I See Only Him| 18+✔ [COMPLETED]

Chapter 14| I'm An Idiot

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Kira POV

We got back and Rebecca couldn't stay because she got a message from her work saying she needed to be there tonight for an important pre talk for their important meeting that was supposed to happen tomorrow.

I changed and showered, it was extremely easy for me to get things done this time because of the increase to my senses.  I even was able to shave something Rebecca told me was important for a women, to be honest learning hurt but now I could do it without hurting myself at all, I found something to wear it was cute though we'll the touch of it was.

It was satin and satin with lacy detail according to the tag on the shorts, I just wanted to feel good about myself for one night even if i couldn't see how it actually looked on me.

I laid down and relaxed into the bed letting it enlope me in warmth as I closed my eyes and tried to drift off to sleep.  I woke up to a giant thud from outside my bedroom, I looked over and hit my alarm clock

"3:04 am" it said back to me and I was surprised, it was late and i got up and navigated through my room, but then the door opened and there was Matt in his drunken glory.  I backed up a little as he stumbled into the room looking straight at me, he looked sloppy and gross but kept staring at me and then down my body like somebody who was starving and I was the first course meal.

"Why do you always fuck me up Kira?" He slurred asking me

"What do you mean Matt?" I asked shivers running down my spine

"You flaunting how fucking gorgeous you are to EVERYBODY and then you run to my parents just because I dont want you" Matt snarled at me and I backed up even more to get away worried about how he'd act towards me.

"I'm sorry Matt, I was just sad cause I like you" I admitted lowering my head knowing that there was no point admiting something he already knew.

"Oooh the blind girl likes me what a suprise" he said in a muted tone like for a second he didn't care but there was a crack in his tone that told my heart otherwise. 

"Ur a jerk! I wish i died in that Auction house instead of being bought by you! You don't care about me at all" I yelled at him with tears pooring down my face.

"No! You're not allowed to cry!" He yelled with a panicked look in his eyes, I turned around to face the dark seeing him was starting to be more of a curse than a blessing.  He didn't care about me and he made me feel like death was a better option then seeing his face.  I maybe blind but I didn't want this life, seeing the man who'll only hurt you.

"Go" I said, I rather face the darkness.

"No!" Suddenly I was turned around and a kiss was planted on my lips, I was confused before I let myself melt into his kiss and return it.  I knew in my heart that I shouldn't let him want me with the way he was acting but my body gave up at the touch of his hand on my hip.

"Matt?" I whispered using his name to question what he was doing, he would regret this and I would suffer yet I couldn't help drink the poison the kissed me, I had to have a taste even if it found a way to slowly kill my insides.  At this moment I didn't have an anidote, I wanted to shower in the poison that he gave me even if it was wrong...even though HE wasn't ready...I just couldn't say no.

"Shhh let me want you" Matt whispered and it sounded genuine, you could hear the want in his voice as he pushed me on to the bed and started taking off my clothes.

"Okay" I said, I knew he didn't love me...I knew he just wanted to make the sad girl inside me happy, I knew he just wanted me to stay where he could see me and never run away.  I knew he wanted control, to keep his treasure close even if he wasn't ready to want it.

So I let him want me, I let him touch places I was afraid to let another man touch.  I let him show me colors behind my eyes as I screamed his name into the covers and a tinted red was permanently stained to my cheeks.  I let him hold my body in his hand for tonight even though he wasn't sure what he wanted.

I didn't regret it when he released his seed inside me without a second thought, saying screw the condom not even asking for confirmation that I was protected myself...I wasn't.   But at this moment I didn't care for the future, but I knew I will regret my choices one day.

Maybe not know but later.  I felt him fall asleep next to me with his arm around me protecting me...or protecting himself for the reality of tomorrow when he wakes up to find himself next to the women he wasn't sure he wanted.   I felt my eyes close as I hid my face into the pillow and accepted his warmth just one more time before he regretted everything we did together.

I was prepared for the morning that awaited me and the pain it would cause, I was ready to feel the rath of a man who's ego was to high to accept a blind girl who cared so deeply for him.  She was ready to be pushed away until he realized what he lost, I was ready to give up until he was ready.

I was ready to be lost in the darkness that I was already blessed with behind these blind eyes.