Gyve

Chapter 16

Hoseok walked through the corridors of the hotel aimlessly past midnight.

The dinner and dance really had tired him out physically and emotionally as well, something Hoseok was really not used to. As he wandered about his mind could only think about what he overheard Y/n tell Yoongi during the dance.

Maybe they have too many of their own devils to fight so they have no time for love? Or they have a past that already has someone so there is no room left for another? Or they are running......They could be running hard and fast away from something, and I can't keep up so I am left behind?

Those were the reasons she said she was afraid to love. And somehow it was everything Hoseok was. He was a man still fighting his devils, a man who would never cease to run. After hearing what she said Hoseok could not bring himself to accept it anymore....he couldn't accept he was starting to like her, that he was starting to look at her differently, a way he never looked at other women. He couldn't accept anymore that over time, the more he saw her the more he wanted to do more than just sleep with her. He wanted to watch the stars with her, dangle his legs in the swimming pool and listen to her talk all night, he wanted to hold her hand and walk down the alleys, he wanted to do so much. He even spent hours imagining it. Imagining taking her out on a date, maybe eventually falling in love with her, having a life with her, a family perhaps? Hoseok had gone really far with his dreaming, all these things were only possible in an alternative reality. A universe where he wasn't guilty of what he did, a universe where he wasn't punishing himself for himself by not allowing himself to fall in love.

Hoseok wasn't worthy of her. He would never allow himself to love her. And she was right. He was the kind of man who would break her in love. He had to stop it all, stop his own feelings, stop hers from even starting in the first place. Which was why he said all that. Why he said it didn't matter when the truth was that it mattered more than anything. With her harboring no such feelings for him while Hoseok did feel relieved, he felt hurt as well. But maybe that was for the better, maybe everything that happened today was for the better. At least now he was talking to her, now they were laughing together as well. If he couldn't make you his he could at least be with you while he could.

And it was occupied in thoughts like this that made him walk all night.

Hoseok walked into the empty dining hall eyes fixed on the gorgeous piece of art which was alone illuminated under the spotlight in the otherwise dark room. Walking around the piano, feeling the wood run against the material of his pant, he sat down on the stool, letting his fingers graze the black and white keys, their touch foreign yet so comforting. The piano for him was like that old friend who even years later was waiting to listen to the stories he had to tell. He had so much to say today. So much he wanted to let out. Hoseok pressed a key, the sound pleasantly echoing against the velvet lined walls, the vibrations of the string evident under his finger. As his other hand placed itself on the piano ready to run along the keys, his heart somehow felt uneasy. As though playing the piano today might change things. What things and how he didn't know. He just felt things would not be the same after this.

But the bulky yet delicate piece was calling out to him so he gave in, letting his fingers form a melody that filled the room, it's soothing sounds like a liquor for his aching soul. Music was never something superfluous to Hoseok, it was a medicine delivered in the most divine way.

And he was only just beginning to get lost in it when he raised his head to see a certain somebody far away, leaning against the door. Her eyes closed and her arms crossed, she was engrossed in the song, her fingers tapping against her elbow, matching the rhythm perfectly. Her hair was open, falling over her shoulders, not so gratefully yet it looked so alluring.