We were about three minutes away from my home. A place that I didn't wanna be if Josh couldn't stay. All of this felt like a dream, a dream that wasn't fun, but had its perks.
"Josh?" I asked.
"Yea ty?" He whispered.
"Are you gonna make the efforts to see me? I really don't want you to leave me".
I grabbed his hand and held it as tight as i could. My eyes didn't leave his until I had a response. We came to a stop sign and he looked in his mirror before looking at me, making sure nobody was behind us. He tightened his grip on my hand too.
" Tyler I'm never going to leave you. I'll always be around you whether you realize it or not. You are my everything, do you get that?"
The fading sunset glistened on his face along with the dark spots in the car that showed half of his beaitful features.
"You make that sound so weird. But I get it, I get you" I smiled.
He stared at me for a couple of minutes before pulling off and heading down the road. I rested back and let myself slip away from reality until I needed to be awoken by it in a couple of minutes. **** "I'll talk to you later okay? I'll check in on you and call you. Y'know, the things boyfriend's do" he laughed.
"Okay. I love you josh"
His fingers caressed my face and down to my lips, running his thumb over them.
"I love you too tyler"
I took his hand and kissed it, taking one last look in his eyes before getting out. I walked up to the porch and tunred around as he waved goodbye out of the window. The feelings of this moment being the last scared me. And I didn't understand why I felt like that. I waved back and watched as he left the driveway and down the road. I took a deep breath in and turned to walk in the house. My mom was sitting on the couch as usual when she has nothing to do with her life, but it surprised me when she shot me a smile.
"Why are you so happy?" I asked.
"Well I'm not entirely happy, I'm just happy to see you" she said.
"Wait, did you say you were happy to see.. me? Your own son? What a shocker!"
She stood up, slightly rolling her eyes and followed me as I was heading to put my hoodie in the closet. She placed herself right beside me sort of, so that I could get a good look at her and she could look at me. For some reason, her face seemed lighter. Like she was almost glowing. It took me minute to really see if she was wearing make up or not.
"I'm really sorry tyler. I'm sorry for all the stress that I put you under. I never meant to do that and I truly want you to know that these words are sincere. At some time right now, you're going to open your eyes and see that all of this was a dream. I promise".
I was highly confused and full with weird thoughts. Her words made me cringe, but then again I could actaully feel love from them. What was she doing? And what did she mean by me opening my eyes and relaizng things?
"I think you need to lay off the drinking don't yuh think?" I said, almost in a smarty tone. I walked away and headed to the kitchen to get something to drink before finding something to do.
"Tyler please! I'm being serious. I need you to listen to me, just do this once darling".
I turned around and looked at her. I was scared to open myself up and see what she was really talking about.
"Can you just tell me what it is? You're really starting to worry me".
She looked down at my arm, fright shinning on her face as she was probably remembering what happend.
"I'm gonna go take a shower and get ready for bed. Okay? I love you tyler. I really do".
She walked away and headed into her too leaving me in my thoughts. I tried shaking off the feeling sucking up my body, but I knew it would stay around. I grabbed a water and headed upstairs as quickly as I could. When I reached my room, I thought about taking my bandages off, but I was too afriad to go in the bathroom and do it. So that only meant that i would be skipping out on a shower tonight. I opened my door and rushed over to my bed. The only thing that I wanted to do was sleep on my problems. But only the weak people who no longer had any meaning towards life do that. I layed on my bed, pulling my phone out to text josh.
Me: my mom is acting very weird, but isn't that the normal? Anyways, I'm still alive and fine.. for now
Not even four seconds went by that he responded back, making me smile.
Josh: all moms act weird ty. You'll always be fine and still alive, if you have me! Don't say that.
I laughed a little and set my phone down in the process. I've been thinking to much today and all these other days that I seriously wanted to blow my brains out. I decided to get up and out on my pajama pants so I could get out of these right jeans. It was a struggle to unbutton them considering only one hand would work, without hurting the other. But I successfully got them off and slip the other pants on. I took my shirt off, exposing myself to the cold air in my room. I went to sit back on my bed and examined the bandages on my arm. I didn't want anything getting infected so I started unraveling it. When it finally came off the results look way better than what I imagined it to be. The exposed and open skin that I remembered it to be was sewn up and no longer seen. A wave of relief flushed over me as I felt better about it.
"Coward"
I froze as I heard his voice. I was honesty tired of hearing it, but I wasn't gonna let him have his admirable ways.
"I'm not listening to you anymore. You've done enough harm to everyone".
"Well isn't that the whole point? Evilisn'tnicestupid! Haven't you learned that by now?"
"Whatever" I harshly spoke.
I got up and grabbed the remote from my night stand so I could block out his voice with the t.v.
"You think that's gonna keep my away? Listen, I'll an gone sooner than you know it. But not from yourhead or yourhair. The only thing im here for is to know what's on yourmind so I can use it against you".
I squinted my eyes so that I couldn't listen to him. I grabbed the remote and headed to my bed. I placed myself under the cold sheets and snuggled into them, almost making if freel like Josh was behind me. I needed his comfort.
"Just leave me alone. Please."
"No".
As soon as he said that, he as pratcially gone. I was left in my own silence. The time showed on the TV before the show's popped up saying it was now eight o'clock at night. I calmed myself down so that I could get ready for bed. It was such a long day full of thrills and disappointments.
W: things to remember. 1. "Glowing" 2. "Always be here" 3. "I'll be gone sooner than you think" I'M SO READY FOR THIS PLOT TWIST I STG!!!!! XJSJSKSKZIZKAND*÷*"*#£@?@¥(
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When someone says that Tyler tops and josh dosen't...
