The Chase

The Chase Ch. 15

Thad's P.O.V

It was so hard, but I turned my back and walked away from her. Even though every part of my body told me to stay and fight for her, I knew she needed space. I found a room away from everyone and collapsed against the wall, burying my face in my hands. I heard Donovan approaching, but I didn’t move. I almost thought I couldn’t. I knew he was about to fire at me when I sensed how pissed off he was, but I didn’t care. He didn’t hesitate to shoot me once in the chest. I just lifted my head and looked up at him, ignoring the pain.

“What did you do to Ginger?” he shouted at me, “Why is she so scared?!”

When I didn’t say anything he jerked me up the wall by my shirt and met my eyes without blinking.

“Huh?” he hissed through gritted teeth.

“She saw me…” I said, not looking at him, my voice just barely a whisper.

“What?” he said, sounding a little confused but still pointing his gun at me.

I looked into his eyes, “killing the vampire that attacked her. She saw me.” He didn’t say anything, and I wondered what he was thinking.

“She won’t come near me, she won’t let me touch her, and she can barely look at me,” I continued, the words spilling out of my mouth before I even thought about what I was saying, “So go ahead and shoot me. Fill me up with your bullets. It’s not like it’ll kill me. I jumped from ten stories up once, and I didn’t even come close to dying. So shoot me, I’m a monster and I deserve it.”

“Wait,” he stopped me, his grip slacking a little bit, “She’s mad because you killed something that tried to kill her?”

“No, because I was killing him like an animal.” I slumped out of his grasp.  He just stared down at me, playing nervously with his gun.

“I was… I was just so angry! I did what you told me, and…and he tried to kill her, he tried to kill Ginger! I couldn’t let him get away with that, and it just pissed me off and I lost control and…” I didn’t even know if what I was saying made sense, “And why do you even care?”

He let all the air that had built up in his lungs out in one loud breath and sank to the floor beside me.

“Because I care about her to,” he said, almost sounding defeated. I watched with surprise as he dropped his gun to the floor, his hand falling limp.

“I can tell,” I said simply, “Do you think she should hate me?” He stared at the wall for a while and then slowly shook his head.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, Bloodsucker, but no, I don’t think she should hate you. I understand she’s scared, but I don’t think she should hate you, and I really don’t think she does.” He said with a laugh, but not the kind of laugh you use when you’re happy, the bitter, almost painful kind.

I smiled, almost amused the fact that we were here, talking to each other. Not only were we not trying to kill each other, but we were almost acting like friends. Maybe Donovan wasn’t such a hotheaded ass, maybe he was just jealous. Maybe he was happy he didn’t need to be jealous anymore. He was a thousand times better for Ginger then I could ever hope to be, but I still refused to let her go. I wanted to hold on until I was forced to let go.

“I’ll go see if she’s ready for me to talk to her,” he said, suddenly breaking the thick silence that had formed, “Just stay here, and I’ll tell you whether she wants you gone or not.”

I watched him as he walked away, and disappeared around the corner. I knew exactly where he was headed, because I knew exactly where Ginger was. I could pinpoint exactly where she was in the house, and I could feed off every emotion she felt, and wondered if she could do the same with me. Even if she was surrounded by a million other human’s, I could find her in less than a second. I’d protect her with my life.

But I was a monster.

I could rip another vampire to shreds with my bare hands. Only a monster can do things like that, even if it is for someone they love.

“Thad…” I looked up to see Emma, the female I didn’t know very well. There was something almost sad about the way she looked at me, even though she kept her distance. I looked up at her, still feeling despondent.

“I overheard, and I’m sorry about Ginger….and having to lose part of your family.” She said, with a little consoling smile, “I know how it is to hurt someone you love.”

“My sister,” I shook my head, wondering if my sister really was dead “Is not my family. We may share the same bloodlines in our veins, but we’ll never be family. Thank you, for the kinds words though.”

“You’re welcome, I can tell you care for her,” she said warmly.

“I think I love her,” I breathed mostly to myself as she walked away, leaving me alone again.

I wondered if Ginger would tell me to leave. Remembering the way she looked at me outside, I thought it seemed inevitable. She had looked at me with such fear stricken eyes, filled with the certainty that I would kill her. She told me this was who I really was, a monster, an animal, and a killer. The real Thad, with the cold, dark eyes.

I was sure she would want me gone.

And then I remembered the bond we shared, and how it tied us together. I knew if I left she’d be more miserable without even wanting to consciously be. She’d ache for me, just as I ached for her, even if she wanted nothing to do with me. I had her trapped.

I thought to the few good memories we had shared in the short time we’d known each other so far. The times I’d felt the warmth of her skin, the steady beating of her heart. The couple of times I’d had the pleasure of tasting her blood, the pure essence of her life. I thought to the hand full of times we’d kissed and every time she’d been even near me. It didn’t seem like enough.

I thought about her bright eyes and her sweet, yet determined smile.

And, as I sorted through the memories, playing them over and over in my mind, I even found myself thinking myself into a sound sleep.

The first time I had been asleep in nearly sixty years.