Alyssa's Second Chance [Completed]

8-It's Enough

An urgent meeting invite from Amir put a damper on my Sunday night.  I planned to spend this morning working from home.   Instead, I am driving into the DNT parking garage at 5:30 in the morning for an early meeting with Amir.   I can't believe that he would schedule a meeting with me at 6 am.  It makes me wonder about the goal of the meeting. 

After our conflict on Friday, he might have scheduled the early meeting to try to force me to resign before the rest of the staff arrives for the day.   If that's his plan, he'll be disappointed.  I don't back down from a fight and he doesn't have the power to fire me.    

Besides, I know that he hasn't even talked to my manager.  She left for a two-week cruise last week and she doesn't have any cell service on the ship.    So, he can't complain to her until she gets back. 

I make my way to the office listed on the meeting invite.  There is light showing through the door, but the rest of the office seems deserted.  I am about a half hour early and I hope to catch Amir unprepared.  It's part of my strategy this morning.  I'm sure that he expected me to look frazzled and nervous but got up extra early to look polished and professional.    I won't let him have the upper hand. 

I knock on the door and he invites me into his office.   I open the door and sitting behind the desk is a very different looking Amir from Friday.  He is still handsome, but tension is written all over his face.  He has dark circles under his eyes and it looks like didn't sleep at all last night.  His hair is disheveled and he has more than a light five o'clock shadow.  The top two buttons of his dress shirt are unbuttoned and his tie hangs loosely around his neck.  He walks around his desk and sits on the top facing an empty chair.  He motions for me to take a seat and says, "We have something important to discuss."

"Is this about last Friday?" I blurt out.  "If that's the reason for this meeting, you could have scheduled it for a more reasonable time.  I don't appreciate being summoned at this time of the morning without any explanation."

I expect to see anger when I look in his eyes, but I find only sorrow.  "No, what happened last week doesn't matter.   I need your help.  Yesterday, I received a call from Emily Daniels.  Geoff passed away."

The weight Amir's words hit me and my eyes instantly began to water.  "How did he die?" I ask. 

"Geoff had pancreatic cancer.  It's the real reason that he announced his retirement a few months ago, but he didn't want anyone at work to know.  He originally planned to work a few more years and then spend his time traveling the world with Emily, but it didn't work out that way."  I see tears threatening to spill from his own eyes as he continues, "Our CEO selected me as his replacement and then he kept Geoff on the payroll to work on the transition and act as my mentor after I took on the role.  He has been too sick to do much work, so I have been covering everything for the past couple of months.  Emily has been dragging him to specialists all over the country, but there weren't any good options.  Last week, Geoff was enrolled in hospice care.  He knew that he had limited time and he wanted to spend the rest of his life at home with Emily.  We thought he would have at least six more months, but it all happened so quickly."

I feel a tear slide down my cheek.  Amir leans forward and brushes it away with his thumb.  I try to suppress a sob, but it escapes my mouth and he pulls me into a tight embrace.  His warm body, the spicy scent of his cologne and the pressure of his arms give me comfort. 

For a moment, we both hold on to each other like our lives depend on it.  Then, he begins to speak in a low gravelly voice, "I needed to meet with you this early because I need to make an announcement to all of our employees in North America.  I have to make the announcement before employees hear rumors of his death.  It's already 9 a.m. on the East Coast and we need to act quickly.  I tried to reach out to Julie yesterday, but I understand that she's on vacation and you are covering for her.  So, I need you to help me come up with a communication plan for all of North America."

My heart hurts, but I can tell that he is hurting more.  He isn't the same guy I met on Friday.  As much as that version of Amir made me furious, I would do anything to have him in front of me.   Instead, I have this Amir that seems defeated and broken.  I understand the pain of grief.  I want to make things as easy for Amir as possible.  He shouldn't have to take care of me.  I need to help him through this.

I break the embrace, but take his hand and look into his eyes.  "We need to have grief counselors on call and available for employees.  I'll call the vendor we use and set that up.  Then, we need to schedule a conference call with our most senior leaders in each office and break the news to them first.  Once leadership has been notified and understands the plan, we will send out a video message to all of the employees notifying them of Geoff's passing.  After the employees are notified, we will need a few key executives to contact Geoff's personal clients.  Then, we will prepare a press release.  I know it's going to be hard but, we'll do this together."

I see a flicker of relief pass through his eyes.  "Thank you.   I honestly didn't know where to start.  I've made lots of announcements in my career, but nothing like this.  I feel horrible that I'm not in New York.  I didn't get to say goodbye to Geoff.  I'm not there to help Emily.  I can't even make the announcement in person to the New York staff.  They were all like a second family to Geoff and now they are going to feel abandoned.  I'm always the person to resolve issues and fix problems, but in this case, I can't think clearly.  It just seems surreal."

I lightly squeeze his hand.  "I know, but you just need a little help.  I'll be there every step of the way.  We can even record the video announcement together.  I won't make you do any of this alone.  Once the announcements are made, we'll book you a flight back to New York to be with Emily.   This is probably one of the hardest days of her life and she's going to need you as much as you need her."

Only someone who has experienced that level of grief understands what it's like to lose your other half. You can't prepare yourself for those types of feelings. You have to work through them yourself. If you are lucky, you'll have loved ones there to support you while you work through the shock and pain.

Emily won't ever be the same.   The hole that death leaves in your heart never seems to heal completely.  It does get smaller with time.  Maybe, someday it will be small enough for her to face growing old alone. Maybe, she can live the rest of her life without her soulmate and learn that a life surrounded by family and friends is enough. It's not perfect, but it's enough.