Adopted by who!?

tour

I was told tour started in two days.Two days until all of the hey violet fandom and 5sosfam would know who I was.Two days until I was revealed.Two days of privacy left.Two days till the hate started.

To say i wasn't nervous would be an understatement,I had seen the hate on the band ,I knew that would happen to me.Im not pretty,I'm not talented and I knew they would see it.

On the outside I know the girls and Iain thought I was just excited.Excited to see the world.Excited to explore.Excited to take photos.Excited to see the rest of America.

On the outside i could pretend not to see Casey's glances at me.I could pretend they didn't worry me.I could pretend that they didn't make me feel judged.I could pretend I wasn't hurt by them.

On the inside I was breaking.On the inside I was scared.On the inside I was worried.On the inside I grew more and more weak under Casey's glances unknowing to what he was looking at me for.On the inside I was wearing thin.

I was sitting in the spare room at the Hey Violet house.As there was only two days until tour I hadn't unpacked yet.There was no point.I had sat in the empty room for the past 2 hours .After having dinner last night once we came back from the studio,I had come up to my room and sat on the light blue sheets before falling asleep.The walls were white ,the door white and the drawers and wardrobe were empty.

Staring at white walls can only be interesting for minus 0 minutes, lets face it.So I quickly jumped up running down the stairs my feet thumping against each step at the early hour of 9 am in the morning probably waking up Nia who was closest to the stairs.Before walking to the garage and opening the door, walking in I searched for brushes and paint .There was a shelf with dark blue paint ,purple paint ,silver and baby pink paint.I smiled grabbing two tubs on each arm but failing.

"Need some help there kiddo?"

I looked up seeing Casey in black skinnies a white shirt and blue overshirt.

"Yes please"I smiled .He walked over grabbed two and helped bring them to my room,placing them by the door.I picked up a brush and dipped it into the blue and then ran my hand through it so it splattered the wall then doing the same with the purple and silver,leaving the pink for later.I was actually taking my emotions out in the paint which is why I never noticed I was crying till a teardrop hit my hand.I dropped the brush onto the floor emotionless.

"Zayda ,whats going on ?You can't hide what you're really feeling from me anymore.You can fool the girls and maybe Iain ,but I can see right through you,This stops right now.The lying.Tell me whats wrong"Casey urged from his place up against the dry white wall.

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This feels unfinished so imma do a part two later xxx
Have a good day guys
Thank you all for reading 💜💜💜