Conversations From Afar

91 / christmas shopping

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"Oh, Abby would like this." Gabriel, always wonderful at present-buying, plucks up a cute grey sweater in Aerie and checks the price tag. 

"But what would Cam like?"

"Probably nothing in here." He replies, wryly. We do a circuit of the store and I pick up a five-dollar lace bralette while he's paying for the cute sweater and a bottle of spray that he says reminds him of tropical soccer-playing. "Think, face kits or something like that. I like those, and I think he's running low on the Keihl's stuff I gave him last year."

We move onto the Bay and peer at the Keihl's counter. Gabriel leans against it and points, "Oh, look at that, facial fuel. How masculine."

"So Abby went home instead of staying around?"

"Yeah, she missed her brother and I wanted to see Cam..." he shrugs, just a little bit sadly. "We're going to exchange gifts when she comes back though, mostly because neither of us got anything yet."

"Mm... can I see the blue set?" I ask the man wearing all black. He nods and looks like Steve Jobs in his glasses, and puts it on the counter. It comes with a blue leather bag and assorted creams and cleansers and aftershave-things. The tester smells very minty and refreshing.

"So how have you been?" Gabriel asks, shifting from foot to foot, already restless. "We haven't talked in forever and a half."

"I've been okay. I mean, a few little things but it's all settled now."

"That's good... but you look so weird." I give him an odd look before telling Steve Jobs that I'll take it. "I mean, it just looks like something's weighing on you and here I am, your best friend, waiting for you to let me take some of the weight..."

It's sixty dollars, and I use my debit card.

When we walk out he looks a little hurt so I link arms with him and lean into his side. He throws his weight back into me and we drift across the mallway (like a hallway, but in the mall). "I had some dreams about Alex, I'm not sure why, but Cam and I talked about it and I feel somewhat better."

"Why would you have dreams about Alex?"

"Well..." he's looking like he genuinely has no idea. "You know."

"No, I don't. Cam just told me that Alex treated you wrong and that it might be a good idea to beat the crap out of him. What happened? He didn't... oh. He raped you? Oh my God, and I didn't even punch him... I've never felt more regretful in my life. Wow. So he raped you? Did you tell anyone? Holy shit if only I could see him now. You know I've never actually beat anyone up? I always had lackeys to do the dirty work but - he... Kat, why didn't you tell me? I mean" -

"Gabriel, shut up he didn't rape me." We stop in front of Cinnabon and he stares down at me with huge, shocked-Gabriel-eyes. "He just... almost raped me." 

He takes a moment to process that. I lead him by the elbow and buy him a cinnamon bun while he stares at his shoes with a furrow between his eyebrows.

When we're walking again, he speaks. "Almost is just as bad if you're still dreaming about it."

I offer him the cinnamon bun. "I told my mom when we got back."

"Okay..." he takes a large bite. "Mm... want to go pick each other's gift out?"

"I thought last year's cheating was a one-time thing?"

"C'mon, I have to beat Cam for my ego." I roll my eyes but let him lead me down the mallway. He pats my hand that's resting on his elbow, "And I'll always be here for you, Kat. Tell me anything, even if it's something gross with my older brother."