Chapter 29

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I was feeling the alcohol now, my head spinning as we sat together on his bed

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I was feeling the alcohol now, my head spinning as we sat together on his bed. He shushed me quietly then gripped the bottom of my shirt. My face flushed and I quickly held my clothing down, stopping him from pulling it up.

What's the matter? He asked.

I didn't know what to tell him. I was a virgin, I didn't know the routine he did. All in one night I had had my first flirtatious conversation, my first kiss, and then make out. He wanted more, and I ran out of ideas. How was I supposed to tell the most popular, most attractive guy in school that I wasn't ready, even though he wanted to?

I want to go back to the party, I lied, I need to find my friends. They wanted to meet up—

My eyes shot to the clock. It read: 10:57.

They wanted to meet up at eleven, I finished.

He pulled away. Come on, Hailey, let's have some fun. You'll like it, I promise, Harrison said.

He didn't listen when I told him to stop. Harrison didn't listen.

"Hailey?"

I swallow, looking at Daniel. "I need to find Jana—"

Daniel stops me as I try to walk past. "No, you don't. Now tell me what's bothering you."

Staying quiet, I cannot find the right words to say, and this doesn't settle with Daniel.

"What did he do to you?"

I bite the inside of my cheek.

"What did Harrison do, Hailey?"

"You don't get to know both," I say, confusing him for a moment. "You don't get to know both of them."

"Your secrets?" He asks.

I nod.

Daniel pauses as if he's contemplating something, and then he looks at me in a certain way. I know then that he knows. Just from that one look, Daniel is telling me that he's figured it out. Why I don't like to swim, why I don't drink, my reckless driving, my crying, he's figured it out. I hate that he has.

I wonder what tipped him over. Were the unusual responses, the uncomfortable reactions, the hesitation, my sudden panic over such a little thing? I could have controlled, maybe, if he didn't catch me off guard. It is a quick regret, I let down my walls without realizing it. I should have smiled and walked into the party, he would have followed and none of this would have happened.

Or maybe he already knew, maybe he was simply waiting for the right time to let me know.

"Did he—"

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