I want to tell someone, but I can't. Who can I trust? Cam? No. They wouldn't understand.
I tried talking to Edward. Some random guy I don't actually want to get close to. I just wanted to get it out.
He didn't understand. He got upset. I'm sorry.
I should have known better. I shouldn't have said anything. I'm so stupid.
I should not be allowed to participate in social interaction.
What's wrong with me?
Why is this happening? Why can't I just stop? Why can't I get rid of it? Why am I crying?I hate it. I hate myself.
I need to escape. I don't want to be myself anymore.
Fuck this.
I can't do it. It hurts so much. I want it gone. I can't. It's so fucking cold. It burns. It's not working.
I want it to stop.
It's so hypnotizingly beautiful; I hate it. Its painful; how can I stop?
It's not the problem, I'm the fucking problem.
Why am I here? Why is this happening? Why do i care? Why does it hurt? Why can't I control it? Why can't I make it disappear? Why can't I do it? Why do i want to?
I hate it.
YOU ARE READING
Explaination
אקראיI was told I should write a book. So why not? Its gonna suck, and I don't apologize. Its not a story, or anything with a real plot, just some thoughts of mine. I don't know how deep this shit's gonna go, I'm just rolling with it. I do encourage comm...
