Michael's POV (listen to Amnesia RIGHT NOW)
"Michael, you need to stop moping around." Ashton said for like the 200th time since she left me. How was I not supposed to mope.
I grunted and looked down at my phone, I wanted to call her. I needed to call her, but I was scared. We hadn't officially ended things, and that was the only thing keeping me going at this point. I was scared that if I called her, she would end us. I had fucked up while we were in England. I was out all the time, while she was sitting all alone, every day for a whole month. I hadn't even realized it, and when she pointed it out I felt like the world's number one douche bag.
"Seriously, get up we're going to Luke's." Ashton said trying to drag me off of his couch.
It was pathetic how I ended up at his house, I physically could not move myself because I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach repeatedly. Ashton had to pick my pathetic sobbing ass up and help me get out of the airport. I had been laying on his couch since then, drowning in my sadness. I still felt like I couldn't breathe properly. She had seen me on my knees begging her to stay or forgive me, but she left without saying anything. I had fucked up so horribly that she didn't care anymore.
Ashton shook me out of my thoughts, and I grunted again. I decided to get up so Ash wouldn't keep bothering me.
"Finally." He sighed, and grabbed his car keys. "Let's go."
I followed him to the car, without saying a word, and got into the passenger seat. I probably looked like an absolute mess, dried tears stained my cheeks and my hair was all out of place from me nearly ripping it out. God, I felt like wimp. Ashton didn't really say anything during the ride, he was probably more upset about her leaving than I was. Ash turned on the radio to break the silence, and I wanted to jump out of the car because Ash had an All Time Low CD in and the song that was playing was If These Sheets Were the States. I waited for Ashton to skip it, but instead he hummed along to it. Sure it sounded upbeat and everything, but when the love of your fucking life is half way around the globe the shit got to me.
I got out of Ashton's car as soon as it had stopped in front of Luke's house. I let out a sigh of relief, at least I didn't start crying again. I walked into Luke's, him and Cal were in the living room watching soccer (a/n: just learned that Australians call it soccer I thought it was only Americans). I joined them and they both gave me apologetic looks.
"I don't want a pity party." I muttered.
They both nodded, and went back to watching the game. Ashton walked in and sat next to Calum on the other end of the couch. Luke whispered something, and Ashton smiled sadly and nodded. I furrowed my eye brows.
"What are you talking about?" I asked. If they wanted to talk about something, they should talk loud enough for everyone to hear.
"Nothing." Luke said and coughed.
I rolled my eyes, "If it's about her I don't mind, you don't have to whisper." I said quickly.
"I called her a while ago." Luke finally said.
"Is she okay?" I asked looking down at my feet.
"Yeah she's good." Luke answered timidly.
She must think I'm such a coward. Luke called her, and I didn't. I got up from the couch and made my way to Luke's kitchen. I was pacing around, I was literally going to go crazy without her. I ran my hands over my face, I needed a drink. I looked in the fridge, and found a pack of beer. Any other day, I wouldn't dare drink in Luke's house for a fear of Liz yelling at me for it. But today I couldn't be bothered. I popped the cap off and walked back into the living room. Calum looked like he was going to say something, but decided against it. I tipped my head back and drank the bitter shit in the bottle. After a couple more, I'd forget all about the taste.
I'd made a nice collection of beer bottles on the living room floor. I had lost count at ten, and that was a while ago. The boys were deathly silent.
"Mike, maybe you should stop after this one." Ashton said.
"I'm fine, Ashton." I really felt fine. The pit in my stomach that I had felt earlier when she left, felt all warm and fuzzy because of the alcohol. I could deal with this, I couldn't handle the emptiness I felt because she wasn't here. I chugged the rest of the liquid in the bottle in my hand, and put it on the floor with the rest. I was about to get up, but Luke gripped my shoulder. I tried to shrug him off but his grip tightened. I sighed and turned to face him.
"Stop. You can't lean on alcohol as a crutch every time she leaves you. " Luke said harshly.
He was probably right, but there was nothing else I could do. I didn't want to feel the empty feeling in my stomach, and the only way to get rid of it was with alcohol. I was thinking like an alcoholic. I wouldn't let myself end up like that.
"I'm not, I just wanted a few drinks." I lied.
"A few? This is a few to you?" Luke asked, motioning to the many bottles surrounding my feet.
"You don't get it." I lowered my voice.
"Then make me get it, Mike we're here for you. We're all dealing with this. She's gone, we're upset. We know you're more upset than us. Just talk to us." Luke sighed.
"I don't want to talk about it." I paused, "It hurts too much. She's half way across the world and I'm here. I can't even find the courage to fucking pick up the phone and call her. I can't breathe, Luke. It's this stupid suffocating feeling. She fucking took pieces of me with her when she left. I just-" My voice cracked, and I looked away from my friends. "I love her. I've never fucking felt this way before. I don't know how to handle this shit." I finished quietly.
"I know." Ashton murmured.
I blinked back the tears in my eyes, "Can we stop talking about this I feel like a chick." I chuckled.
Calum giggled a bit and Ash and Luke nodded their heads.
"Will you help me get rid of these?" I asked, picking up a few beer bottles.
"We all have to pitch in because there's so many." Ash laughed.
"Shut up, there's not even that many." I defended.
"There's like twenty here." Calum said picking a few up.
Oops?
Author's Note
Emotional Michael, hope you enjoyed. This is kind of short, but I wanted to write something so yeah. I'm so sad Michael couldn't even say Kelsey's name sos.
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Always Second Best// m.c
Fanfiction"Kelsey?" He took my hands in his. I couldn't look at him, it was too much. He shouldn't be here. I took in his physical state, his eyes were bloodshot and glassy, and the bags under his eyes were deep purple. His nose was red and he sniffled freque...
