Suspended Butterfly

Chapter 12

Before I could turn away from the door, it opened to reveal a very surprised Harry.

“Hey, you okay?”

“Fine. I have to go.”

“But I thought we were going to hang out before we go on.” He asked taking a step closer to me after I took one back.

“Yeah and I thought I could trust you.”I whispered before turning away as tears began filling my eyes.

“You can trust me.” He grabbed my wrist turning me back round to face him.

“How can I trust someone who just voiced every single thought that goes through my head?” I yanked back my arm wiping the tears that had already begun falling down my face to look him back in the eye. “Everything that you just said in there is everything that floods my mind when I’m alone, when I have no distractions. You know what hurts the most though, you force yourself to believe that you’re only broken in your head, that it’s something that your mind is making up to fuck with itself but no you just came along and said it all out loud. Glad to know I’m not the only one that thinks I’m too damaged to date you or too fucked up to even consider it.” I left him there speechless, turning on my heel heading straight for my brothers dressing room.

When I entered all I could hear were soft whispers coming from a separate little room that really only consisted of a small couch and a plug socket. I knew Luke would be in there, considering that as soon as we had arrived at the venue he had claimed it as his space only. Seriously I think that he’s still a child. As I walked over to the room I had enough time to make sure it wasn’t so obvious that I had been crying before looking into the small room to find Luke on his laptop with his back towards me. I noticed he was skyping someone, before I heard her voice.

“Come on Lukey, she’s making it up! Just like she did last time.” Ashleigh’s sickly sweet voice came through the computer screen.

“Ash, you know I want to believe you but I caught you last time! And I’ve seen the messages this time. What is it that you have against her?” Luke replied running his hands through his hair stressfully. She sat in silence.

“So you’re not going to say anything. Typical.” Luke scoffed.

“What do you mean typical? I don’t have anything against her other than she always gets between us and she’s lying about all this nonsense.” She folded her arms across her chest.

“1. She doesn’t get in between us we were fine before you pushed her away when I was back home and second she’s not lying and you down right know it!” Luke huffed again before sighing and taking another approach. “Why do you always do this? Every time we start getting somewhere with us, you go ahead and start tormenting my sister.”

“She’s not so little miss innocent as you think she is.” She scoffed looking at me in the background. That’s when I decided to interject before Ashleigh went on to tell Luke about him. I coughed slightly getting Luke’s attention.

“So is everyone going to talk about me behind my back today or…” he looked at me confused before realising he had been caught.

“Thanks Ashleigh. Bye.” He closed down his laptop before spinning round to face me trying to explain.

“I don’t want to hear it Luke. I asked you to leave it.” I sighed beginning to leave the room.

“Yes and I said I could’ve helped. You think I was just going to sit back and not say anything.”

“Actually no. I didn’t but I thought maybe you wouldn’t say anything to her and instead just sit there and moan on, like you usually do.”

“I’m sorry okay but I couldn’t just…”

“Just mind your own business? Just keep out of my life for once? You know when that umbilical cord was snipped it meant that we weren’t supposed to be joined at the hip.” I sighed heavily before trying to leave the room again.

“Is it so bad to worry about my little sister?” I almost through the door at him with how hard I pulled on it after that.

“I AM NOT YOUR LITTLE SISTER!! I AM THE SAME AGE AS YOU; I CAN MAKE MY OWN DECISIONS JUST LIKE YOU CAN!!! YOU DON’T SEE ME STICKING MY NOSE IN YOUR BUISNESS DO YOU? SO STOP POKING YOURS IN MINE!!!!” I was full out shouting now deciding that I had had enough with boys and my brother I stormed out looking through my phone for the local taxi number to take me back to the hotel.

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It was around 11:00pm when I was found lying in a grassy patch next to the swimming pool. I could see out of the corner of my eye Harry slowly lowing himself to join me, once he was comfortable there were a few moments of silence before I spoke up.

“What are you doing here Harry?” I asked refusing to take my eyes off the night sky

“You went missing, everyone was looking for you.”

“I texted mum, how did you find me?”

“I remember you said when you couldn’t sleep you would look at the stars.” I hummed lightly before he decided to continue. “I’m sorry, i…”

“Don’t. Just please don’t say anything.” He sighed slightly.

It was silent for a while as we both continued looking up into the sky; it reminded me of the first week I was on tour with the boys in who knows where. How Harry and I had sat under the stars all night looking up and telling stories. How different I was.

“It’s strange you know,” He nodded for me to continue turning his face to look at me. “A month ago I thought I was fine that I had moved on somehow. I was so confident in who I was and now, now I just want to go home.” Tears slowly fell from my eyes again.

“You don’t mean that.”

“Yes I do because if I could wish on a star like we did a month ago I would wish I never came, that me and him had never happened and that we never happened.” I gestured to both of us. “That way I wouldn’t have to wake up in the morning and nearly double over from the pain in my chest when I see him. I wouldn’t keep having constant arguments with my own brother who to be completely honest I just miss being my brother instead of some protector and you, well if you had never happened I wouldn’t keep making a complete fool out of myself and embarrassing myself in front of the world.”

“What do you mean?”

“Have you not seen the news, Mr Styles? I’m your latest conquest.” I turned to look him in the eye as he shrunk back slightly seeing my hard glare on him.

“I’m sorry, but they always make that stuff up. You know that right.” He reached out for my hand squeezing it slightly.

“I know still doesn’t mean the world won’t believe it.” I sighed squeezing his hand slightly

“Here.” He handed me a small piece of card from his back pocket.

“What is it?” I asked turning the card over to see a number printed on the back with his signature underneath.

“It’s my number to give to that girl.” I looked confused for a second. “Nothing like what you’re thinking, when or if she calls me I’ll sort her out. Something along the lines of you’re a nice girl but hell no.” I giggled at the last part.

“She won’t stop calling till you say yes.”

“Separate phone.” He pulled me into a hug “See all planned out and as for you going home that’s not happening because I’d miss you too much and Luke would kill you.”

“Thanks for reminding me.”

We were silent for a while just enjoying the cuddle.

“I am sorry by the way.”

“I know.” I whispered before leaning up and kissing him softly

“What’s that for?”

“Just a thank you.”

“Kayles…” Harry then loosened his grip around my waist and gestured to the door way of the pool to see the last glimpse of him.