bts angst imagines/scenarios (CLOSED)

hoseok x reader: Reacts to old scars

(Mild smut warning!!!!)

You and hoseok had been dating for almost 4 months now, but you've never gone past kissing. Hoseok never complained, though you knew he wanted you. You could see the lust in his eyes when you kissed, and you wanted him to. You wanted him so badly that it almost hurt, but you couldn't.

Hoseok didn't know about your past mental struggles. He didn't know about... Them. You were to scared to show him because of what his reaction would be. You thought of so many scenarios, but it even ended badly in your imagination. But you thought that today would be the day.

Hoseok was staying at your house over the weekend. He had a 10 day break from his work as an idol, and it was so sweet of him to spend some time with you. You didn't want to lie anymore.

You stood in your underwear in the bathroom. Looking in the mirror at the scars that littered your body. There were scars on your thighs, arms, stomach, and even on your chest. You self harmed for about 4 years, and only stoped 1 year ago. You were proud to say that you hadn't slipped back into your old habit yet.

You quickly threw your clothes back on and walked out to the living room where hoseok was watching tv. You gulped and walked twords him, knowing what you were going to do. You tried to remain strong, but you didn't know how long that would be able to last.

" hoseok?" you said softly. He turned his head to look at you, his expression soft, and almost worried at your tobe of voice. " can i... Talk to you about something?" you looked down as you asked this, mentally hitting yourself for sounding so awkward.

" of course jagi. You can tell me anything" hoseok said softly. He scouted over and patted the couch for you to come sit. You complied and sat stiff with your hands resting in fist on your legs. Hoseok didn't know what to expect. He rarely saw you upset, and he was scared about what you might tell him. He even thought you might be breaking up with him!

You took a deep breath in, and slowly released it through your mouth. You looked up at hoseok's worried expression. You struggled to find the right words to tell him.

"Well um... I wanted to tell you that... Uhh" you stuttered. You were so scared, you were even slightly shaking. You felt a warm hand on your leg.

" its ok jagi. You can trust me" he said. He looked at you with the most caring eyes in the world. Then you thought to yourself. It now or never.

" hoseok..." you said softly. " im done hiding". Hoseok had a slightly confused expression as you stood up. You couldn't find the words to tell.him, so you thought showing him would be the best option.

Hoseok heart began to race with worry as he saw you pull up your sleeve. It cant be... Can it?   He thought to himself. But his thoughts were correct. His eyes ran across your arms covered in scars. He covered his mouth in shock. You winced as you felt him stand up and grab your wrist. He looked down, tears were forming in both of your eyes as he dragged his finger down your wrist.

" did... Did you do this?" he said quietly, looking up at you. You slowly nodded. Hoseok sat back down of the couch, and slouched over, leaning his face on his hands. Tears started streaming down. He quickly swiped them off and looked back at you. " are there.. Any more"

You nodded weekly with a soft " mm hmm". Tears started running down your cheeks as well.

" take of your pants" he said sternly. You gently tugged down your sweatpants, and sat on the couch to tug them off your ankles. Hoseok ghosted his hand over the white lines on your thighs. He looked back at you. " your.. Shirt?" he asked softly. You nodded and tugged of the loose sweater. All of your scars on display.

Hoseok pulled you both to a standing position. He ran his finger along the. Scars on your sides, and held you close.

" are they... New?" he asked slowly. You shook your head.

" no. I haven't... Don't that since last year..."

" good" he said. He pulled you into a tight hug, you cried into his shoulder and gripped the back of his shirt.

" are... Are you... Mad?" you asked between sniffles. You felt a hot tear drip onto your shoulder.

" of course not!" hoseok said. He held you by the shoulders, and looked at you in the eyes. " i... I love you. I. Love you more than you could ever imagine. Thinking that you were in so much pain that you wanted to... Hurt yourself. It... Its breaking me. I cant think of any reason why you would want to do that."

He pulled you back into the hug and whispered into your ear.

" if you ever feel like doing this again. Just come to me. I will always be here for you. I promise". Hoseok lifted your chin and slowly kissed you with all of his love. You wrapped your hands around his neck, and he rested his hands on your waist. The streams of your tears went dry as you kissed.

He pushed you onto the couch. The kiss became more intense. Hoseok slowly lifted up from you.

" is... Is this.. Ok?" he asked softly. " i mean... I just found out... Do you really want to.. Uhh"

" hoseok." you said. " its ok but... Its... My first so..."

" ok" he said sweetly. "we should probably go to the bedroom" he smiled as he spoke. He lifted you up bridal style, making you blush. What happened that night was better than you ever imagined it to be.