Someone is going to Die

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Keith tossed violently around; it had been another sleepless night for him. He missed his wife dearly but was trying to use this time to really understand himself.

There weren't any magic wands that made the pain disappear; it still hurt...a lot.

Keith gulped down the prickling splinter of new tears forming. He hated that Kaya had cheated on him. He just kept picturing another man touching and kissing his wife the way he always wanted to. The image of that blue eyed bastard danced gleefully in his head taunting him.

He groaned punching his pillow. Lately, he wasn't feeling like himself, but it was worse than just feeling blue. He found it difficult to get up and get dressed. The things Keith use to enjoy he no longer cared for. Life was fading and bleak like his positive attitude.

Physically it felt like he on the edge, burning and tossing with a tension that strangled and suffocated him. His whole body was wired with jittery pains and he found it hard to breathe.

Keith gasped looking at his hands tremble. He reached for a bottle of pain pills and shoved three tiny white capsules in his mouth. He closed his eyes letting the chalky powder dissolve; wishing he could make all the madness stop.

Keith picked up his cell phone dialing the only number he kept for emotional emergencies.

"Dr...Ddddreeew" he stammered looking helplessly at his speckled ceiling, "I need help" he sobbed rubbing his eyes.

Dr. Drew spoke calmly to him, the last thing she wanted to do was startle her patient, "okay, just breathe and listen to my voice. Tell me what you are experiencing" she encouraged.

Keith took a deep hoarse breath as he sat up in his bed crushing the phone in his tight grip, "like the pain will never stop" he sobbed, "It hurts so much. I feel like I'm losing my mind!" he said pouring out in frustrations.

Dr. Drew nodded understandingly,"that's called grief. If you focus on my voice I can help you control it but only time can heal it" she instructed.

Keith nodded wiping his red puffy eyes, "How could I love her when it's this painful?" he asked.

"You have to allow time for healing..then only you can answer that question" Dr. Drew advised.

Keith groaned he didn't want to hear that there wasn't a easy fix for his problems, "I have to get ready for tomorrow. I'm going to propose to her" he explained.

"In my professional opinion, I think it's too soon for you to be making these type of decisions and commitments," Dr. Drew told Keith.

Keith snarled angrily he had misread the therapist advice, "so you don't want to see us together?!" Maybe when you're married Angelia you can speak on this" he said rudely.

Dr. Drew's remained calm but there was a little sharpness in her voice , "My name is Dr. Drew please never address me by my first name, thank you. I know your anger is misplaced so I'll let you have a pass this time..." she said softening her voice.

Keith shook his head, "I apologize I forget that this is all business for you and how people feel doesn't matter unless I sign a check" he said coldly, hanging up the phone.

He knew that what he had said to the doctor was uncalled for but he couldn't see past the stabbing pain and rage he was harvesting.

Keith grunted walking drunkenly around in the dark, stumbling over various items on his floor. He rummaged through his cabinet until he found some very strong sleeping pills. Keith poured them all in his mouth without looking.

A vile bitter taste immediately spread in his mouth, "yuck!" he said spitting them out everywhere.

He wiped his mouth and went back to bed.

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