Farm Girl Has Bad Boy (#3)

Chapter Six

“Sorry that took so long,” Emery says, slamming the driver’s truck door. I’ve been sitting in the truck for nearly an hour, although I haven’t exactly been counting the minutes so it could have been longer. I lean my head against the cool window, the right side of my forehead touching the glass. As Emery starts the truck I feel his eyes on me, waiting for the response I’m not going to give. Silence is the best offense.

Emery drives slowly down the road, looking at places that hold memories he isn’t sharing with me. Without me speaking, he chooses not to press for my voice. At least not until we’re almost in Redwood Valley.

“Look, River,” he sighs, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel as we drive through the city. “I get why you’re mad at me and if I were you, I would be too. But can you at least here me out?” I know he’s looking at me again; however I refuse to look away from staring out my window. “It’s going to be a long drive and talking isn’t going to make anything go away.” Its late afternoon and the sun will be setting soon. I’m sure I could sleep the rest of the way home, but my stomach objects as it grumbles for food. “Why don’t we stop to eat and I’ll explain?”

Again I don’t answer, so I assume Emery takes it as a yes. A few minutes pass until he pulls into a rest stop with picnic tables and individual fireplaces. I’m the first one out of the truck, not even bothering to help Emery carry anything. I sit down at a wooden table and rest my chin on my hands.

Instead of making a remark about me not helping with the cooler or bag of food, Emery brings it over without a word and places everything on the table. He starts to unpack it and once everything’s laid out for us to eat, he digs right in. As hungry as I am, I don’t feel like eating. In a way, I’m so upset that I feel sick to my stomach. So as Emery watches me with curious eyes and shoves a plastic wrapped sandwich my way, I refuse to touch it.

“Stop being so stubborn, River,” he groans after he’s finished eating. Again, he pushes the sandwich towards me but I look away instead of even thinking about touching it. “Look.” Emery exhales nosily and leans forward, clasping his hands together. “Alana and I were best friends. She’s lived beside me ever since I was born and her parent’s treated me like a son when my dad would kick me out.” I raise my eyebrows and give him a look when he says best friends. “Just friends, River.”

“Okay,” I snap, folding my arms over my chest. I turn to meet his eyes. “And what’s your excuse for ignoring me and then leaving me, your girlfriend, for over an hour while you went into Alana’s house!” My voice rises with each word and I feel my cheeks flush in frustration. Emery reaches across the table and tries to take my hand and I move it away.

“It was wrong, I get that,” he says defensively, his eyes pleading for my forgiveness. “But you can’t blame me for talking to her the whole time when I went from seeing her every single day to not seeing her for three years.”

I look away, clenching my teeth together. He kind of has a point, however he only gave me one excuse when I sort of asked for two.

“What about leaving me?” I ask bitterly.

“You’re going to hate me if I tell you honestly,” he mumbles, giving a small smile. He gives me a look, willing for me to at least talk to him calmly.

“Do I look like I really care whether I hate you or not?”

Emery bites his bottom lip for a minute before responding. “I forgot.”

“What?”

“I forgot,” mumbles Emery, looking down at the picnic table. “About you.”

Instantly, I jump to my feet and my fists clench at my sides. My stomach grumbles again and I snatch the sandwich before storming off. Emery doesn’t follow, knowing I won’t go far and he’s right. I plop down on the second farthest picnic table and unwrap my food angrily.

While I’m chewing, I glare at Emery who’s smirking at how I’m acting. I have a right to be childish though, after all I’m only seventeen. After I’ve finished my sandwich, I still don’t return to Emery. When he realizes this, he rises to his feet and slowly walks over, hands in his pockets. The orange sun beams down on him, making him appear as if he’s an angel.

“River,” he murmurs, as I slide down as far as I can on the picnic table. Emery gently sits down and gives me a look. “Can I just explain?”

“I thought you already did,” I mutter, folding my arms across my chest and looking away.

“The only reason I forgot you were there is because-“

“I’m easy to forget about,” I snap, interrupting him.

“No,” he sighs, trying to meet my gaze. “Because it’s been so long and it felt like before, when I lived there. The only reason I forgot is because I was back in my natural element and you have to understand all the stress with going back to the house.” I stare at the setting sun and Emery reaches for my hand, which I quickly yank away. “It’s like how it was when I was brought into your natural setting for you. Besides, sometimes you forget about me when you’re with Mary.”

I think about what he’s saying for a few long minutes. I guess I do forget Emery sometimes when I’m with Mary because I’ve been best friends with her my entire life without Emery being around or a part of it. I bite my lip, deciding that he has a point and I should just drop this. I can’t expect him to come to his old house and relive the old memories without the scars to show it.

“So why did you want to come back?” I whisper, still avoiding his eyes. “And why did you want to bring me with you?” This time when Emery takes my hand I let him. Instead of his usual casual grip, he holds my hand tightly as if I can slip from his fingers at any moment.

“Because I love you, River,” he murmurs, brushing my hair behind my ear. As much as I don’t want to, I melt as my cheeks flush. “And I haven’t really talked a lot about my past and I wanted to show you it; to let you in.”

“Why didn’t you ever mention Alana?” I ask softly. “Or anyone?”

“I think you know as well as me why I didn’t bring up the people from my past.” I finally meet my eyes and his are serious, waiting for my response.

“I don’t understand.”

“It’s like how you never talk about Ocean,” he says gently, not wanting to upset me. “Because it hurts to remember.”

I try to push away the tears that desperately want to form in my eyes. When I think about it, my sister rarely even crosses my mind because I’ve pushed her so far away. I haven’t forgotten as the thunder storms won’t allow me to, but even saying her name makes me upset.

“That’s why I haven’t brought up Alana or anyone else.” Emery squeezes my hand for comfort. “Because it upsets me to think about the past when they were such a huge part of my life. I left, River and when I did I left them behind.”

Even though I’m listening to what Emery is saying, my heart is aching as I do my best to keep myself from crying. Ever since the accident, I always thought that I got over my twin and that I’ve moved on with my life. However if I haven’t even thought about her since the last storm and right now remembering her is making me upset, I can’t really say I’ve moved on, can I?

“Emery,” I whisper, staring down at the old wood of the picnic table. “I think there’s a lot more we need to do before the baby’s born.” I mentally add moving on with my life from Ocean to the long list of baby preparation.

“I know, honey,” Emery murmurs, brushing his thumb across my cheek. “And we’ll talk about what we’re going to do soon.”

As we head back to the truck, hand in hand, I question when ‘soon’ really is. Because lately, it seems that Emery is using it as an excuse to put the conversation off yet again and to him, the word soon might really mean never.