Chapter 12

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When I first started therapy in Florida, my therapist gave me the idea of journaling

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When I first started therapy in Florida, my therapist gave me the idea of journaling. I started a journal and wrote in it for a few months, but eventually, it died off. Most of my entries lacked the topic of the incident—the reason why I was in therapy in the first place—but were about Mr. Russ and my friends in Florida. Though, I suppose they were an escape for me in themselves.

With my friends in Florida, I was an actress, pretending that Harrison never did what he had done. With them, I was an entirely different person. With Mr. Russ, I was an entirely different person also. I became so in love with this fake persona that I even created a name for her, well, not created, I stole a name for her. Daphne.

Yes, Daphne was my best friend before she turned on me, and Daphne, my persona, did the same. Daphne turned on Hailey, picking out everything wrong with her. As long as I was Daphne, I wasn't Hailey. I didn't have to be the broken girl, I could be the okay one. It's confusing, but it helped me in a way that I couldn't quite grasp. It was a temporary fix. Now, here I am, and the temporary fix is over. Daphne stayed in Florida, and only Hailey came back.

I stopped therapy when I left Florida, also. My father offered to pay for it here, in Coldgrove, but I told him a didn't need it anymore. Were eight months enough?

Your father told me he took you to therapy, my mother said when she picked me up from the airport.

He did, I confirmed.

Shame on you. Tricking your own father. Wasting his money on a lie, she muttered.

Walking into the cafeteria, I make my way to the usual table and sit down. Taylor smiles at me, quickly chewing so she can talk. "Hey, Hailey. Is Jana not here today?"

"No. After last night she texted me saying she had a hangover, too bad to ignore I guess," I inform her. "Where's Jordan?"

She looks around the room then points. "Over there."

I look in that direction and see Jordan standing at another table with Daniel. Jordan is talking with a member of the football team, Bradley if I remember correctly. Daniel is trying to listen to Daphne, but he looks very bored. She smiles at him, touches his arm then laughs. He doesn't laugh though. Oddly enough he looks my way, at our table, probably wanting to escape her.

Harrison joins the table, sitting next to Bradley. I bite the inside of my cheek at the site of him, almost balling up my fists. Daniel glances at Harrison with an angry look in his eyes, disgust maybe. Daniel then nudges Jordan and the two walk away, heading towards us.

My eyes shoot to Taylor. "So, how's your day been?"

She looks amused. "Don't act like you weren't just eyeing Daniel. I saw it, and I'm pretty sure that girl saw it too." Taylor gestures to a random girl at the next table.  "Do you actually have a crush on him? Does Hailey have a crush on—"

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