Lost Cause

Uninvited guests

The thought of having fresh scars on my wedding day was what stopped me relapsing many times during the time we planned the wedding. But the closer the day got the more the stress became to much and the stronger the urges became and that brings us to now.

I stood clutching the blade in my hand in Faiths bathroom. Mum, Georgia, Faith and I were all staying over at Faiths and getting ready for the wedding here tomorrow. Tom, Matt and dad were over at mine.

I closed my eyes trying to calm myself down. It's my wedding day tomorrow I can't have fresh cuts not my arms not on my thighs. I was snapped from my thoughts by a knocking on the door.

"Megs are you okay?" Georgia's voice chimed through the wood. I dropped the blade into the bin and unlocked the door, Georgia stood there her eyebrows raised at me.

"Arms." Her words were stern but kindness rediated through them. I swear she actally has telepathicness, is that a word?

I pulled my arms out for her to see and she smiled when there was nothing fresh. We headed down to the living room were mum and Faith sat chatting. They turned their attention to us.

"You ready?" Mum asked, me and Georgia nodded and grabbed our coats and headed to the car. We were going out for dinner, nothing special yeah I know but it was all I wanted.

--

We got back to Faiths at 11. Dinner was good I still struggled abit but I manged, I couldn't get this constant sick feeling out of my stomach a feeling that something was going to go wrong. 

"Anyone for a cuppa? " I asked they all nodded and I wandered into the kitchen and made four teas.

Everyone noticed how 'off' I was and knew it wasn't just nerves, so to take my mind of it Faith decided we should watch Micheal Mcyntrye.

I looked down to the now stone cold cup of tea in my lap and decided to call it a night. 

I muttered goodnight to everyone and went upstairs to the spare room nearly flawing myself in the process by tripping over Georgia's air bed.

I changed and got into bed, completely avoid the bathroom if at all possible because I knew the temptation to fish the blades from the bin would be to much. 

I got into bed and checked my phone, I had one message expecting it to be from Matt I opened it happily, but it wasn't.

unknown~: See you at the wedding tommorow,  Megan - Grace.

My heart rate sky rocketed the only people outside of family and close close friends that knew my full name was Matt,  Mads and Aria. 

Considering I have Matt's number saved on my phone and Mads is dead, and as far as I know dead people can't text then it has to be from Aria, but it can't be because I changed my number after she stopped texting me. 

So who the fuck was it from.

I ran my shaky hands through my hair before there was a knock at the door. 

"Yeah. " The door opened and light from the landing flooded into my vision.

"Are you okay, you've been funny all evening." Mum walked in and sat next to me on the bed.

"I'm just scared, scared that it's not going to work out between us I mean, you hear about it people that get married young never last and they get divorced and if we get divorced its not exactly going to stay private mum is it given who my parents are. " I blurted out at thirty miles an hour but mum just about caught it all.

She got up and changed into some pajamas and came lay next to me on the bed,  she pulled me into her arms like when I was a small child.

"You and Matt are stronger than you think, look at where you both met, that's enough proof and trust me I know how you feel living your life in the public eye you've been lucky growing up though that me and your dad manged to keep the press away as much as possible. "