Break my Heart

| 17 |

"Y/n..." Jack's eyes softened as he stared at me. He reached a hand towards me but I backed away. Tears filled my eyes as I stared up at the freckled face of the one I love. A sense of anxiety filled my body. I didn't want to know what he had to say. His hand touched my shoulder gently and he tried to make me face him.

"Please don't touch me," my voice cracked. He took his hand away from my shoulder. I hugged myself as I felt tears start to escape. I wanted him to love me but I was scared. If he actually did love me, would he treat me like he treated Ellie? Being loved by him meant trouble at it's finest. He only wanted to hurt girls. He was a heartbreaker, it's what he does.

"Y/n please look at me," Jack started. I felt his eyes on me from behind. Those sweet brown puppy eyes. My heart urged me to look into those beautiful brown eyes. I felt another tear fall down my cheek as I didn't move.

"P-please leave. Leave my room and don't come back until you figure your feelings out. They may not be for me but they're for someone and if she doesn't want me near you I can't take you away from her. I don't know if she loves you back but she doesn't want me near you," I placed my forehead on my wall.

"Y/n please," the desperation in his voice was so strong I wanted to give him a chance to talk. It hurt to hear his pleading voice. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to face him. I instantly saw his desperate eyes that hurt me so much.

"Jack no please just leave," the hurt in his eyes killed me. My lip quivered as tears started pouring out of my eyes. I started to slide down the wall with my eyes closed. "Leave, leave, leave, leave."

"Y/n I lo-"

"LEAVE!" I sobbed out. I saw his wide surprised eyes one last time before he let go of my hands and left.

-·☾·-

I sat in my bed holding my phone. Why was sending something like this so hard? I stared at the black words displayed in front of my eyes.

I'm so sorry Jack

I didn't send it. I shouldn't have told him I loved him. I shouldn't have told him to leave. But I didn't want him to know that. If there's the slightest chance he loved me I was going to take it. Unless he loved Ellie more.

I laid down on my side looking at my phone. I groaned at my pathetic apology and threw my phone to the side of my bed. I heaved a sigh as I felt the sadness creep up on me again. There was basically a permanent frown on my face.

I hopped up from my bed and threw on Jack's hoodie. I opened my door and called out to my Mom. "I'm walking. I'll be back."

I closed the door before she could answer. I stuffed my hands in my pockets and sighed as I started walking. It was cold outside and looked like it might snow. I hoped for snow to start falling then and there. Snow is so pretty and might calm me if I'm lucky. There would also be no school which means no Ellie.

I stopped to look at the swing set. I had been swinging when Ellie broke up with Jack. That moment was only a month ago. Of course it didn't seem like that long. So much stuff had been happening. Especially the falling in love with my best friend part. I gave a small pathetic laugh at my thoughts.

Someone was already swinging but I didn't give them a second look as I sat down. I pushed off the ground and stared at the sky. I closed my eyes and embraced the cold air that pushed against my face.

"Y/n...?" I heard a small broken voice call out. I glanced at where the voice came from. Ellie was in the swing beside me. She sniffled and looked like she had been crying.