eye I could see the boy from before excuse himself from his table, fix his suit without a coat, and make his way towards our table.

"Hello, my name is Connor." He introduced himself to my dad. "And I was just admiring you beautiful daughter, and I thought I'd ask you for your permission to ask her on a date." He smiled.

"I'm sure she would love that." My dad answered.

"I'm right here. I think I get to answer if I want to go on a date with him." I interjected.

Who does this boy think he his? I am dating someone. Well, they don't know that. He said yes for me because he thinks I'm single. Great.

"Well..."

"Rae." I answered.

"Well, Rae. Would you like to go on a date with me?" He smiled showing his pure white teeth.

"No, I would not like to."

"And why not? He seems like a fine young man." My dad asked.

I can't go on a date with him because I'm dating the one person you truly despise. But if I don't then I have to say why. And I'm a horrid liar.

"Okay, I will."

***

After I exchanged numbers with Connor, I was ready to leave. The ride home was silent, and I didn't mind. I was still upset that I even agreed, but if I hadn't, my dad would have found out about Harry and I because I've alway been shit liar.

I gave my dad and giant hug and thanked him for such a wonderful night. I couldn't be mad at him, he didn't know. I went up to my room and straight into my bathroom, ready to take out the over bobby-pinned bun I created for the night, and wash off my makeup. Nothing feels better than taking off your heels after a whole night in them and walking about barefoot afterwards. Guys will never understand how that is truly the best feeling in the world. I stripped my dress and carefully hung it back in my closet, knowing that it was still fairly clean, and that the old dress may not be able to take the beating in the wash. I pulled my pyjamas on, grabbed my book, and snuggled into bed.

About an hour later, I decided to put my book up and sleep for the night. I was just about to fall asleep when I heard the window open behind me and steps come closer to my bed. Harry. He took off his shoes and got into the bed, and spooned be from behind.

"How was it?" He asked running his long digits through my hair.

"Yeah...about tonight.." I cautiously replied.

"What happened?"

"You know that my dad doesn't know about us right?"

"Mhmm." He hummed.

"Well there was this guy there and he asked me out and I said no but my dad said why not and I couldn't tell him why I said no because he usually knows when I'm lying because I'm an awful liar and so I had to say yes but I don't want to go and please don't be mad." I rambled whispering.

"Babe, I'm not mad."

"You're not?" I questioned.

"Mad, no. Slightly pissed because I have to share you with a prick for one night, yes. Just, make sure it doesn't go further than a first date. Dump his arse so hard he won't come back." He told me.

I laughed and turned around to face him. His hair was in a beanie but small locks of hair still escaped onto his forehead.

"I don't even want it to be a date." I giggled.

"If he pulls a move on you, I will have no problem beating the shit out of him." He smiled.

I laughed quietly and pulled him in for a kiss. I pecked a few sweet kisses on his lips before curling into his side and closing my eyes.

"Goodnight, Beautiful."






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I picture Rae's dad to look like Christian Bale, and Connor to look like Connor Franta haha.