The Punk and the Princess (A Dave Grohl Fanfiction)

Ch. 32 - Why'd You Have To Go And Let it Die

"Hey honey, we picked up your suit from the cleaners" Says Virginia as you walk into Dave's house the morning of the funeral.

He doesn't say anything, he just nods in thanks and sits down on the couch, staring out the window. He'd been so uncharacteristically quiet and apathetic toward everything since you'd come into town and though you understood it, it still saddened you to see him that way.

"We're going to go pretty soon Dave." You say, crouching down next to him so you're each at face level.

"Ok" He mumbles. Only Dave and you were attending the funeral today, everyone else was staying back because Dave didn't want to bring too many guests. Since you knew Kurt and Courtney and Dave decided you would make the most sense to join him at the ceremony.

"I'm gonna go change" You whisper, kissing his cheek before you stand up and he just nods again.

Just as you finish pinning your hair back into a tight bun the guest room door creaks open and Dave comes in. He's already got on his suit pants and a button down but his tie is hanging around his neck.

"I don't know how to tie it" He says sheepishly and you wordlessly go over and begin tying the tie.

"Thank you" He says when you're done, gently touching your cheek and the gesture surprises you. He'd been so disaffectionate all weekend, not that you blamed him at all, you were just taken aback by the act.

"I love you" You whisper and he nods, letting a couple tears fall.

"I love you too" He says quietly, letting his hair fall into his face to shield you from seeing his emotional state, "I haven't said it enough but thank you for being here. I needed you this week"

"Baby I'd fly across the world for you, whenever you need me from now on, I'll make it happen. And if someone tells me I can't I'll literally beat their ass" You respond and you see a hint of a smile playing at his lips for a split second before it disappears.

"I knew there was a reason I kept you around princess" He doesn't look at you as he says it but you're almost sure he's laughing to himself as he does so. It makes you happy that at least for ten seconds of the day Dave is allowing himself to be happy. He hadn't smiled for days.

Fifteen minutes later you were sitting in the back of a town car with Pat, Shelli and Krist on your way to the church for the service. Even though you were all normally quite friendly towards one another no one was saying a word, everyone was too in their head and still in shock.

When you pull up to the memorial service you squeeze Dave's hand. He squeezes back but won't look at you, instead he just tugs at his tie.

You get out of the car and all walk together into the building, looking down so the cameras don't get any pictures of your face.

You make sure your hand is on Dave's the entire time, guiding him into the building and away from the press.

When you get inside the building you sit between Dave and Krist and go through the motions of mourning, but feel as though you're in a trance. You had never been that close with Kurt, but you liked him and you thought he liked you. You could barely process the thought of him being gone, or the effect of a loss this great.

Normally if you were really stressed about something you tried putting it in perspective, but this time it was so hard because even if you looked at things in a big picture way this still was a big picture issue. So many people depended on him, so many people loved him so much and he had such an important effect on the world, whether he knew it or not.

Krist, Shelli and Pat cry through most of the service but you and Dave sit there stoically, holding hands the entire time. You're still both too in shock to react in front of his group of people.

After the service you go up to Courtney, who's standing in the front with Frances, her bandmate Eric Erlandson, and Kurt's mom.

You go in to hug her but you can tell almost immediately that she isn't there, not really anyway. She has to be on at least ten different medications because she seems even more out of it than usual.

"What can I do?" You whisper to Eric as Courtney mindlessly collects more flowers from other guests.

"Come back to the house for a bit, we need someone sane there" He says and you bite your lip and look back at Dave.

"Right away Er?" You ask and he nods seriously. You can tell how concerned he is.

"It will be a mess Jules. She's on so much shit right now she's practically sedated but pretty soon she's gonna come to and just frankly not be ok. She needs you—an actual adult—at least for a bit. Just talk to her" He says.

"Give me five minutes" You sigh before going back over to Dave.

"Hey baby" You say when you reach him, "I hate to do this but Eric asked me to go over to the house and help with taking care of Courtney, do you mind if I head over there for a few hours? I totally understand if you want me to stay with you, you're my first priority right now Dave"

"No go ahead" He says in a hoarse tone, "Jim and my mom and Lisa are at my house anyway. I'll see you in a bit" He says, kissing your cheek gently.

"I'm gonna call a cab, take the car back with Krist ok" You whisper, feeling a tightening in your throat and you feel yourself start to cry at the thought of him heading back to his house without you.

"Are you sure you don't want me to go back with you?" You ask and he nods.

"I think Courtney needs you right now and as much as I don't want to see her, I know she can use your presence, a voice of reason" He says, cracking a smile.

You kiss him gently and walk back over to Eric. Ten minutes later you're in the back of Eric's car with Courtney. Almost immediately after entering the car she leans her head against the headrest and lights a cigarette.

When you get to the house the outside is buzzing with media, all around the front entrance. You put your head down and say a silent prayer that Annie wasn't among those outside. The thought of any of these people trying to see inside the pain Courtney was going through was disgusting to you.

"Alright we're here" Eric says as he pulls through the gate and parks in the driveway behind half a dozen other cars.

When you get into the house you are shocked to see probably twenty people just standing in the dining room area, even more throughout the house. You recognized some, Courtney's other band mate Patty Schemel, Frances' nanny Jackie, her best friends Jennifer and Kat—but a lot of them you didn't recognize. You knew it wasn't your place but you felt like Courtney and Frances needed space, only those who were closest or most trusted should be with her.

Eric seemed to be on the same page as you, "Holy shit" He murmurs under his breath as you walk through the door.

Courtney on the other hand doesn't seem to care at all, she's barely even standing. At one point she drops her still burning cigarette onto the wood floor and about ten people rush over to put it out before she sets the house on fire.

"I'm going to get her to bed" You whisper to Eric and he nods in agreement.

Somehow you manage to get Courtney up the stairs and into her private bedroom without anyone following you up. Just as you're helping her into bed she whispers the first words you'd heard from her since her short speech at the service.

"Whatever you fucking do, hold on to those you love, because you never know when you won't have a fucking chance to again. You'll never know when he'll stop caring enough to love you back" She says, before closing her eyes.

You think she's fallen asleep until you hear a soft moan escape her lips and you realize she's crying.

"Courtney" You respond in a sympathetic whisper, pushing her hair behind her ears, "He loved you so much" You add in an even quieter tone but she doesn't respond.

She keeps crying until the numbness seems to return to her features and you keep sitting with her until the sun does down on Seattle and one of the worst days of your life slowly draws to a close.