Love Vigilantes (Frerard) •AU•

Chapter Nine

Gerard P.O.V

I smiled, as I had left my anxieties tied to the streetlight outside the small grocery store. I had no idea whether or not he'd meet me at my motel room- even though I had hope that he'd eventually have to come back. Seeing as he lived there himself.

I sighed as my car came to a halt outside the motel, the amber liquid inside the whiskey bottle bubbled away to itself. I grabbed it by the neck, slamming the car door shut. The sky screamed rain, but I wasn't too concerned. The thought of going on a long walk in the surrounding woods sounded appealing- apart from the possibility of me getting shot for trespassing. I decided on winging it, knowing that that beautiful young guy wouldn't even dream of showing up at my room. I threw the bottle of whiskey onto my bed, tossing my expensive jacket over it to swap it for an old coat. It had many holes, but I preferred it to the pristine suit that I would wear on a weekly basis.

Locking the door behind me, I slipped my key into the pocket of faded jeans. The knees were faded from their years of wear, there were rips and tears everywhere- yet to my mother's disappointment I refused to throw them out. I had worn them through the best times of my life, and I wasn't planning on doing so.
I took the backroad from the motel, leading to the forest. I had yet to explore all of it, the thought of doing so was too daunting. I needed somebody to explore it with me. To chase through the trees, to gaze up at the stars and laugh with. Instead of this lonely and sorry existence. I stood in puddles, watching the droplets splash up, feeling like a child again. I couldn't help but smile as the heavens opened, and the rain began to fall. Making my neat hair messy and unprofessional.

I grabbed a tree near me, using it to pull me up the small hill. I grunted as the effort I was using to pull myself up was making me tired. I sat at the top of the little hill, admiring my surroundings. I watched the rain bounce off the leaves, the droplets racing down my cheeks. Brushing my hair out of face, I watched the cars pull in and out of the motel's parking lot. Desperately hoping that he would appear. It would've meant a lot to me, having felt so lonely and down as of late.

I sat there for what seemed like hours, just watching the world go by me. The forest made me feel like I was untouched by time, but as the sky grew dark and there was no sign of my little crush. Sighing, cracking my neck, I decided that it was time to get back. I could enjoy my whiskey on my own, and hope that some sort of inspiration would come to my head. I needed it, having been so unproductive at work. I was certain that I would get fired- even though I was the company's best asset.

The mud beneath my feet had turned to mush, and I had to be sure that I was careful where I stood. My jeans became caked with mud, I'd have to take them back home to my parents' house to have them cleaned. I shook my head, knowing that Mikey would cause a scene. As he usually did- I hoped that by the time I did go with all of my laundry he would've moved out. He needed to take at least one leaf from my book, which was to stop being such a child and support himself. To stop being such a freeloader.

I kicked off my boots, tossing my coat onto the floor. I tossed my clothes on top of my coat, settling for just my damp boxers. I grabbed the bottle of whiskey from my bed, twisting the lid off eagerly. I poured some into my mouth, the instant burn satisfying to me. I listened out for his car, which I secretly knew wasn't going to pull into the parking lot. I tried to distract myself from thinking about him. That thought alone upset me more than my own brother turning on me. I didn't blame him for his outburst, I probably did deserve it. I needed to be more truthful with him, but I was still coming to terms with it myself.

After downing almost half of the glass, the world was spinning around me like a merry-go-round. I put down my pen- no, I threw it angrily against the wall. I was slightly angry and disappointed that he hadn't even bothered to show up. His car wasn't parked outside, and I was still lonely. With nobody other than my parents that wanted to know me. Resisting the urge to hurl the glass at the wall and swallowing the pieces, I moved the bottle away from me. There were to sides to drunken me- the reclusive and oddly attractive side, then their was the angry and self-destructive side. I hated that side but somebody always drove me to that edge. The edge of wanting to kill anything in a ten mile radius.

I threw my clean jacket onto my desk- which was swimming in broken pens and crumpled pieces of paper- and climbed into bed. The comfort and warmth of the sheets put my mind at ease. Allowing myself to drift off to sleep.
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Song Of The Chapter- Outside by Catfish and the Bottlemen

A.N
I apologise for being so inactive when it comes to writing updates, but I've been to three Catfish and the Bottlemen concerts in three days- I even got to take pictures of them with photographers. I love them, I really do like I'm mega obsessed again!

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