The Life of an Introvert

Surviving Group Projects

You know that moment when your teacher is assigning a project? You know when he says "partner up" and you start silently cursing in your head?

There's a squeak as chairs scrape back from desks. Kids turn to each other, pointing first at themselves, then at their designated partners, excitement lighting up their eyes. I stay waiting anxiously in my seat, trying to prepare myself for inevitable humiliation. Some kids don't even hesitate. They head right for their partners. Others hang around for a bit before finding a friend in class. A minutes passes, then two. I'm wishing I were anywhere but here, After another minute, I start to get nervous. Then the teacher asks the fateful words.

"Is there anybody that doesn't have a partner?"

Sometimes I'm the only person in class that raises their hand, sometimes not. The teacher would usually grab the first two kids without a partner and shove them together. "Okay you and you work together."

So, yes, as you probably know by now, if you're a person who likes working more on their own, group work can be annoying. Group or partner work, however, is something we will all have to go through, as learning how to collaborate with others is definitely a useful skill you'll need later on in life. I think ideally classrooms should have a balance of group and individual work. The best is when teachers give a choice. A lot of my teachers assign a project and give us the option to either do it in a group or on our own.

Unfortunately, sometimes you may not have a choice.

Some kids will end up working with someone they don't know. Someone they're not sure they can trust, if they have to do a group project. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. New friendships and trust can grow from partners that aren't quite friends yet. Sometimes you have to work with people you don't like. Sometimes you get along with and learn things about somebody you've never really paid attention to before.

In my first year of middle school, we were asked to find partners for a project. I knew a couple people in my class from elementary school, but as I was about to go over to them, I saw a boy standing alone at his desk and staring at the teacher. I walked over to him and asked him to be my partner. He said yes.

It's been a couple of years. We're now best friends.

Even if you get to choose who your partner's gonna be, it doesn't always have to be a designated friend. Take a chance. If you see a kid standing by his desk, unsure, pick him.

Worse case scenario, you won't like him. It wouldn't be the end of the world. Take a chance.

The words "partner up" can be dreadful. But you definitely have options. If you're lucky, someone will come along and pick you. If not and you want to avoid being singled out by the teacher, be brave and walk up to someone else who doesn't have a partner. If everyone has a partner but you, you may get lucky and have the option to work on your own if you want to. Either way, you can potentially avoid the awkwardness of your teacher pairing you up in a group with two other people who are friends and resent you intruding on their group.

But what if worst comes to worst? What if you end up being put in a group where the people don't like you or make you do all the work? Or what if no one listens to you, no one else puts any effort into it, and you suffer because of it?

This only happened to me once, but I definitely learned my lesson from that one time. Once I was put into a group with three other people. The project was supposed to be done in school and we had to recreate an ancient tomb inside a cardboard box. This was a pretty big project, so it really did require the efforts of four people. But every time we met up in class, everyone else would goof off and tell (very) dirty jokes (yes I know we were only in sixth grade but kids grow up fast these days or something). We got in trouble, and by we I do mean me too, simply for being at the same table.

Anyway, what ended up happening was that I had to do most (all) of the work. Keep in mind I'm no artist, and I had to actually create this fake tomb as well as design and write about it. It was supposed to be a lovely, golden, majestic tomb. But by the time I was finished with it, it looked more like a drunk mummy had drowned in the stream of his own urine.

We got a B. Points off for lack of creativity. In my own defense, I can barely draw stick figures. The fact that I was able to recreate any sort of tomb at all was a miracle in itself.

So what was my point with all this?

My point is that I was too timid to speak up and say that the other people should also get off their butts and help me. Basically I didn't want to be that person who tattles and ruins it for everybody.

My advice is this. When it comes to group projects, you may occasionally have to step up and be a leader if you're serious about your grades. You may also have to let people know when you think they are not doing their fair share of the work, albeit in a calm and respectful way. For my drunk urine mummy project, I didn't speak up to my group members or the teacher when I was getting in trouble for stuff they did or for when they literally were not doing any work.

I should have spoken up to someone. Sometimes you have to be that person, especially if you yourself are getting screwed over and getting into trouble by your group mates messing around. Sometimes, if groupmates are still being total ass-I mean silly people, then you may have to go to the teacher. If your teacher is not a complete dic-I mean unreasonable person, then hopefully they can sort something out for you so you don't get screwed over.

Of course, if your teacher is the "I put you with them so you can be friends and get along and play in the sunshine together" type, then you may have some issues there too. I think teachers, especially high school teachers, should know that not all students will be BFFs with each other, and that's okay. Sometimes it's just not a good idea to put someone who doesn't give an eff with someone who actually wants to get work done.

Trust me, your teammates are not gonna stab and murder you painfully for going to the teacher.They may be pissed at you for making them do actual work, but they're not going to hate you. In a week, they're not going to remember or give a crap.

Group projects aren't always bad. In classes where I have close friends, I actually prefer them. Although that may have more to do with the social aspect. I've noticed that all in all, I work a lot better on my own. Some people may get more done in a group.

Just remember that when you get out into the real world, you'll have more freedom and say in who your partners are, and you can pick people that have goals and want to accomplish something. If you want to, you can go into a line of work that doesn't involve as much group collaboration. You'll have a lot more control. Unless you just want to pick your best friends as partners so you can goof off with them (I won't judge).

Either way, choose wisely.