In Your Dreams // phan

t h r e e

That's it. I met him. I met the boy I'm going to spend the rest of my life with and he was perfect.

It was exactly like my parents described it. The butterflies in your stomach and the heartbeat in your ears and you can barely breath but oh it feels so good.

I've met people before that I thought might have been it. Yeah she's cute, he's hot, they've got  really good taste in music but that boy- Dan- Dan was it. He was so nervous but it was enamoring. His hand was shaking but it just made me want to hold it more. His grin was forced but it was still the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

I laughed loudly as my feet stilled beneath me, wind whipping in my ears as my bike pulled me down a hill. I felt alive. I felt amazing. I felt fulfilled.

I didn't even want to stop at red lights or stop signs, my need to get home propelling me forward. Because home meant bed, and bed meant sleep, and sleep meant dreams, and dreams meant Dan.

And Dan would be dreaming of me. I wonder what memory he would see. I hoped it was the first time I rode my bike, that was a lot of fun. Or maybe my first birthday, when I had fallen asleep in my cake and singed my eyebrows on the candles. Or, what if it was when I found my first favourite romance novel? He already knew what a helpless romantic I was, maybe he would get to dream of the very origins of my loving nature.

"Mum!" I shouted, the door opening much faster than I anticipated as I burst into my house. She looked up from her laptop, permanent scowl intact as I tripped over myself to take off my shoes, dropping my books in the process.

Once I was finally balanced on two feet, and ran to my mother, kneeling at her feet and taking her hands. "Mum, I'm in love." She blinked slowly, prying her glasses off her face. "Mum, it was just like you said, it was amazing, and I'm going to dream tonight and just... wow, it was so amazing!" She blinked again.

"Philip, I don't want you to get hurt." She recited, turning back to her work.

"I know, mum, I know I say this all the time, but this time it's for real. Mum, he's so amazing you need to meet him. He's the boy I'm going to spend the rest of my life with." I regretted my words as soon as I said them. She smiled, sadly, and looked down to me.

"That's not always true." I nodded and got up, brushing off my knees. "I love you." She called after me.

"I love you too, mum." I went to the kitchen after a quick glance at the time display on the microwave. "What's for dinner?" I asked, opening the cabinets. I knew the answer, of course, but it never hurts to ask.

"Take away's in the fridge." I sighed, setting the bowl back in the cabinet and shutting the door.

"I'll be upstairs." I swung around the banister and quickly trounced up the stairs, ignoring my mum's shouts about finishing my holiday homework. I shut the door quickly behind me, leaning against it and biting my lip.

Gently, like it would crumble apart in my hands if I moved too fast, I reached into my back pocket and retrieved the paper Dan had written his number on. I bit my lips harder to try and suppress the crazy smile that adorned my face, marveling at the smudged pen. He had written his name very small, adding a tiny colon next to the D, making it look like a smiley face. I giggled, running my thumb along the numbers gently, admiring them.

He was right. That 6 did look like an 8.

I pressed the contacts button on my phone and put the number in quickly, remembering with a grimace my habit of losing things. Then, next to his name, I added a heart. Then a question mark. I would know soon enough if this boy was to be mine.

I miss you already :(  I typed, then shut my phone off and flung myself on the bed, the piece of paper still clutched in my hand. It was only six, but I wanted to fall asleep now. Unlike a normal person who would be dreading the startup of school tomorrow, I wanted it to come sooner. I really, really wanted to see Dan again, even if he wasn't my soulmate.

Oh, who am I kidding? He was it. He was the one. If he wasn't, then I would begin to seriously doubt the whole system.

I stared up at the Buffy poster stuck to my ceiling, reminding me that my lights were still on. I sighed, and sat up, figuring the dreams would come sooner or later, regardless of when I actually fell asleep.

I reached under my bed and pulled out binder of holiday homework, attempting to finish what little I had left, but Dan still plagued my mind. I could barely see I was smiling so widely.

So, instead, I smoothed out the paper on top of my maths, tracing my finger along the curling lines of his number.

I grabbed my phone when I heard it buzz, excitedly unlocking it only to find it wasn't a message from Dan, but from my friend PJ, who asked if he could come over tomorrow after school. I typed a quick yes, figuring I could tell him what transpired when we spoke in person, and stared at my message to Dan. Was I too forward? Did I just ruin it?

This is Phil  I sent, figuring that was it. He didn't have my number, so maybe he thought I was someone else. Or maybe he didn't have his phone on him. Or maybe it was dead.

Or maybe he hated me and didn't feel what I felt. Maybe he never wanted to see me again and wished we'd never met. Maybe he has already blocked me and I would never get to see his sparkling eyes and dazzling smile ever again.

I flopped back on my bed, my homework cascading to the floor. You're being paranoid, my brain tried to convince me as I watched the blades on my ceiling fan rotate slowly. It's only been ten minutes since you sent it. Give him some time. Not everyone is excited as you are about this.

They should be. But they're not.

It only took me seven tries until I successfully hit the light switch off with a pencil from my case, darkness enveloping my room as I drew the blinds by my bed. I gripped my phone closely after setting the paper down on my dresser, wondering what Dan was doing that very minute.

My soulmate, I reminded myself. My very own soulmate. With a past and a life and a beating heart who was going to love me forever.

I finally drifted out of consciousness, anxiously awaiting the dreams to come.