Alyssa's Second Chance [Completed]

21-The Plan

Walking into the historic venue, I am amazed at the transformation from the empty building that I toured a few months ago.  The cold white walls have been warmed by lighting and the interior of the building has been filled with bright linens and lounge furniture, extravagant floral displays and elaborate ice sculptures.  My staff and our event vendors brought my vision to life and the party seems nothing less than magical.   The event has just begun, but the size of the crowd is already huge and the room is buzzing with excitement.   

Amir places his hand on the small of my back and gently guides me through the crowd.  I can't hide my smile.   I feel this undeniable force pulling us closer.   For just a moment, I let myself think about being Amir's date.  I don't think about an evening where it's my job is to introduce him to people and make sure he works the room.  What would it be like to be with him without hiding behind that wall of professionalism?  What would be it be like to explore the chemistry between us, if our circumstances were different?  

A small tap on my shoulder brings me out of my thoughts and back to the present.  I turn to see Alex and Liz behind me.   I give them both big hugs.  Amir exchanges handshakes with Alex and then returns his hand to the small of my back.    I'm sure that the movement is less than obvious, but Liz has eagle eyes and she smiles and winks at me. 

Liz takes a moment to admire the room and then turns her focus back to me.  "The gala is beautiful this year.  You did a wonderful job.  I'm glad you came to enjoy the result of your hard work."

"I just oversee the event.  I had a whole committee and dozens of vendors who helped me pull this off.  You know I don't do it on my own any longer."  I still spend a lot of time working on the gala, but I don't do it all myself.  The year that David died, I struggled to delegate gala responsibilities while dealing with my shock and grief.  It was a disaster, but my team managed to salvage the event.  I learned to lead the effort instead of doing everything myself and to always have a backup plan. 

"You're just being modest.  You might have some help, but I see a little bit of your brilliance in every corner of the room."  She smiles and turns to her husband.  "Alex, why don't you introduce Amir to some of your key people while Alyssa shows me around the venue?"

Liz grabs my free hand and leads me away and around a corner into a quiet area.  Once she has me away from the crowds and out sight, she turns to me.  "OK, spill it.   The gala just started a few minutes ago and Amir has his hands all over you.  What's going on between you two?" 

"Honestly, I don't know.   We didn't just meet here as we planned.  We've been together for hours, but it's more than just that."  I quickly catch Liz up on my evening.  She's shocked that I told him about my injury and everything that happened to me during my recovery. 

"Wow.  You didn't tell me your whole teenage saga for years."

"I know.  It's strange.  I keep my skeletons hidden and I carefully control everything.  I don't let people get too close until I can trust them, but with him...."   I think about everything I've told him over the past few weeks and how he makes me feel when we're alone.  "Well, I feel...."

"Oh my god, he snuck past your defenses.  You have feelings for him."  She looks into my eyes and her lips form a smile.  "I'm right, aren't I?"

"It's not what you think.  I'm really attracted to him and I just react to him without thinking.  If he was just another guy, I would have gotten him out of my system by now.  I know it's just lust.  He's just more appealing because he's forbidden.  I work with him and I can't let things go further."  

"So, it's just lust?  Are you sure?"

"Positive."  I'm not really sure that I'm telling her the truth, but that's all I can admit to myself. 

"So, sleep with him," Liz says casually like she's suggesting that we share a cab. 

"What?  You've got to be kidding.  You aren't really serious are you?" 

"Listen, just hear me out.  You've been out with a few guys since David died.  They all had potential.  There was the guy from college, the fellow from the gym and owner of that great pub downtown.   What did they all have in common with you?  Chemistry.  Then, you got to know them intimately and they were a big disappointment.   They couldn't meet your expectations and your lust for them evaporated in minutes.  The sex was shit and you moved on."

I roll my eyes.  "Don't forget Kyle."

"I was in London for that one.  Was he a stud in bed?"

"No, he was just boring and clingy.  He thought that he found a replacement for ex-wife and I had a hard time getting rid of him.  I spent weeks trying to let him down easy.  It's still uncomfortable for me when our kids hang out."

"So, don't let that happen again.  Set the expectations upfront.  Tell Amir that you want to spend one night with him, but that's it.  Whatever happens between you, it's over in the morning and you have to go back to a professional relationship.  No exceptions." 

"I don't know Liz.  It seems like a bad move to cross that line."

"Promise me that you'll think about it.  You deserve to have a little fun and you need to get him out of your system.  This is the best way to do it."