Dark Night

And the rest

The next day I had coffee with Keshondra. Our spring breaks didn't coincide, so we were still restricted to weekends. Like me, she was getting a lot out of classes even if she felt overwhelmed sometimes, and I thought that the length of semesters might make it easier for that to happen. Quarters seemed to cut me off right when feelings of inadequacy and incompetence threatened to overwhelm me. She was going back to Duke's Crossing for the summer, working retail and we were both simultaneously dreading it and welcoming it.

"Independence is great, and it's going to be curtailed some when I go back to my family," she said. "But at the same time, it's family and I can't wait to see them again." I nodded.

"I miss my Grandpa and the kitties a lot. Even Stan, which is kind of a surprise." She nodded. "But I think maybe next summer I'll take the summer quarter if there are classes I want to take. Either get a bit of a jump on requirements--and there are a lot of them before I can really get into my major--or take classes that will help me be better rounded."

"You're such an overachiever, sweetie," she said, making me smile.

"I don't have the same home life as you do, and Grandpa is always urging me to take advantage of every opportunity. I mean, I know that I can go back to the nest any time I want, but he really wants me to fly. I dunno, though. That's a whole other year in the future, and right now I'm kind of looking forward to going back and let my brain relax." She laughed.

"So how's John? Is he doing any better?" she asked. And because she knew John and was also his friend, I told her about our skating and what it meant to him, the progress he was making in therapy. And our conversation. "He really said that he's not asking for forever--yet?" she asked, fanning herself. "Wow. That boy has hidden depths. My mom will be thrilled that you listened," she teased me. "She thinks I never do."

"It was good advice," I said. "I feel more secure now. I can go and have experiences and grow, and I'd say that the odds are pretty good that John and I will at least try a more mature relationship down the road. But that's also kind of risky because I don't know what I'd do without his friendship. I honestly don't know if it can survive if the romantic aspect goes boom."

"Life is risk, Delia, all you can do is your best," she said logically. And then we talked about her new boyfriend. She'd met him in a psych class she was taking for general studies and they clicked really well.

"Bring him to coffee next time," I ordered her, and she smiled. After a couple hours and a few coffees, she had to get back to her studies and I decided to check out the Getty. I'd never been, and after all the fun of the week, I felt the need to do something improving. It was the best museum I'd ever been to and I knew I'd be coming back a lot. There was so much to see, and I bet I could go often and see new things each time, even revisiting parts of the collection I'd seen. I went back to campus after dinner, and Serafina had an invitation to an off-campus party, which would be the first one that I'd been to.

After we talked about what we'd done that day, we prettied up and set off. I went into the house first and reported that she should stay outside since I'd seen some people smoking out in the kitchen. Fortunately, the yard of the house was big and the keg was in the back yard. There was music, not terribly loud, and a good number of people. I got asked out a few times and asked out a cute sophomore. Finally, having had a little too much to drink (not hard, I wasn't much of a drinker), we went back to our room and I guzzled a big bottle of water before going to bed.

The next morning I woke up with just a trace of a headache, which was good. Both Serafina and I had dates for that night; she'd met a handsome freshman double majoring in political science and Chicano studies who also wanted to go to law school. I'd met him briefly; he was intense but nice. My date was the guy I'd asked out, as sophomore in computer science It was fun to get ready for the date, and Serafina, examining her hair and makeup carefully in the mirror, grinned. "We are just too fine to be sitting in at home on a Saturday night."