Bittersweet

Stay in your lane boy

I dragged myself up the stairs, Frank following shortly after.

How did I end up like this?
I said that I never wanted to talk to him again and now I was letting him into my apartment.
Why was I so weak when it came to the black haired troublemaker?

Before I unlocked my front door I let out a sigh.

"Get in", I said when I opened the door.
Frank for once did what I said and got inside, walking right into the living room.

I took my time getting out of my shoes, trying to avoid what was going to happen for as long as possible.

"So what do you want to talk about?", I asked when I had followed Frank into the living room.

"I think you know exactly what we need to talk about.", he answered but I decided to just look at him, waiting for him to keep talking.

"A lot of things happened", he continued.

"Oh really?", I said sarcastically before sighing again, "listen, if you want to talk about the yearbook thing that happened today... that's over."

"Not only today. But... also What happened all those years ago back in school", he looked at the ground, "I'm sorry, Gerard"

I was taken aback.
This was the first time Frank had apologised to me.
The very first time.

And that's probably why I got so angry all of a sudden.

"Oh so you're sorry?", I hissed, "and you think that's it?"

"No, Gee. Please listen-..."

I interrupted him
"No now YOU are going to listen.", I said harshly and shoved him back a bit, "Back then you took everything from me. My first kiss, my virginity, every chance to make friends and sometimes even my will to live. And noe you think a simple apology is going to make things better?"

"But I'm trying to say that-...", he started again

"I don't care what you have to say. I'm not done yet, Frank so shut up for once and let me talk", I growled, "You only ever cared about yourself. You've always been so goddamn selfish and even though I should fucking hate you, I just can't. Maybe I should tell you a secret, Frankie dear, I was so helplessly in love with you in Highschool."

Actually I that's not what I wanted to say but the words just slipped out of my mouth.
And not only I was shocked about my confession, but also Frank who looked at me with wide eyes.

Now that the damage was done, I could also just keep going, right?
Right!

"And do you know what's even worse?", I asked him not expecting an answer, "That even now, after you stepped into my life again and turned everything upside down... I still like you. No, screw that, I fell for you AGAIN."

Admitting it to myself was hard enough.
Saying it out loud now, made me feel sick.

Silence spread through the room and now I was the one looking away.

"Can I say something now?", Frank asked, his voice suddenly softer and more quiet.

I just nodded.

"What if... What if I had feelings too?", he asked.
Now I lifted my head up again and looked at him in confusion.

"What do you mean?", I asked

He rolled his eyes
"You know exactly what I mean. I like you. Like... a lot. And I'm really, deeply sorry for everything that I've done to you. Now and back then.", he said, looking straight into my eyes.

I didn't know what to say.
I felt my whole body get tingly and a wave of heat overwhelmed me.

"Are you... Are you actually serious?", I asked not quite believing what I had just left Frank's mouth.

"Yes I am. You're right, I was stupid and selfish and asshole but I-I... I love you, Gerard and you can't imagine how happy I am to hear the same words from your mouth", he said, a smile on his face.

I just shook my head.
All those years I've hated myself for loving somebody like him and that's how it was going to end?

But did I actually care about that?
Wasn't all that matters that Frank returned my feelings?

"You're such an idiot, Frank", I sighed and ran a hand over my face.
Now he was telling me that he loved me.
Of course I was happy but mostly overwhelmed.
And now it was too late anyways.

"But why, Gee?", Frank made a few steps forward so he was standing right in front of me, our bodies almost touching, "I know that it's hard to believe after all I've said and done to you but please, you have to believe me. I really love you and if that's what it takes for you to believe me I will climb on top of the highest building in New York and scream it out for everybody to hear."

I actually had to giggle a bit as my cheeks turned pink but that moment of euphoria didn't last long.

I looked into Frank's eyes again and even though I never thought that he would be lying to me about something like that, the honesty in his eyes took away any kind of doubt I ever had.
And that only made it worse.

"I believe you, Frank", I sighed

"Then what's stopping us?", he said, smiling at my answer, "We can just be together now. We can run away together we can... Move Somewhere else and start again. Leave the past and what happened here behind!"

He sounded so sure about it.

"No, Frank I can't", I said earning a confused look from him

"But why? Give me a reason", he pleaded.

I looked away again
"Because I'm leaving tomorrow, Frank."

Franks smile disappeared.

*A/N*

Soooooo...
If Everything goes as planned then there are only two more chapters left.

I'm sorry that this is kind of a cliffhanger I'm trying to update again as soon as possible.

I spend a few days designing covers for all the stories I have in mind and after this is done I'm going to let you choose between a few of them so I can start something new.

I hope you had fun reading this story but we're not done yet anyways, as I said, two more chapters left :)

Thanks for reading