Behind The Scenes: Book One || Yoonkook

III: Trip To America

Weeks passed without Lee contacting him and their trip to America was the very next day. Maybe this is what Lee wanted Yoongi to feel, maybe he wanted him to torture himself imagining what laid ahead. Maybe he wanted Suga to feel anxious during his trip to the US. And as days went by before their big debut at the AMAs, Yoongi thought that if that is what Lee wanted, he was definitely achieving it.

The thoughts of what awaited in Korea bugged him all the time. He had remained quiet and serious in most interviews, not only because he didn't understand much of the language, but also because his mind was somewhere else. He might not admit it, but he was scared, would the executives go as far as throwing him out of BTS? No, not now that they had reached such a level of success. But then again, they could always fabricate the lie that he had decided to leave the group. He wouldn't be the first nor the last idol to go through that.

By the time the red carpet of the AMAs came, Suga was feeling so anxious and nervous, he was sure his whole body would show it. Bang PD had talked with him already, asking for him to smile more, to talk more even if it was the few words he knew in English. Suga tried and improved for a couple of interviews, but today his nerves made him feel like he was paralyzed.

Every single one of the interviewers at the red carpet wanted to talk to them and he was tired and very shy. Namjoon took the lead in every interview and he could only nod to support whatever it was that the leader was saying. At a random interview, the lady set the mic right in front of his face. "Cmon Suga!" the members encouraged him "Saranghamnida" he answered immediately regretting what he did "He said 'I love you'" Namjoon cleared for much of the interviewer's amusement and relief. "You should've said that in English" J Hope told him as they walked away "I know" Suga replied feeling anxious once again.

He enjoyed the gala and seeing so many fans being there for them was probably the only thing that calmed him down. 'They've got your back' he kept repeating to himself as he saw the smiles, the crying eyes and the hearts ARMYs made with their hands.

When it came time for them to perform, he felt like he was about to pass out. They did their usual pre performance ritual and Namjoon eagerly added a great pep talk that he barely heard because Yoongi had only felt this nervous once, and that was when they were about to debut five years ago. The screams got louder as they approached the stage. When he noticed that he was able to hear the chants through his ear pieces, panic hit him. Maybe the pieces were turned off, maybe he would have to sing deaf without even noticing what part of the song was playing.

He felt a rush of anxiety traveling through his veins at the thought, so he moved his arm and grabbed the closest hand he could find. A firm grip and interlacing fingers received his action making Suga instantly turned to look whose hand had he kidnapped. "You'll do great, hyung" Kookie told him tightening his fingers around Suga's own. Yoongi just nodded realizing that if he could hear Kookie's voice in his head, the ear pieces were definitely working. He smiled widely as Jungkook took their interlaced hands to his lips giving Suga's back hand a little kiss."Let's show them how it's done" the younger said letting go of Yoongi's hand and standing in place ready to follow Tae's and J Hope's song introduction...

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The performance had been a huge success! Suga felt happy! Happier than what he had been during these past weeks. His smile just couldn't be erased, looking at the members only intensified his excitement. He had worked so hard and he could've never imagined he'd be where he was now. This had to be the best moment of his life.

They spent the rest of the gala talking with american celebrities, posing for photos and signing some autographs. It felt like everything he had gone through before his debut, before BTS, before this moment, was worth it.