Chapter Twenty-Two

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“Come on, Patch,” I sigh, slumping against the bony feeling horse.

“No luck yet?”

I look up over the stall door to see Emery stride in, his hands in his pockets. I shake my head no and he gives me a sympathetic look. He and my dad had left nearly hours ago when they realized this wasn’t going to be a few minute process.

Overall, I’m surprised and slightly offended that Patch allowed me in his stall. He’s been thrashing, stomping and hurting himself whenever anyone went near. However once I stepped into the barn, he instantly smelled Ocean and accepted me, thinking I’m her. But so far, he still refuses to eat.

“He knows what he’s doing,” I explain, gently stroking his neck.

“What do you mean?” Emery asks, resting his arms on the stall and leaning into it.

“I mean he knows that he’s killing himself. He’s depressed.” I move my gaze to the floor, knowing this is my fault. If I had tried to get him out of this rut earlier, maybe we wouldn’t be here right now.

“You should come in the house.” I look up to meet Emery’s worried eyes. “It’s getting late and cold.”

As much as I wish I could, I can’t go inside just yet. I still have to try and save my sister’s horse, even if I’m exhausted, pregnant, and my knees are threatening to collapse. When I shake my head, Emery sighs and slumps against the wood of the stall.

“Maybe you should call Mary,” Emery suggests. He stares at me intently, watching me try to hide my nervous expression. “She deserves to know what’s going on with Patch and maybe she can help.”

I haven’t talked to Mary since the baby shower and so far, she hasn’t tried to talk to me. As much as I want our friendship to work, it’s going to take a long time for the awkwardness and hurt to heal. Besides, if she’s not going to take the higher road and call me, I might as well.

Instead of calling her, I chicken out and send her a text message. After I get her reply that she’s on her way over, I usher Emery out of the barn and tell him to go in the house.

“What’s the big deal?” He asks when I hear the sound of Mary’s dad’s truck on the gravel of County Road Six.

“Just go,” I sigh and he finally shrugs, heading into the house. “Patch,” I murmur, raising the bucket of food towards his head. He rears it up higher and cries, clearly not planning to even smell the food. “Why do you have to do this?” Frowning, I stroke his neck and try to calm him down. “Do you really want to leave me that bad?”

“What’s wrong?” I jerk my head towards the door of the barn. Mary walks slowly towards me, watching Patch as she shoves her hands in her coat pockets.

“He won’t eat,” I explain, moving my eyes to the ground. “He hasn’t in a few days.”

“Oh, Patch,” Mary sighs, leaning over the stall to stroke his head. “Why are you being so silly?” For a brief moment, I watch her eyes drift over to Ocean’s sweater, still wrapped around me. Her eyes grow wide and she steps into the barn. “River,” she whispers sadly. “You didn’t have to do this.”

I shake my head, still not meeting her eyes. “I had to try.”

“You should have told me earlier.” She gives me a sad smile, trying to break the awkward wall between us. “You know I would have come over to help, regardless…” She trails off and I finally look up at her.

“I don’t understand,” I reply quietly, slumping against the side of the stall. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner or tell Emery?” My heart aches in my chest by I try to ignore the wounded feeling.

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