Break my Heart

| 15 |

"Uh, sure," I set my bags down next to the couch. My Mother patted the seat beside her as a way of telling me to sit down. I sat down beside her and looked between the two. They looked like they were having a silent argument.

"Y/n I want to say sorry in advance," Jack's Mom started.

"It'll be okay whatever it is," I reassured her, grabbing her hand. She avoided my gaze with a grimace. My nerves started to pick at my stomach.

"Okay," my Mother scrolled through her phone before clicking on something. She took a deep breath before showing me her phone. Full screen on her phone was a picture of two people kissing. I took in their features slowly, a deep sadness filling my body. The boy was instantly recognisable with his brown hair that fit perfectly with his freckled face. The girl with dark hair and the little over tan skin only made my sadness worse. Jack was kissing Ellie.

"W-when was this?" I stared at the picture with an overwhelming sadness mixed with anger.

"Today. We saw them at the park while taking a walk," my Mother's voice was quiet.

I dropped Jack's Mother's hand. I abruptly stood from the couch, head whirling with thoughts. I felt tears prick my eyes. I quickly walked to my bags and gripped them all into my hands. I started up the stairs at a quick pace. The sadness and anger grew with each step. My pace was subconsciously growing until I was running up the stairs. I tripped over a step and dropped all of my bags. I quickly swiped them up and ran the rest of the way.

I threw my door open and slammed it shut. I pushed my bags to the side and felt all of my sadness bubbling up. I locked my door and slid down it. My tears ran down my face uncontrollably. I slid down the door with my head in my hands. I sobbed into my knees, gripping my hair tightly. Why would he do this to me?

Why did he kiss me if he would just turn around and do this?

What did I do wrong?

Why was I so inferior to her?

What happened to what he said before?

Why didn't he tell me before he did it?

Was she that much better than me?

Was I that ugly and boring?

Why was I stupid enough to believe he would like me?

My fingernails dug into my scalp causing me slight pain. My sobs only got worse and were more heavy. My breathing started to quicken and I tried to stop my tears so I could breath. The tears wouldn't stop falling. I gasped for air as my sobs continued. I quickly stood up so I could try to calm down. I stood in front of the mirror but that only made it worse. I didn't want to see what was so inferior to Ellie. I was disgusted by my own mess of a reflection.

My anger for Ellie was the highest it has ever been. I felt anger towards Jack too but I couldn't keep it as steady as the one for Ellie. I wanted to punch something. Preferably Ellie but I only had a mirror as the closest thing to a person. I stood on the other side of the room away from my mirror so I couldn't punch it.

"Are you okay?" my Mom's voice was full of concern.

"Please just g-go away," I choked over my words. I heard her footsteps going down the stairs. I let out a shaky breath.

I tried again to steady my breathing. I still couldn't stop crying. I had never cried so much in my life. I grabbed a tissue and held it up to my eye. It helped only a small bit. I threw the tissue to the side and continued to focus on my breathing.

I started to hear people arguing downstairs. A male voice was involved. A sickening feeling came over me as I realized the voice belonged to Jack. I heard his Mother too.