Mute ~Josh Dun x reader~

~Anathema~

Y/n POV

I didn't get out of bed today, I didn't sleep at all, I didn't do anything, I had the warm covers around my body while looking up to my ceiling, I let out a heavy sigh, Why do I deserve this, Why can't i sleep, Why won't you torture someone else sleep and head, Haven't life taken enough from me, It took Josh, It took Tyler, It took everyone. I would say "I am fine" When I'm not. I have to hide under this mask that's in my skin. I decided to lift my self up. I lift my body to feel coldness hit my arms, But At this point, It didn't matter, Everything In my life is cold, I go to the bathroom and see my eye, Blood shot red, My hair is messy, My E/c is no longer filled with happiness, It filled with sadness. I turn around and turned on the faucet, to take a long Cold/hot shower. I step inside I look so and see my scars on my arm, Some are fresh, some are old, Josh never saw these scars, cause I never showed my arms. I got out of the shower, and wrapped a towel around me, I went to my room and got dress (Whatever you want to wear,) And decided to go to the park, I don't see Josh, But I do see Tyler, He is by himself, He looks up and see's me, His coffee brown eye's meet with my E/c, "Hey y/n" I smile and I finally decided to do something, "Hey Tyler" I wrote down, "So anything up" I stopped and think, Everything up, Josh finding someone and not hanging out with me anymore, Tyler rarely talking to me, me not getting enough sleep, why can't i just live in a happy life. "well i gotta go Jenna wants to meet up" Tyler stands up and hugs me. Jenna so that's his girlfriends name, Its a pretty name (If your name is Jenna den sorreh) I get up and go home, I walk into my room and play a CD Tyler gave me a few months ago, Its a self tittle album, He said listen to track 5. I feel like crying, But i also don't. I'm hungry, But what's the point of eating. What's the point of everything, But I have to take care of myself, I go to the kitchen and open the fridge, There's was nothing much, I decided to get Milk and oreos, I went to the t.v and turned it on, "There' s going to be a 70 percent of rain today, starting at 5 pm" Rain. It calms me. But there's always a storm after. I go outside to see a drizzle of rain slowly coming down from the gray sky, I Hear from the background of from the t.v "Scattered thunderstorms possible. Highs in the low 80s and lows in the mid 60s"I look back and see the t.v still shining "On Friday night A few clouds. A stray shower or thunderstorm is possible. Low 64F. Winds NNE at 5 to 10 mph", It shows the forecast for the rest of the week, It show's it's going to be raining for the rest of the week, I'm not sure If I should go to the park anymore, It used to be my safe spot, But then everyone kept bring themselves there, So it's no longer my safe spot, Now my only safe spot is my room, well..It's always been, I later on bring out my notebook and write what's ever on my mind, The page is blank, I have nothing on my mind. I can't think of anything, My mind is blank like the paper, All I think about is Josh. Just Josh, but I don't know what I think of him anymore, I don't know if I think of him as a friend, Or more then a friend, but of course, I doubt Josh likes me, Why would he. I look to the window and see that the drizzle turned into heavy rain drops, hearing them through the window sounding like rocks hitting it. I later then restart the self titled album, I decided to listen to track 10, It's calming me down with the rain, I wonder what Tyler was thinking while writing this album, He also gave me an other album, It's called Regional at best. I saw him holding an other album he decided not to give me, I saw it was called "No Phun Intended" I want to hear it, But I'm not forcing Tyler, I decided to listen to it, Tyler said he is still working on it, He said he want to add one more song, But he said he has no ideas. I want to hear it if he has an Idea. I decided to write something just to give him an idea I open my book and I look at the page and read in my head  "I know..Where you stand, Silent in the trees..and that's where I am..Silent..In the trees..Why won't You speak? where I happened to be" Then I look to the other side of the page "You will never know, What's behind my soul, So won't you say goodnight, so I could say goodbye..Won't you torture someone Else's sleep, Won't you torture someone Else's head, haven't you taken enough from me, Won't you torture someone else-" I want to know what else he wrote I decided to look through the album and hear each song. Anathema. The song is Anathema. It's pretty calming. I look around and see it's still raining. I decide to get up and decided to get the regional at best album and self titled to see IS there anything that connects together. So far i haven't found any, Maybe if there some in no phun intended album, But I'd rather not be in Tyler's business. I opened my window to see how the rain feels like, It sounds like the rain is falling so hard, But it's actually kinda relaxing, It then turned 10pm i decided to go to bed, I got in my covers and layed my head on the pillow cuddling some blankets and pillows, and ended up going off to sleep

I woke up to hear a huge thunder making it feel like the ground is shaking, I decided to sleep to Tyler album. And ended up sleeping again, but this time I felt something making me not to sleep. I feel like I'm being tortured , All I want to say is goodnight, and goodbye.

(THANK YOU GUYS FOR 100 VIEWS I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH IT IS IMPORTANT TO ME THANK YOU <3)