A Silly Reason

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A Silly Reason



"Sorry about that whole display out there," James said sheepishly. "I don't normally cry like that. It's usually far more... distinguished looking."

Lily nodded. "Yes, I'm sure you cry very manly tears under different circumstances."

James wasn't sure if she was being sarcastic or not. He had a feeling she was by the way she sort of half-grinned and turned to focus on the thermos she was pouring out. Hot coffee fell into the mugs and she pushed one across the table to him. He picked it up and stared down into it. James didn't usually drink coffee, and the could see the nutmeg she'd shaken in floating about the cup. He didn't know if he liked nutmeg or not - but Lily Evans had made this for him, so it was destined to be his new favourite drink.

He gingerly took a sip.

Lily sat down at the chair across from him at the table and sipped her coffee, too, watching him. "You know, James, it's alright if you cry now and again. Everyone does now and again. Even boys."

"I know," James murmured. He thought of his dad and the great tears he had cried earlier that day. He sighed, "I just don't like you thinking I'm weak."

"Weak?" Lily lowered her mug, "I'd have to be mad to think you were weak, Potter! Crying doesn't mean you're weak, it means that under all that ego and hair and swagger you're a human being with actual feelings." She shook her head, exasperated, "Honestly! James Potter. Weak. That'd be the day!"

The corners of James's lips tweaked up slightly, "Yeah?"

"Yeah. You're obnoxiously strong."

"Obnoxiously strong?" James laughed.

"Yeah, always strutting about, saving the day everywhere, being all James Potter-y," Lily nodded and swiveled her coffee about, "It's sort of nice to see you're not a robot in a skin suit after all."

"Sometimes I reckon it'd be easier if I was," he mumbled. He leaned back in the chair and stared up at the sky. There were a good deal of stars hanging about the moon up there and James ran his hands through his hair. "Then I could power off when things go blue and things like broken hearts would only require a quick run to the shop for repairs." He smiled at the thought of it.

"Careful, you're sounding like a recruitment video for the Cybermen."

James made a sound like the TARDIS, "Vworp, vworp, vworp..."

"Yes precisely, the Doctor will show up and zing you with his sonic screwdriver."

"Not if I don't zing him first," James replied, and he reached for his wand, then laughed, "Well, maybe not, as my wand's upstairs."

Lily shook her head.

James sipped his coffee again.

Lily sipped hers, too.

They stared at one another over the mugs.

When James lowered his, he wiped his mouth with his palm and cleared his throat. "So. So um..." he looked about. "So Sirius told you to come, huh? You gonna... I dunno... write him and tell him how I fractured my wrist and cried and rusted up all my robot parts before you?"

Lily laughed, then, in a serious tone, "I'll write him and tell him you're alright."

"Good. I don't want him to feel like he has to come home. He doesn't. I'll be fine, really."

"And I'm here."

"Yes," James nodded. "Yes you are. You - are here." James stared at her a long moment. "Honestly only half of my believes that even now." He paused as Lily laughed and rolled her eyes and he said, "Tell me, love, does Heaven know they're missing an angel...?"

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