Lost Cause

I'm never going to give up or leave you

******************Liam's POV****************

I couldn't sleep I was to worried about Megan, the way she flinched everytime I touched her arms, I decided to tell Louis in the morning. My head was spinning and my thoughts were racing at 100 miles per hour.

I snapped out of my trance to hear the sounds of sobs coming from the bathroom, I got out of bed quickly but quitley and made my way to the door of the bathroom. The light wasn't on but I could see someone sat with against the bath.

I stepped in to see who it was but what I saw broke my heart there she was Megan, sat on the bathroom floor cutting herlsef, she dropped the blade to the floor and started crying she looked shocked at the fact she was crying, I took one more step forward and she saw me she could barley speak through choking on tears 

"H-how have you been stood there?" she looked at me through glistening tear drenched eyes

"About 5 or so minutes" my eyes were watering tears slowly rolling down my cheek I wiped them away quickly. I knelt infront of her at eye level  and picked up her arm to see what damage she had done, a few deep a few shallow and some that looked like they were made earlier

"Why Megan?" she didn't answer me "Megan why!?" my voice raised slightly 

"Because I'm broken,OKAY!" she practicly screamed the last part. She was definitly broken, I got up and went to put the light on he voice was quite barley audible but the words spoken hit me like a bullet 

"Just leave everyone else has I'm not worth it just let me die on the batroom floor it's all that's left for me now" Now the light was one I could see her properly, blonde hair hanging loosely down her face half tied up half down, blood smeared across her clothes and a pool of scarlet blood by her arm, tears stained her face 

"Megan Tomlinson I would never leave you and no one else has not your mum your dad or brothers, and don't you dare say that all that is left for you is to die because you have so much more for you in this world, so don't you dare" the sadness overtook me along with the anger as I helped her of the floor and over to the sink 

I ran the water and put her arm under it, the blood turning the water a wash of red, I found a bandage in the cabinet over the sink. I dressed her wound but then it struck me why it so much when I grabbed both her arms 

"Megan show me your other arm" she pulled it around her back and hesitated a second before giving me it, I rolled up the sleeve of her hoodie to see the same cuts cover in her some deep some shallow

"Have you cut anywhere else" please just let it be on her arms 

"My t-thighs a-a-nd stomac-h" she could just get the words out 

"Megan show me" she responded by rolling her vest up and bottoms down slightly. Across her stomach was a few jagged long cuts but the word FAT was carved over and over again, it wasn't just the cuts that caught my eyes and shocked me it was the extreme ovbiousness of her ribs and her hips bone. 

I glanced at her thighs lines and lines of cuts and scars covered her skin, I couldn't say anything we both looked at each other before she pulled up her bottoms and her top down, how was I going to tell Louis this it's not something I can slip in over coffee or be like 'Oh yeah Lou I caught Megan self harming last night and I also thing she might be anorexic." no but what if me telling him was going to make things worse for Megan, but she's not in the right state of mind now to talk.

"We need to talk Megan" 

"No" her bright green eyes shimmered with tears 

"Yes, but not now, tomorrow morning we can go for a drive some place okay?"

"Okay, can I have a hug please Liam" I didn't say yes I just put my arms around her and pulled her onto my chest, her face was buired in my neck my chin ontop of her head, her body relaxed in my arms before she pulled away, she looked tired 

"Come on lets get you back to bed" we walked down the hall to her room my arm around her shoulder reassuring her that it was al going to be okay. She got into bed and I kissed her on the forehead but she said something that surrprised me 

"Liam stay with me until I'm asleep" I sat on the chair by her bed for about 20 minutes before I was finally sure she was sound asleep, I got up and slowly walked to the door so I didn't wake her or Rose.

*********NEXT MORNING***********

I was up first that moring so I went to sit in the living room till everyone else started to wake up.

I threw on some jeans a white t-shirt and a hoodie. I got downsatirs and saw that someone was already up I could tell who it was by her long blonde hair, Megan. 

I went to sit oppisite her 

"Morning sweetie" my words were soft and quite 

"Morning, so do you want to go for this drive now then since no one will be up for another couple hours" she couldn't look at me for more than a spilt second it was like she was ashamed and embarssed of what happened last night

"Yeah okay let's go"

************30 MINUTES LATER**************

I drove to some fields that had picnic benches and a nice view but that's not what we have come for. We walked for a little bit before we sat down, when we did I decided to bite the bullet and just come out and ask her 

"Why do you do it Megan?" her face wasn't putting a front on anymore no fake smiling. Her eyes were full of sadness.

"So I can feel anything but pure hatred and anger"

"Is that why you smoke aswell" she was shaking I think she needed a cigarette

"Yeah and it is also why I drink and basicly destory my whole fucking life because I don't have a life Liam, I am just a body there is nothing in me and I can't cope living anymore" she was talking about suicide.

I grabbed her hands and pulled her face so she was looking me in the eye

"Listen to me okay, don't you dare kill yourself because I know that you want to. You can get through this Megan because you are strong and beautiful and are worth so much more than a bottle of vodka or a cigarette or a blade"

"Liam beuatiful strong girls aren't covered in scars and don't crave the sight of theie own blood just so they know how to feel alive"

"These scars prove you are strong they prove it because they are your battle wounds and they show you have been through more than the average person but have fought and won, Megan you are a little fighter so keep fighting and we can get through this" I let go of her hands and hugged her

"I suppose you are going to tell mum and dad, and they will send me ofd to some looney hospital so they don't have to deal with me and can focus finally on Jake and Lloyd"

"No I'm not going to tell them but you have to promise me this, I will take you to see a counciler but if things don't get better after 1 month then I will have no choice and will tell them" she looked at me confusion painted clearly on her face as if she thought why I cared so much

"You would do that for me" her voice started cracking and she teared up

"Yes Megan because I will never give up on you or leave you"