forever and always | bang chan

six

It's been months since I got discharged from the hospital. Since that day, they've been acting weird.

When I say they're acting weird, I mean they're taking extra care of me even if I told them a million times that I'm okay.

These past few months, Bambam was with me and he goes to check on me in between schedules even if it is a long drive. To be honest, I'm scared that my feelings grew deeper for him and I get too attached since he's always with me.

He's in Japan right now and it's been two weeks already, I miss him so much. He doesn't reply to my texts, and I can't call him but I totally understand that I am in a relationship with an idol. 

Yes, we're official. I was thinking twice before, I worry about the conflicts in this relationship because I'm no one but just simple lady. What if I ruin his career? I put all my thoughts away and focused on what we feel for each other. 

I looked at the side table of my bed to get the framed photo of us taken at a photo booth. I smiled as I see his arms wrapped around me and laughed at my shocked face when he suddenly kissed me.

I miss him so much already.

I called Chan, whose been extremely busy these days. His excuse was upcoming debut, but his members told me that he's been too preoccupied lately.

"Please answer..." I whispered when I hear the other line ring.

[ Annyeong haseyo. ] Chan said on the other line.

[ Channieee~ let's meet please? ] I pleaded.

[ But I--] he started but I cut him off.

[ No more excuses! Can you hang over? Mom wouldn't let me go out. ]

I heard him sigh. [ Arasseo, see you. ] 

YAY! [ Ne, see you! Thanks, you're the best! Saranghae Bang Chan!!! ]

Before he could even respond, I ended the call.

Finally! Ever since I was discharged, I didn't get the chance to go out alone, only if I was with Chan or Bambam. But these days, neither were present, so I'm bored to death.

I actually tried reaching out to call my friends but they were all busy with their personal lives.

As I was waiting for Chan, I took a quick shower. When I finished, he still wasn't there so I watched some of the Stray Kids survival show over again but even after 5th episode, he still isn't here.

I waited for hours, and hours. Then, I saw Chan's text.

Byungchannie: Sorry, can't come. Something came up.

Me: Oh, okay. I understand, take care!

What a sad life. Why are the boys in my life idols? Enlighten me please.

I just wanted to spend time with Chan, he's been to busy it's not normal anymore.

I felt my stomach, and I didn't notice that it's night time already and I haven't eaten my dinner yet.

"Oh, you're gonna eat already? Chan isn't here yet." my mom said as she saw me walk in to the kitchen.

"He isn't coming, eomma. Have you eaten already?" I said and sat on the bar stools of the island kitchen as my mom serves me food.

I was so hungry that the plate got clean in a few minutes.

"Ahh.." I made a sound as I got satisfied.

"Kamsahamnida! I'll go up now." I said and gave my mom a peck on the cheek.

When I entered my room, Bambam's standee was the first thing I saw.

Neomu bogoshippo...

I opened my fan accounts, and saw that they won an award.

"Waaah!" I screamed, that's my boys!

I'm so proud of them, oh my god. As I was celebrating, I opened a video of their speech but it made me miss him even more.

When is he going back to me? I can't take this, it seems like I can't go on without him. This is creeping me out.

"What did you do to make me miss you like this, Kunpimook Bhuwakul?!" I said frustrated at his standee.

I heard the door creaked open, "I told you not to talk to a standee, it makes you look like you're crazy." a voice said as Bambam showed up."

Oh. my. god.

His smile flashed, "Happy Valentine's Day, Abby." and with that, I hugged him.

My tears were streaming down my face as he hugged me back. It felt so surreal, now that I am with him. "Why are you crying? Aren't you happy that I'm here?"

I hit him in the chest, "I hate you! I missed you so much." I said and hugged him again.

"I thought you'll like my surprise though," he said and I kissed him. "I am. Happy Valentine's Day, my Bambam."

He was still in his makeup and his hair was still up, exposing his forehead. "I think letting your hair up suits you best." I suggested.

Really, it enhanced his handsome face even more.

"Really?" and I nodded. I know some other Ahgase who likes that hairstyle too. 

Then, even this late at night, he asked me out on a date.

He was driving but I had no idea where we were going. I was asking and asking but he still wouldn't spill it.

The engine stopped, it seems like we were in a hill overlooking the city lights.

"Woah!" I gasped at the amazing view in front of me. 

Bambam opened the trunk of his car, exposing a comfy mattress and pillows where we can lay down. There was also a basket of food and drinks. 

This was my dream date, and it's happening with my dream guy.

He assisted me as I climbed up the trunk. I looked at the city lights, it was wonderful.

"It's really nice to see things in a different point of view sometime." He said, while also admiring the lights.

I felt his arm snake around mine and I felt his chin on my shoulder.

"I missed you. I'm sorry I couldn't go to you right away." he said. I smiled at him, "Don't be sorry, I know you went all the way from the awards to my place."

His eyes widened, "How'd you know?"

"Well, you're still wearing your outfit." and we both laughed when he realized it.

The whole night, we just ate and catched up for the days we weren't together. I learned that they're here already since last week but he couldn't sneak out to go to me because of the fans around him.

"It's not that I am not proud of you, I just don't want anyone throwing you negative things." he explained but I understand completely.

I heard him play the song 4419, the song Chan made for him. Oh, how I love that song! Actually, I was the one who listened to the song first, and I liked it immediately. 

Bambam smiled. Maybe reminiscing about their memories. They're really good friends. Actually, there was a time Chan was really tired but he couldn't really show it to his members. Bambam then showed up and it really made Chan happy. Their smiles in that episode keeps me alive.

Bambam and I cuddled and laughed at the little things, not minding our surroundings. It's just me and him. That's all I could ever ask for.

When it was time to go, we packed up and closed the trunk.

I was about to go inside, but there was suddenly a flash of a camera.