Alyssa's Second Chance [Completed]

12-Time to Bite the Bullet

I was thankful that the driver got me to the airport in record time and I was able to breeze through security due to my lack of luggage. I ran to the gate just as the attendant announced that they would begin boarding the last group of passengers.

As I got into line for boarding, my cell phone began ringing. Pulling it out of my purse, I noticed Amir's name on the screen. I sent the call to voicemail and handed the attendant my boarding pass. My phone began ringing again. My head is in a fog. I am physically and emotionally exhausted and I don't think I have it in me to talk with Amir about everything that happened today. As I find my seat, the phone rings again and I send the final call to voicemail and turn off my phone.  

I sleep for most of the flight and wake up hours later as we are preparing to land in San Francisco. I feel slightly better after a little rest, but it doesn't take long for me to remember the events of the day. What was I thinking? Drinking with Amir in his bedroom, letting him tuck me into his bed for a nap and spending so much time alone all lead to my current problem. Amir kissed me and as wonderful as it felt, it can never happen again.

He probably thinks I am going to fall at his feet like all of the other women in the office. It's so obvious that he is only nice to me when he needs something. He starts off being a complete ass to me during our first meeting. Then, he turns things around when he needs help after Geoff dies. Next, he ignores me for almost a week. Finally, he acts like this sweet, gentle guy at the reception. He was probably looking for a distraction and figured that he could shower me with affection and I would gladly sleep with him. He even asked me to change my flight and stay the night. All of a sudden, I feel anger rising up inside of me. I am so stupid. Why didn't I see it sooner?

This is exactly why you don't get involved with co-workers regardless of their sex appeal. Well, it doesn't matter. I am officially on vacation and I am not going to deal with him for the next two weeks. Maybe by the time I get back, I'll know what to do next.

Thankfully, the drive home is fairly easy and I get home pretty quickly. When I arrive, I find my boys in their beds. Alex, Liz and the girls fast asleep in one of the guest rooms. With everyone tucked in, I head up to my room for a few more hours of sleep.

Remembering that my phone is still off, I pull it out of my purse and power it on. As soon as my phone updates, an avalanche of voicemails and texts come through. All of them are from Amir. The message is always the same, "We need to talk. Call me as soon as you get my message."   It sounds like an order and not a request. I refuse to play his game. Instead, I take a shower and go straight to bed.

The next morning, my cell phone starts ringing at six a.m. The caller ID shows that Amir hasn't given up his quest to get me on the phone. I send his call to voicemail, but he doesn't give up easily. I turn off the ringer on my phone and head down to the kitchen to start my day.

Luckily, Liz is in the kitchen feeding one of the twins when I get downstairs. As much as I love Alex, I don't want to discuss Amir with him. I put my phone on the counter and start pulling out ingredients for French toast. Liz raises an eyebrow at me as she watches Amir's name appear on my phone screen.

The calls don't stop and finally, Liz asks, "What's going on with you and Amir?"

"Oh, Liz. Everything's just a mess and it's partially my fault." I confess in an embarrassed voice. Then, begin filling Liz in on all of the events that took place after Liz and Alex left for the airport. I tell her everything, but I swear her to secrecy. Alex is my biggest protector and I can't afford to create friction between Alex and Amir. I just need things to get back to normal.

Liz stares at me for a moment. "Have you ever thought that he isn't trying to be a jerk? Maybe, he's just not good with women?"

After listening to that ridiculous comment, I burst out laughing. I look at Liz and she starts chuckling too. I nearly let a snort escape as I say, "Did you see him? Does he look like he would have problems with women?"

"Ok, here's my advice. Talk to him sooner rather than later. Clear the air before things escalate. Before you talk to him, decide what you want. Is your relationship strictly professional? Do you want to try to be friends? Are you interested in him? Do you want to see where things would go romantically with him? You need to think about what you want, but don't take too long. Call him back by the end of the weekend."

Its good advice, but I dread having a conversation with him. "Ok, I will be dropping my mom and the kids off at the airport tomorrow afternoon. I will give him a call when I get back."

The rest of the Saturday goes by quickly. It takes about twenty missed calls, but eventually, Amir gets a clue and stops calling me. Saturday is spent getting the kids ready for their trip. Next thing you know, I am dropping my mom and the kids off at the airport and fighting off tears as they enter security. I wave goodbye and walk out of the airport. It's going to be an agonizing week to be without the kids, but I know that it's for the best.

As I get back to my car, I receive a text from Amir. It's different from his previous messages. He insists that it is work related and asks me to please call him back. It's time to bite the bullet.