Let You Go ||Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader||

Chapter 5

     You felt your stomach drop in the span of a second. Terushima looked at you wearily, before back at Kuroo, who walked out the door, shoving his hands into his pockets. You gulped, before Yuuji elbowed you. "(f/n), go. We both know you need to."
You sighed before checking the time, "Class starts in 3 minutes, but he'll be there." You said softly. Terushima nodded his head, before placing a kiss on your forehead. "Good luck cutie, call me if you need anything."
To your dismay, he wasn't there. He didn't show up the entire class. When the professor asked you if you knew where he was, you shook your head, although the voice in your head was telling you it was because of you.
Once you walked out the doors of the room, you knew where he was. First he was going to go to his apartment and wait until it started getting dark, then he was going to go drive to his mountain. In high school he would always do the same thing whenever he was in a fight with his girlfriend or with a friend. He would go there to sit and think. Think about what he was going to do, and that was one of the only times he would ever loose the cool facade he put on to hide his inner turmoil.
You felt bad trespassing his sacred land where he would go to sit and think, but he had often invited you to join him so you could just sit and escape the world together for a little bit of time.
You dropped by his apartment and much to your prediction, his presence was absent and so was his car. So you drove as the sun began setting, following the old road up to a mountain that was discreet.
Your car rolled up the mountainside before you stopped close at the top, seeing his area further up the slope. Throughout the drive you had been battling with yourself what to say. You told yourself you did like Kuroo, and you felt nothing. You then told yourself you didn't like Kuroo, but by the ache in your chest, your conscious knew you were lying to yourself.
You bit your lip, you liked him, you always had. It was easier to stomach your feelings than act on them because after the first time, you didn't want to hurt anymore, especially since he was the one who caused it. You hated how he always seemed to have your heart, and when you broke up with your boyfriend for college, you felt different but you didn't know why. Now you did, because you still had feelings for Kuroo that had never disappeared.
He was so easy to love yet you didn't want to think of him in that way, but you couldn't help yourself. The way he acted like an old man reprimanding you for little mistakes or comments, or to the way he acted like a ten year old when he was with you, trying to make you laugh. No matter how hard he tried to act cool and smooth, he was a big nerd with cheesy science pick up lines and birthday cards. The dork slept with two pillows smashed against his head so he could block out all noise and sleep comfortably. He would try to provoke you to get a reaction out to amuse himself. You had never felt so conflicted before.
Why did you even drive up this mountain? It definitely wasn't to reject him a second time. You groaned, before turning off the car and walking up the mountain that followed up the pavement to a dirt road that veered off. You followed the road, until it led you to the area where Kuroo's car was parked. But, to your surprise, there was two cars sitting along the pathway, right beside each other.
You stopped, feeling your heart drop at the sight. There he was, Kuroo's bedhead, with a girl, too familiar for your liking standing beside him.
"I think I heard a car." Kuroo said, sounding slightly annoyed, you froze in spot. It wasn't completely dark out yet, so your figure as well as face was easily recognizable in the dimming light.
"Really? I didn't hear anything." The person beside him said, she was the same girl from the party, the one that made you cringe on sight. She took one of his hands and laced it with her own, which he seemed oddly stiff to her touch.
"No, that was definitely a car engine." The male turned around, amber eyes landing on you. Kuroo looked absolutely breathless, and shocked.

Not this game again. Everything would have been easier if he hadn't let you go in the first place, but he did and there was no changing that now. You both did things out of hurt. Kuroo as well as you knew within the moment that when you tried to say or do something to fix the hurt, it only made the cut bigger. In the fraction of the second that your eyes locked, you both knew the only way to heal the hurt was each other.
Now it was only a matter of the heart. You had to find it in yourself to take the possibility of being hurt again. While Kuroo realized his greatest mistake was letting you go, he now had to decide whether you were worth holding onto, or letting go of permanently.

"I don't get it," you said, looking at him, with your stomach weighing you down, " If you want me so badly now, why'd you let me go in the first place? Was I not enough for you in the beginning? What changed?"

"(f/n)...." He began softly and seriously, as you felt your heart sink to the floor.