Adopted by Markiplier?! {Hiatus}

How 'bout nonce?

A/N: Many exclamation points. So many.
I'm sorry for the wait. I'm horrible at updating.
Also this one has a lot more swearing in then any other chapters so far so if it offends you I'll start censoring, aight? Also please don't take offence to the descriptions I've used for one of these characters. I literally thought of a pig when I was describing this one. Like the cartoonish kind.

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Orphanage-woman-pig (not to be confused with Orphanage-woman-lady because orphanage-woman-lady is not pig) trotted in and wedged herself into the wide sofa. I saw her legs twitch as if she was about to cross her legs but she stopped before she even started.
"Ahem. So sweetie, in the past month how has your time been in the household? Have you enjoyed yourself?"
"My name isn't 'sweetie'. It's Audrey and I'd appreciate if you called me by that name,"
Her beady eyes widened, making her look like some freaky pig/human/owl hybrid.
"And to answer your question. Yes, I have enjoyed myself. I've been treated better in this month then I have in my 14 years of being in the orphanage,"
"O-oh, alright then. Mr Fischbach, has Audrey the had any, how should I say," She paused to ponder on what to say " 'behavioural issues' in the past month that she has been living with you and your housemates?"
If this bitch didn't shut her snout, I would of smacked the bitch up. As it turns out, I'm not that good at masking my anger for pigs because Matt reached over and gave my shoulder a semi-reassuring squeeze as if to remind me what was at stake here. If I fucked this up, I would have to go back. No questions,no deals, no second chances.
"No, Audrey has behaved perfectly. She's settled in fine as well,"
I remembered the incident that had made that question have to be asked. I swear they can't get it in their heads that it was a one time thing and I didn't know it was lit! Accidents happen! Besides, he was SO asking for it!
"Is this the same case for the two of you?"
Matt and Ryan nodded.
"Great! That's certainly a first isn't it, Audrey?"
"Would you like to stop patronizing me" I growled (I'm a dog now mate) with the harshest glare I could.
She widened her eyes at my outburst before shaking her head and continuing with her bullshit. It was the regular 'any issues' before going over regulations that we all needed to know even though we had all said that we already knew them. 'Just a precaution, dearie'
"So, I'm only going to say this once-"
"How about nonce?"
"Audrey, don't be rude. But anyway, what I was going to say is that if there is even one single issue that needs addressing urgently, all four of you have my number and messages are recorded,so I will always receive them and help in whatever way I can"

What felt like fucking years later (I think it came to about an hour), oink oink finally fucking left. As soon as we heard the door close we all let out giant sighs. Just because she left didn't mean my overwhelming urge to punch the bitch had subsided.
"You alright Audrey?"Matt piped up.
"I have the meanest urge to punch a bitch so I'm not to sure,"
"Language!" Mark shouted from the kitchen doing god knows what.
"English!" I shouted back to him.
"So Mark's getting sassed by a sixteen year-old again,"
"Am not!"
"Lying is a sin, Mark," Matt interjected.
This got a lil laugh out us, easing me up a fair bit.
Mark appeared again out of the kitchen with two cups in his hands, both appearing to be topped with whipped cream and lil fluffy balls of delight.
"So change yourself into something comfortable, we're watching thangs and playing games,"
"Are we recording or nah?"
"Uhhhh, actually yeah, if that's okay?"
"Yee, das kay,"

And so I jogged up the stairs to change into more comfortable things. ((Here's where following me on Polyvore is useful))

I managed to find a thick woolly cardigan which was one of my absolute favourite things that wasn't a hoodie. After a bit of foraging, I managed to find one of my loose baseball kind of shirts and three quarter leggings. Quickly rummaging through my drawers, I found a woolly beanie hat and a clean pair of fluff socks. I couldn't be bothered to do anything with my hair but forced a bobble onto my wrist as a precaution before jogging back down stairs to the boys. They already had a camera set up with an array of various vidjagames in front them on the coffee table.
"You're more stressed, you pick,"
I shuffled in between Mark and Matt, taking in the different games he had.

A/N: I'm currently waiting on a paragraph to introduce you guys to the new characters. I'm also going to change some characters for reasons so if y'all get notifications for updates it's probs not legit. I also have a tag thing to finish and upload. Sorry for longs waits and that.
Peace.