21 | If I Ain't Got You

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| Angel Roberts |

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you, baby
If I ain't got you, baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, yeah
~ Alicia Keys

I watched as King laid in his hospital bed, eyes closed with a tube down his throat. Holding my tears back wasn't even an option because all I could think was 'this is all your fault'. Grabbing his hand, I kissed it, holding it in mine, giving silent prayers that everything would be okay.

"You know, I never thought we'd make it this far.", I chuckled a little, finding myself talking to him. "I never thought you would care about me, or we'd be here. I never thought I'd develop this love for you or that you'd protect me from any and everything. I let you down."

I lowered my head, wiping my tears with the back of my free hand. Peering over his body, all I wanted was for him to wake up, forgive me and everything go back to normal.

"I was supposed to keep you out of harms way. It was supposed to be me laying in a hospital bed, not you.", I cried out.

I felt a touch on my shoulder as I cried over King's motionless body. The person pulled me into an embrace and I recognized the scent from anywhere. I hugged her back, crying into her shoulder as she cried into mine.

"I'm so sorry!", I cried as she held me tightly "I'm so sorry Mrs. Jackson! This was all my fault!"

"It wasn't baby girl. King is my strong baby boy. He'll be fine. Don't beat yourself up over this.", she stated, pulling away and looking me in my eyes.

Looking over her shoulder, I watched as my father and Brandy walked into the room. She noticed my sudden stiffness and turned around, facing him.

"Tyree.", she stated with a stern tone.

"Jamerica.", he sized her a little, walking over to a chair with Brandy on his tail.

"You have no liable reason to be here. I'm going to need you to leave.", she stated, motioning towards the door with her hand.

"I'm here for my daughter-"

"Don't be.", I interrupted him, not even wanting to be mentioned in the bullshit about to exit his mouth.

"You shouldn't even be here! Your ass needs to be home and away from this little drug dealer.", he stated.

"Tyree don't act like you didn't used to be in the game. You're full of shit. All this shit coming to my family for what?", Mrs. Jackson pointed a finger at my dad as tears escaped her eyes.

"Money. I'm getting paid five times more by Darrien to make sure y'all are off the grid and I-"

"He's dead dad."

My statement came out like music to my ears, but screeching to his. Money is dead.

"Says who?", he questioned, looking me over.

"Yeah, after he choked me half way to death, and held a gun up to my head, I witnessed him drop down into a painful death with a bullet to the back of his head. Your little boss man is a dick!", I yelled out. "All this time you've been working for him after he's threat to make me leave with him after graduation and set their family up so they could lose everything they have! You had the audacity to help him!"

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about!"

"He threat to kill me dad! I'm your daughter, how could you!", I yelled as the tears began to drop again.

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