Feel Alive(Adopted By Mikey Way)

21~Mikey & Shallan

Gee and I pull into the driveway. Mom called and told us that Shallan was at their place, so Gee and I dropped off our bags and went to get her. In the house Shallan is laying on the couch with her feet over the back of it and her head hanging off the edge. When I open the door she looks up.

"Mikey!" she almost yells. She flips over, lands on her feet and comes to give me a hug. She bounces the entire time.

"Hi, Shallan."

"Did you have fun?" she keeps bouncing.

"Yeah. Are you okay?"

"I'm wonderful!" She spins in a circle and then slips and lands on her butt. Mom and Dad have wood floors and she's wearing socks. She giggles and tries to stand up. She slips again.

"Seriously what happened to you?"

"She finished the left over frosting for me. She's a little hyped up on sugar." Mom says stepping out of the kitchen.

"I see."

"Yeah. Apparently she doesn't have sugar often."

"I miss Patrick." Shallan says and pouts. Now she's lying spread eagle on the floor.

"Well you'll see Patrick in a few weeks. Can you please move?" she stands up and jumps over the back of the couch.

"Shallan please don't do that again." Mom says.

"Sorry, Donna." She giggles again and goes back to the position she was in when we first walked in. I walk down the hall and go to the bathroom. When I come back out Gee is giving Shallan a piggy back ride around the living room.

"Go faster. You're so slow." Shallan complains and hits Gee's shoulder. He goes a bit faster, but not a whole lot.

"You're no fun." she hops off his back and runs down the hall. 

"Note to self: Never give Shallan that much sugar ever again." Mom says, laughing.

"Obviously." I walk into the kitchen. About three dozen cookies are laying on the table. all of them frosted with bright colors. I grab one and take a bite out of it.

"No more. Those are for the Christmas party." Mom tells me. I nod and walk out. Shallan is doing jumping jacks and Gee is counting for her.

"Hi Mikey." Shallan says. She stops jumping and throws herself onto the couch. I sit down next to her and she puts her feet in my lap. Gee decides to start a movie. We sit in silence watching the movie for about half an hour. And then decide we should leave. The drive is silent. When we get to my building I look back at Shallan and notice she's asleep. I get out and gently pick her up. I carry into the apartment and down the hall to her room. The entire bed is covered in sheets of paper. I lay her down on the edge of the bed, which is the only clean part, and start picking them up. The first one I pick up reads,

"Hold on, hold on, hold on," they said,
"You're a dandelion in the breeze
Look what the winds of change have done
To all the autumn leaves."

"Hold on, hold on, hold on,
This big wide world is not for you
Hold on for long enough
For the last gust to dance on through."

So I held on, held on, held on
They said that's how you know you're strong
But not until I'd wilted
Did I notice something wrong

I thought holding on was bravery
But when winds of change do blow
Sometimes it's even braver
To let go, let go, let go.

-S. C. W.

She also drew a dandelion on the bottom of the page. I stack all the papers and put them on the floor beside the bed. Shallan rolls over, buries her face in the pillow. I put a blanket over her and walk out, closing the door behind me.

Shallan's POV

+Her dream+

Felix and I are running from that horrid woman and her boyfriend. Felix is gripping my hand tightly. We run through alleys and through parking lots. We spot a small one story building. The front door has a sign that says 'Homeless Shelter. Free shelter to those in need' We start to cross the street. We get about half way when a car comes racing down the street directly towards me. Felix pushes me out of the way. The car hits him.

"No! Felix!" I yell and run to his side. In stead of driving the car parks. The driver gets out. It's Patrick. He's smiling.

"How could you!" I yell.

"If I hadn't you might never have gone to care home and then we wouldn't meet." Patrick says with a shrug. He's got a creepy, sinister smile on his face.

"I HATE YOU!"

"No you don't. You love me. Don't you Shallan?"

"I HATE YOU. I FUCKING HATE YOU!" I yell as I clutch Felix's lifeless body to me. Patrick kneels next to me.

"You don't hate me. You could never hate me." He reaches out to touch me. I slap his hand.

"I only did this to make you happy." he tells me.

"YOU THINK KILLING MY ONLY LIVING FAMILY WILL MAKE ME HAPPY?!" He nods.

"YOU ARE COMPLETELY CRAZY!"

"Do you actually believe that?" he asks.

"Shallan!" someone else yells. Patrick reaches out to touch me again. Again I slap him.

"Shallan!" my body starts shaking. "Shallan!" my eyes pop open.

I sit up, wide eyed. Mikey is kneeling beside the bed, both his hands on my shoulders.

"Are you ok?" Mikey asks. I nod.

"I-I think so." I lean against him and he wraps his arm around my shoulder.

"Did you have a nightmare?" he asks. I nod.

"Can you tell us what your nightmare was about?"

"I was running, with Felix. He got hit by the car, then the car stopped and the driver got out. It was Patrick. He said basically what you said in my last nightmare. About how he did it because if he didn't we would never meet. How he did it to make me happy." A few stray tears slide down my cheeks. I wipe them away.

"It was just a dream." Mikey rubs my shoulder.

"I know. I know. I just-I can't-" I don't even know what to say.

"It's okay." I nod. Inspiration hits me. It always does at the worst times. I look around. All my papers are gone. I look down over the edge of my bed and there they sit in a nice neat stack. I grab a piece of paper and a pen and start writing.

"Whatcha writing?" Mikey asks, trying to look over my shoulder.

"None of your beeswax." I reply and hide the paper from his eyes. He rolls his eyes.

"Are you really ok?" he asks.

"Uh-huh. I'm fine. I promise."

"If you say so." I nod. He nods and then we just sit there in silence.

+++++

 So a couple chapters ago I asked for song suggestions and I would really like some. So comment your favorite song(s) and I will give them a listen and tell you what I think. Also vote please. Thanks!

Savannah:-)