Bruised

chapter fifteen.

I said quietly, but you could hear all the rage in my voice, "fuck you."

I pushed my chair in and walked out of the expensive restaurant, that my boyfriend brought me to, the boyfriend I thought I'd always be happy with, or at least for a while. But he's not my boyfriend, and I will never call him that again.

I was literally a half hour away from my house, by driving, so I knew there was no way I could barely even make it back by midnight if I walked. I didn't want to call my mom, I didn't want to get her involved in my situation, because yes she will keep asking what happened.

"Hello?" I heard a soft sad voice through the speaker of my phone.

"Josh, can you please pick me up, I really need you right now," I said, my voce sounding a lot like Josh's except from me, there was heavy sobs.

"Oh, Tyler, I'll be there as soon as possible, send me the address," he said hanging the phone up.

I walked in paces on the side of the restaurant, crying, not wanting anyone to see me. I heard the door swing open, and saw Justin run out into the parking lot, checking his car first, to make sure I wasn't inside. I just watched as he searched, I didn't want to be found.

"Tyler?... Tyler?" he yells, the second one a little louder than the first.

"Tyler please! I don't know what I did.

I stepped out and walked up to him, the picture of him sleeping in Jenna's bed, tears building in my eyes. "Well don't you feel guilty of something? You know you did something! And it just sucks Justin, because I actually did love you, never again will I make that mistake." I started down at the ground.

"I just slept over at her house, Ty." he attempted to reassure me.

"With your shirt off? That would have already been wrong, I don't know Justin, I may hate Jenna, but I believe her on this, I mean, not like you haven't cheated before."

"Tyler, but I love you." he said stepping closer.

"If you loved me you wouldn't have screwed my ex girlfriend! Get out of my life," I stood in front of him sobbing.

"Tyler, at least let me drive you home," he asked gesturing over to his car.

"No."

"Tyler, don't be a fucking idiot! I love you cant you see that? Besides, you have no actual proof that we slept together."

"I have all the proof I need," I said not arguing the part where he called me an idiot, I obviously am, I gave him a second chance.

"Just fucking let me drive you home!" he shouted.

I started sobbing more, "I have a ride, just go Justin."

Josh quickly pulled up in a small red car I hadn't seen him driving before. Rolled down the window and told me to get in. I got into the passenger seat and didn't take another look at Justin. I didn't mean anything to him I thought, I wasn't good enough, it's my fault.

"What happened?" Josh asked, I didn't want to say, I didn't want him to say 'I told you so'. Because he did.

"What I should have left him for," I said staring down at my fingers, picking at the edges of my nails.

"Tyler," he paused. "I'm so sorry."

-

He drove me back to my house and I asked him if he would come in, I really just wanted him around right now. I needed him to comfort me, after all of this.

We sat on my bed and didn't talk much, he was staring at his phone and I was staring at my fingertips, tears still welling up in my eyes. I slowly dragged myself to the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I sat on the toilet seat, sobbing, a few seconds later, Josh knocked on the door. I stood up, tears rolling down my cheeks, and unlocked the door. 

I stood in front of Josh, not wanting to make eye contact, I just pulled him close to me and sobbed on his chest. We eventually parted, but our lips collided. I didn't know why I liked it so much, but I did, even though I knew I shouldn't. I cant be with Josh, not right now.

Throughout the kiss I thought of Justin, I felt like I was betraying him, but I knew I wasn't, I was so mad at Justin, I stopped thinking about him and began gripping the bottom of Josh's shirt.

He began pulling mine to, "Is this okay?" he asked, I nodded slightly and pulled his shirt over his head. We brought our make out session over to my bed. We sloppily took each others clothes off, and stayed there for the rest of the night.

-

I woke up the next morning and regretted everything, I didn't really want to do that with Josh, I must wanted to get back at Justin, but now I just feel bad, I didn't even wait a whole day before I did something with someone else. I walked straight to the bathroom linked to my room and took a shower, it wasn't much of an actual shower though, just me crying and thinking about Justin.

I put on a plain black t-shirt and a comfy pair of black skinny jeans, I looked at myself in the mirror, hating the way I look, I looked tired, my eyes bloodshot from sobbing. I slowly walked out of the bathroom to find Josh still asleep on my bed, normally I would make us breakfast or we would go out for breakfast, today, I couldn't.

I waited for the coffee to finish brewing and sat at my dining room table sitting and staring at my thumbs, thinking. Eventually Josh came out of my room, I didn't even look at him, we didn't talk to each other either. I didn't have much to say.

_____________________________________________________________

oKAY I KNOW I'VE BEEN THE WORST AT UPDATING LATELY,,,

and I am so sorry, please don't hate meeee

But this weekend I'm going to try and get chapter 16 started because next week I have testing and I really wanna try and get more updates on this story..

(btw HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRENDON URIE, I LOVE YOU SO MUCHHHHH)

04.12.17