Heart Beat [Fall For You Again]

[31] Love Hate

Copper POV

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"Tell me it is a lie!"

That words always playing in my mind. His voice and the beg he made, I could remember it clearly. I heard it in my mind.

I wish I could say it was a lie like he wanted but I couldn't. It is real. It happened.

I hated it. I hated universe who played with us and the God who made us suffering.

Sleepless. It was something that I always get everyday since the truth was revealed. Everything became a mess. My life became a mess.

My relationship with him, I couldn't define it. Are we still dating or break up? I didn't know. We just didn't talk anymore. Not I cut the relationship with him. It is just he always tried to avoid and ignored me whenever I tried to talk to him.

Did I gave up?

Hell no. I am Copper and I always up for challenge. And now, my challenge is to win him back and to fix everything. I wanted him back to be mine because I can't see my future without him.

He is my future and my future is him. Oh, the most cutest mushroom in the world for me.

Do you know what is the hardest thing apart being ignored by him? Watching him from afar and not able to be close even though you wanted it.

Everyday, everytime, I always watching him from afar. Break time I always come to his faculty only to see if he already eat or not. At the end of school, I always follow him from behind to make sure he is safe.

It was hard but at least that the only thing I could do this time. Only watching him made me felt at ease. It decreased my pain little by little.

As usual, I followed him from behind. I kept the distance between us, so he couldn't recognise I was following him.

He walked like a zombie. No soul. Just a body without soul. He walked and sometime he bumped strangers. He kept appologizing when it happened.

This time is different. He bumped someone and it made him fell. His knee was bleeding because of it. He cringed. The stranger who he bumped, scolded him. He cried and screamed. That stranger look confused and left him.

I ran after my Oh. He still sat on the ground and cried. He cried like a child who lost his favorite toy.

I came and helped him to clean his clothes. He kept crying and crying. I wanted to hold him so I could help him to get up but he pushed me.

"I hate you!" he cried, "But why I miss you?"

"Oh.... Let me help you na...." He pushed me away when I tried to reach his arms. I fell and my bottom kissed the ground first. It hurts but not more pain than seeing him being broken like that.

"I hate you!" He yelled at me. He screamed and kept crying and crying. I came close and hugged him. He wanted to push me away again but I held him tight. I kept hugging him.

"I am sorry...."

"I hate you... I hate you... I hate you... I hate you..." He kept repeating that words over and over again for nnth times until he felt so tired. His voice shrank and then he fell silent. He was sleeping because of tiredness.

I lift him up and carried him in bridal style. I put him in my care, at the back seat. I laid down him there and then drove him to his dorm.

Sun helped me to bring his stuff when he saw me carried Oh with me.

"What happen with him?" he asked me, "Did you do something bad to him again?"

"I didn't" I told him, "I swear. Please help me to open the door"

He did that. As the door opened, I put him on the bed, cleaned his wound and then covered his body with duvet. I let him rest. Sun has gone to buy some foods for Oh.

"I hate you Copper!" he murmured in his sleep, "But why my heart is hurting because I hate you?"

I looked at him. He was sleeping and his eyes still closed. I took his hand and stroked his hair.

"I am sorry to hurt you again, Oh. I am sorry"

I leaned my face close to him. I kissed his forehead and landed my lips on his lips. I kissed him. My this is the last kiss of us. The kiss goodbye. Maybe.

"Maybe from the beginning, I shouldn't come to your life Oh. I am sorry" I said to myself, "And goodbye, my cute mushroom"

I got up and ready to leave but he held my hand tightly. His grip was strong, like he didn't want to let me go.

"Don't go!" he murmured again, "Please don't go. Don't leave alone again, Sun. My Copper!"

*****

Sun called and told me if Oh headed to somewhere. I drove to find him. I drove my car around and finally I found him there, walking to the bus stop.

I parked my car and went to him, keeping my distance. I didn't want him to see me there.

He went in to bus and I followed him from another door and sat far behind him. I covered myself with news paper, so he wouldn't see me.

Sometime I saw him looked out from the window. His gaze look so sad. His face look in pain. It made me wanted to come to him and hugged him. I didn't like to see him like that.

The bus stop and he went out. I followed him who walked straight to somewhere. He went to a monastery and headed to a pagoda. He stood up in front of one of small glass box. There was two small jars.

"Hello, mom dad this is your son, Oh. Long time no see" he greeted, "I am so sorry to take so long to visit you" he cried.

I waited him until he finished his reunion with his late parent. I still could hear hos cry. He sobbed. I couldn't hold it back. I ran to him and hugged him.

He tried to push me away but I kept hugging him. He hit my chest many times and cried. I let him did that to me. He was crying like more than ten minutes.

He walked like a drunken guy. To the left and right like he wanted to fall. I just kept following him from behind. He stopped and turned around. He looked at me.

"Bring me to your father!" he told me, "I want to meet him!"

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I am sorry I got stuck

I will try my best for the next chapter

See you
Xoxo