Mocked: A Marcel Fanfic

Chapter Forty-Four

Chapter Forty-Four


"What does that mean? That you wouldn't be standing here right now?" I'm literally so confused as to what she's talking about. She just keeps talking in circles and not explaining herself.

"It means that I wouldn't have continued Mocking people. That I would have found that one person I wanted to spend my time with instead of drawing Xs on my walls. I would never have had a reason to spend time with you."

My head hurts. "So you only hung out with me because you had to?" That stings. It feels worse than saying she felt bad for me.

Veronica frowns and I know that I'm right. "What about the whole you wanting to show me that there's good people? That it's not always about people being hurtful towards me? I don't remember what you told me exactly but I know you said something amongst those lines. Are you saying that it was all because you were forced to hang out with me?" I feel the urge to vomit. Everything I thought I knew with Veronica is a complete lie.

"I had to, Harry. You don't understand what-"

"I DON'T UNDERSTAND?!" I exclaim, stomping towards the counter that is between us, my fists curled against the countertop. "EXACTLY, I DON'T UNDERSTAND. WHICH IS WHY YOU SHOULD START FUCKING EXPLAINING YOURSELF! STOP TALKING IN CIRCLES AND JUST SPIT IT OUT! DID YOU ONLY HANG OUT WITH ME BECAUSE YOU HAD TO?!" I'm fuming, my words booming out around us.

Veronica doesn't look up at me, her brown hair covering that goddamn face of hers. "Harry, please stop yelling at me. Everyone yells at me. I can't stand to hear you yelling at me too."

I glare at her. Don't yell at her? Even now after all this shit she thinks she can just ask me not to yell at her?

"At first I only did it because I had to. You're right about that one. It was right after we saw each other outside of the principal's office. I was out there because I ditched class to get another pack of cigarettes from Aiden, but I got caught by one of the security guards taking Bryce to the office. So I had to sit out there as well. And when I pulled out a cigarette and started smoking it, you sat beside me. When I looked up I almost laughed right then and there at your face. You were pale, confused, scared and had that ridiculous bruise on your face.

"Anyways, I didn't have plans in sticking around. I've already been serving that after school bullshit for weeks and there's nothing further they can really do to me. So I left you there and I met back up with Aiden."

I remember back to the first day I actually talked to her. I was confused as to why she even bothered to speak to me. What beautiful girl spends a couple minutes of her time on me? A guy who had large glasses and a tie on, his clothes always pressed to perfection. It made no sense to me.

"And then Bryce came out a couple minutes later," Veronica starts talking again and I focus on her. "He was literally fuming with anger. He kept cussing about how fucked up this whole thing was. He said that he wanted nothing more than to beat "your fucking pussy ass" for being a faggot and getting him in trouble. And honestly, at that moment, I just laughed along with Aiden at how mad Bryce was. That's how I was, Harry, I made fun of everyone and you were a classic topic with the guys. I never thought Aiden would take me seriously when I joked about being able to sleep with you."

"You joked about that?" I can't yell anymore, an abrupt sheet of sadness falling over me.

"I did. And then Aiden told me that I should play you. I had already gone through everyone else at that damn school. But I didn't only do it because of that reason. I did it to protect you."

"Protect me? From what? I was already being tortured every day. I was already walking around getting taunted with every step. What could you have possibly protected me from?!"

"Remember how I kept getting between you and Bryce? I stopped him from continuously hurting you. And when I took the deal with Aiden I told him that I wanted another rule to be added. One that stated that he couldn't hurt or touch you while I was Mocking you. He was close to beating you up a couple times, said it was only right to put you back in your place, but the rule I made with him protected you from that. Harry, don't you see?! I only did it to keep you away from all those people who wanted to hurt you!" Her eyes meet mine desperately and she tries to reach across the counter at me.

"Then why didn't you just sleep with me and get it over with?" I still don't get it.

"Because then the game is over and Aiden, Bryce, and anyone who wants to can beat you up."

"How would they know that we slept together?"

"I'd have to tell them."

"Now that doesn't make any sense. Why can't you keep it to yourself?"

Veronica groans and pulls at her hair. "Harry, it's just how it goes. Okay? Can't you accept that. It's how it is. I pick out a guy, I Mock them, I tell everyone else, and they humiliate the guy. There's no other simpler way of saying it!"

"How about we say it's fucked up? You hurt all these people just for fun. You play with their hearts. Veronica, you don't even care about these guys who practically give you all of them!" The fact that she doesn't care about them makes me sad, I can't imagine someone being so heartless.

"That's how it was Harry," Veronica shrugs. "That's how it has always been. Guys are douche bags who deserve what they got."

"What could I have possibly done to deserve this? The heartbreak, the anger and pain and all the frustration. Everything I've never felt before you. What did I do to deserve all this?" I feel the tears start up again and I try hard to not cry.

Veronica breathes out and shuts her eyes. "You didn't do anything. You were just a good excuse for a bad person to do an awful deed."

"So everything we did was fake," I state.

Veronica looks up at me again and I watch as she walks around the counter, coming closer to me. I feel my feet rooted to the floor and I can't walk away. I step back and she gets in front of me, right in front of me.

"No, none of it was fake," she whispers and I feel my heart ache for her.

"But I'm just a part-"

"You were. You're not anymore," she interrupts. "You stopped being a play thing right from the beginning. I found myself confused by you, wondering why you were so mistreated. In art class when I drew the back of you, when Madam said to draw with our eyes closed. I cheated and kept my eyes open, drawing you with every detail."

"Why?"

"Because I wanted you to know that I could see you when no one else could. That I saw you," she whispers and reaches up suddenly, her hand on my cheek. I can't move away. "That I still see you."

"Like that piece of paper at the museum."

She nods. "I told you, you're misunderstood. And you're right," she says, looking directly at me.

"I'm right?"

Veronica brushes her hand down my cheek and places her hand on my heart. "I fell for someone and it's more scary than anything. I can feel control slipping through my fingers."

I reach up and take her hand, intwining our fingers. "You can hold onto me instead," I whisper.

"I've fallen for you, Harry." Her words make my chest hurt and I hold her waist against me. "And I'm scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Scared of you hurting me."



**A/N**

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