I Need Memory (VIXX Ravi Fanfic)

Memory 2 | Depend On Me

RAVI'S POV:

My gaze remained lingering on the beautiful view of the calm winter ocean while we waited for the roads to clear. All of our promotional activities for the latest comeback were officially over and the only thing left for us to do was leave for a solid vacation to get our minds off work as soon as we reach the dorm.

However, our supposedly relaxing holidays were a little delayed by the heavy traffic in the urban city of Seoul. Since it was a Friday night, most of the city dwellers were hyped up to return home for the weekends, I guessed.

At the end of a tiresome week, it must be comforting to have someone who'd be waiting for them. Whom they can completely depend on without any worries about the heavy workloads or the hardships of life.

I do have a home. I have a loving family, from whom I gain unlimited comfort and confidence to get through hard times. The streets I remembered running around, making friends, growing up, and falling in love... Those were all my rooms of immense comfort and I often find myself depending on my treasured memories from those places.

Well... everything back at home, was still the same as before. The playground, the coffee shop, the school and even the canola field which I worried would be destroyed for industrial purposes. Everything was still there. Every single memory was still there.

Except her.

She, the one I used to push swings for at the playground.
She, the one I used to spend hours with after school at the coffee shop.
She, the one I used to chase around in the canola field.

The person with whom I shared all my cherished memories. I wouldn't say that she's a part of my comfort zone, because she, herself was my own secret comfort zone in a way I could never describe with words. In her presence, I'd always forget all of my distress and downright depended on that comfort of having her beside me.

However, I only came to realize that truth, after I lost her for good that night. Since then, every time I returned home, my heart would desperately find an anonymous sense of belonging and it took me a really long time before finally discovering the source of it. What I was looking for was not the type of comfy that I'd normally feel around my family members but it was a totally different one.

The one that her smile alone brought whenever she catches me running towards her after a long day at school. The type of comfort which allowed me to be truly vulnerable and depend on that one person who could offer it. The type of comfort that only, my Mira could offer. However, I hadn't felt that in five long years and I can't help but crave more for it as years passed by.

"Lost in the Möbius strip of your own head, I see..." I snapped out of my monologue immediately at the sound of my best friend's voice.

Hongbin was looking at me with his I-know-what-you're-thinking expression as I attempted to shift in my position to face him completely. That's when I noticed the giant figure that was cuddled close to me the whole time.

"Ah... Jyani hyung..."

Our cute main vocalist was curled up beside me and I couldn't help but laugh at his adorable sleeping figure. Despite being older than me, he was still a child at heart and that innocent personality was often exhibited by him unknowingly. It always made me want to protect him. He whined cutely and snuggled even closer when I tried to push him away, earning laughter from both Hongbin and me.

"Aigoo... this hyung! I don't know why he loves doing that to me." I feigned annoyance while placing his head precisely on my shoulder so that he wouldn't fall.