BOYS OF SUBURBIA [boy x boy] [Wattys 2018]

✗ THIRTEEN ✗

It became unanimous.

An unspoken, collateral agreement between them formed to go hang out at the forest anytime they get. When Sebastian's house was filled with demons, his stupid stepfather raining hard on him about responsibility and being 'the man'- whatever the fuck that meant, his mother agreeing with anything his stupid stepfather said- even when his stupid stepfather slapped him a little too hard for comfort whenever he spoke out of turn, when Violet was trying to buy things that kill her lungs from boys who wanted nothing else but her cunt, he called Niko up and asked if he was down for a trip to the forest.

He usually was.

Sebastian suspected Niko had as much shit as he does. Niko had his own monsters, maybe something about his brother's death or personal shit like that but Sebastian doesn't pry. As long as Niko doesn't pry about the swelling bruise on Sebastian's right eye. They weren't really friends (Sebastian would never be able to think of Niko like a friend, not ever), but they hang out way more than they do with their regular friends. After all, Sebastian's own social circle wasn't much to brag about- it mostly consisted of him and Derrick fucking around in his own room, playing Mortal Kombat until their eyes ached with heat, encrusted with flakey dry bits that gathered after a long game. So of course, Sebastian was more than happy to leave Derrick behind to fuck around with Niko in the cafe or McDonalds, or the forest, where privacy was better.

Sebastian was not sure if Niko completely trusted him yet, but he was more than willing to wait. Despite trust issues and them not being really friends yet, Niko and Sebastian were like magnets, where one was, the other would be there.

Sebastian's obsession never faltered. The mixed-race boy was an enigma- Sebastian still doesn't understand why the fuck a cool guy like Niko was spending time with him when Niko had Roger. But Sebastian doesn't press on why; he was just grateful.

Niko showed him a spot in the forest, where the wood was burned into the parched ground that had dry patches of brown grass poking out. Sebastian knew Niko had a deep, creepy little fascination with fire, something that just went beyond cigarettes and joints, something that had to do with swallowing the flames and feeling it burn under his skin. It's deeper and darker than Sebastian can fathom, but they discovered places and secrets they could share.

Sebastian's personal favourite spot was deep in the woods that had really tall, spindly trees with branches reaching out in all directions that were great for climbing, with canopies of laced leaves sheltering them. They would spend hours at a time sitting high above the ground, straddling the tree's limbs and holding cigarettes to each other's mouths. Sometimes they rolled out their joints out there, where they can't get caught, where nobody could see.

"It's so quiet here," noticed Niko, as a bird chirped and flew off into the distance. Niko's legs were slung across the tree's branch. His bag was hanging around his neck, filled with a bunch of illicit substances he had obtained from his boss.

"Yeah," Sebastian was leaning on the tree trunk, cigarette in hand, his eyes drifted up. "It's kind of perfect, you know?"

Sebastian had to stop himself saying what he really wanted to say- there was no doubt he harboured some sort of crush on Niko, not just any crush but a deep, dark crush that scared the bejeesus out of him. Sebastian didn't even know when it started, since their eyes met in third grade or when Niko passed him his first joint, and now he had no choice but to be addicted. The lighter Sebastian swiped from the useless items stocked by his counter at the supermarket he worked with became heavy in Sebastian's pockets as Niko quietly scraped marks into the tree's branch with a pocket knife.

"Hey, Niko."

"Hmm?"

"Look what I bought." Sebastian withdrew the green bic lighter and Niko plainly blinked.

"Yeah?" Niko feigned nonchalance, just out of habit. "So what?"

"Don't you want to make a fire?"

Sebastian could feel Niko tensing, hesitating before he chooses an appropriate answer. Sebastian tracked Niko's line of sight as Niko focused on the joint in between his fingers, feigning interest while smoke halos puffed gently in the air. "No," Niko said, voice odd and high-pitched, "Why would I- why would I want to make a fire?"

Sebastian was looking right at him, close enough that he noticed the mole on his right cheeks and the gentle slope of his nose. It made his heart flip. He leant forward and whispered to him, even when there's nobody within earshot. "It's cool, Niko. I get it. Like, I get it."

In the next few seconds, Sebastian took note of how Niko's shoulders melt when it dawned on him that Sebastian genuinely understood, how his eyes glazed over with something Sebastian was afraid to identify, his pink tongue darting out to swipe over his bottom lip as he put a cigarette to his lips and blew out a long stream of silvery smoke.

"You do?" Niko asked, sounding constricted as if he was being garroted.

"I do," Sebastian spoke quietly, "You're a sick fucker, but so am I."

Niko let out a relieved bark of laughter, "Bet I'm more cracked in the head than you are."

Sebastian smirked, "I bet I could beat you. Pyromania, Niko, really? On top of that, you have a drug addict and mommy and daddy issues."

Niko hissed, "Don't bring my family into this."

For a moment, Sebastian was afraid he took the joke too far. "Um..."

But then a grin cracked across Niko. "Got you."

Sebastian huffed. "That's not fair."

But the cute fucker just exaggerated, puckering up his so kissable lips into a pout, and winked at Sebastian, causing Sebastian to suddenly blush beetroot red and looked away before Sebastian could see.

Fucking hell, Sebastian thought as he felt himself hardened.

____________________________________________________________

HOW IS THIS NOT PRIVATE YET. WOW, VALERIE.

anyway, i feel like these are getting longer as we speak. O.O

vote and comment please. :)