Toxic Valentine (Kellic) - boyxboy

Chapter 17: Forget About It

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Cause I feel
Like a bad joke
Walk the tight rope
To hold on to you
Was it real?
Or a love scene,
From a bad dream
I don't think
I can forget about it

-

Kellin's POV

I take my phone out of my pocket as I close the bathroom door.

"You can just use my shower products, Kell. They're on the vanity on the left. We'll go shopping later and get you some stuff, yeah?" Vic calls and his voice makes my heart race a little faster.

"Yeah, thanks." I call back.

I don't know why I feel so guilty about this. I guess because I know it's wrong.

I turn the shower on but don't get in. I find a place on the floor and go into my contacts. I press 'call' on Calvin's number and hold the phone up to my ear. As it's ringing, I consider hanging up. Maybe this is a bad idea. But before I can make that decision, the ringing noise stops as someone answers the phone.

"Kell?" It's now been two weeks since I've heard his voice. It's taken me so long to build up the courage to do this.

"Hey." I whisper.

"Oh baby, it's good to hear your voice." He sighs.

I let a few tears slide down my cheeks and stay silent.

"How are you, princess? Are you okay?" He asks and I hear him sniff.

"Yeah, I'm okay." I swallow. "How are you?"

"Not well. I miss you, baby." he says softly.

I hesitate. This is such a bad idea.

"I miss you too." I whimper.

"It doesn't have to be like this, Kells. Just come home. We can forget this ever happened." he suggests and god it sounds tempting but I think about the promise I made Vic and how heartbroken he would be if I went back to Calvin.

"I can't, babe. I'm sorry." I choke out.

I take a breath to calm myself and it doesn't work as well as I hoped it would.

"Kellin, I swear I won't hurt you again. That was the last time." He tells me for the millionth time.

"Cal, do you know how many times you've said that? I can't trust you. I'm not safe with you." I explain painfully.

"I mean it this time! I promise! Please Kellin. I can't live without you." he cries.

I close my eyes tightly, talking myself out of giving in to him. I just care about him so much and to hear him in pain breaks my heart.

"I can't come home, Cal. I'm scared of you." I confess. "You're going to kill me one day."

He's silent for a little while before he tries to speak but he doesn't get a word out due to his voice cracking. He starts sobbing which just makes me start crying harder.

"What if I get some help? If I see someone like you said?" He suggests.

I'm a little caught off guard. He's always been so opposed to it but maybe this is what he needs to be a better person.

"Maybe." I sniff. "If you go see someone and it helps then I'll consider coming home."

"Whatever it takes, Kell. I'll change, I promise." He says.

"Okay." I whisper.

"Promise me I'll see you soon," he near pleads.

"I can't promise you anything." I tell him truthfully.