Lean On Me #Wattys2016

Part 19

Mateo

Her skin is heated beneath my palm, a light flush stretching out up her neck and across her cheeks. I can see the red marks where my beard has scratched her and I'm feeling a strange mix of guilt and pride—sorry I hurt her but so happy I've left my mark. I pull her waistband away from her skin and let my fingers brush all along the top of her panties before I pull them away too. She's soft and a beautiful combination of feminine and strong. I've never been with anyone like her and I know she's going to ruin a piece of me for any girl after.

I push the fabric down her legs as far as I can with my limited flexibility. She never falters, picking up where I left off. She kicks her shoes off then tosses her pants and panties to the side, somewhere near where I threw her shirt and now she is standing brilliantly naked in front of me.

I close my eyes and try to hold back a smile, "You know," I whisper, "if you weren't so pretty I could make this last a little longer." I laugh, completely comfortable with her already. She laughs too as she slips her hands beneath my shorts and boxers, pushing them down as she grabs my ass.

"And if you weren't so cute, I'd make you take me out a few times first." She's full on giggling now and I love it. I like making her laugh and I like that she has the same effect on me.

"Thank God for that then," I say through a smile. My lips are back on hers in such aggressive pursuit she has to rest her head against the door so I don't knock her over. She drives me insane. I feel crazy for her. My feet are already bare so finishing the task of removing my clothing is easy and quick. Her hand moves down my side, over my hip and starts to slide lower.

I'm not a narcissistic guy, but my pride just can't get past how awful my thigh looks. When her fingers tease the skin beneath my hip and dance their way down to my upper thigh I completely tense up. My hand is over hers in no time at all and I stop her from letting them move any lower. I pull back from the kiss and watch her face. She seems hurt and I hate that. My heart feels attacked in my chest.

"What's wrong?" she asks tenderly with an edge of concern. I'm not sure how to tell her. I haven't really even spoken about it with anyone. I know it shouldn't matter, but it does. I pull her hand up and hold it between mine.

"It's bad,"

Her brows furrow in question and she stares into my eyes as if she'll find the answer there. "What's bad?" When I don't answer her it only takes as moment for her to realize what it is that I'm not saying. "It doesn't matter to me." She pulls on her hand, but I don't release it.

"It does to me." I can't believe in the heat of everything I forgot about keeping it covered. I feel exposed and vulnerable. Both are feelings I despise.

"I'll close my eyes," she offers sweetly. I shake my head. She's quick to finish the thought I didn't know I was interrupting. "Just long enough for you to get your boxers. I'll close them until you're covered." She doesn't wait for my answer—doesn't give me a chance to say no. She just shuts her beautiful, forgiving eyes and stands still. Her naked body before me is just as vulnerable as mine, but she trusts me. I don't move to grab them right away because I can't take my eyes off of her. It's not even just what she looks like, it's the way she holds no judgment. It only confirms what I've known all along. Ashlyn isn't just gorgeous on the outside; she's remarkable on the inside too.

"Thanks sunshine," I whisper and I know she thinks I'm talking about letting me cover my scars, but really it's so much more than that. I grab them from the floor and slide them back up my legs. It's not graceful at all. I know there has to be a few times when my foot thuds loudly against the floor as I wobble on my unsteady leg when she wants to open her eyes and reach out to me—but she keeps her word. And then something strange happens. I think that I'll feel less vulnerable with my cotton boxers as a wall between the ugly part of me and her beauty, but what she just did has stripped all the armor I was wearing and I stand before her more vulnerable than before. 

*****Do you love him yet? I think Mateo is becoming one of my favorite characters to write.  Don't forget to vote/comment/share. Find me on Instagram and twitter (at)SarahWhiteWrite!