My Guardian, Phil // P.L

Part 12

Phil sits next to me and begins to eat his bun too and life, for a moment, is pure bliss.

Later that night, as Phil and I sit on the couch watching Doctor Who, a strange noise resonates throughout the room. My stomach. It growls loudly and Phil and I burst into laughter at the sudden, strange noise.

"Pizza?" I finally ask when I'm finished laughing.

"Pizza." Phil confirms.

I pick up my phone and call up the pizza place, ordering a pizza with no pineapple, you know, the good kind. After the person on the other end tells me that it should be here in about fifteen to twenty minutes, Phil and I begin to wait in anticipation for the delicious goods.

"What should we do while we wait?" Phil asks. Before my stomach interrupted us, we had just finished the second season of Doctor Who and so Phil and I are a bit Doctor Who'd out.

"Let's play a game," I say in that creepy jigsaw voice from that one horror movie.

"What kind of game?"

I open my phone again and click on an app.

Phil peeks over to see what app I clicked on and looks back up at me. "Fruit ninja? You still play fruit ninja?" He laughs.

"Hey you won't be laughing when I beat your ass!" I say with a smirk as I click 'multiplayer'.

Phil raises an eyebrow as if to say "Oh really?" And he turns in his seat so we are now facing each other.

If you don't know what fruit ninja is (which, let's be honest, you probably know what it is) it's a game which you slice fruit and avoid the bombs. Multiplayer is a split screen mode where you go against a friend. It's fun but competitive at times.

A melon flies up onto the screens and we both slice it in unison, our hands moving at the speed of light. Then, a banana. Then, another melon. Then three apples. More and more fruit floats up onto the screen and we both slice faster and faster until a bomb floats up and Phil, in his frenzy, slices it. It starts glowing, letting of beams of light and then, BOOM. Game over for poor Philly.

"SHHHHHUSH!" Phil stressfully states. "I didn't mean to do that."

"Well no, I'm sat here thinking 'he meant to do that' aren't I?" I sarcastically laugh.

Phil pouts, sticking out his bottom lip and looks at me with a grumpy expression. "Shush you." He says in the same manner as an angry toddler.

"Again?" I ask, deciding it would be okay to give him another chance. Phil nods.

We play a few more games, the wins pretty evenly split between the both of us until eventually, we get bored of playing fruit ninja. I look at the time displayed on my phone and sigh. "It's only been ten minutes."

"What else can we do?" Phil asks.

I ponder for a minute. Then, I'm hit by a sudden memory.

Back when I had a dream, at times like these, I would go upstairs into that room and play until I'm wondering where the time went. I look at Phil and think for a minute before finally deciding what to do.

"Follow me," I say as I stand up. Phil gets up and follows me as I walk upstairs at a steady pace.

We stand in front of the door and I let out a shaky sigh as I reach out and turn the handle slowly and falteringly. The old door opens with a loud creak and dust dances about instantly at the sudden disturbance in the air.

I step inside and flick the light on. There she is. My piano. It is black and glossy, though a thin layer of dust has collected over the surface. Usually, it was a happy piano. It used to be played a lot back when I wanted to be a musician. But now this piano was melancholy and lonely. 

Phil gasps but then instantly coughs on all the dust.

"Can you play?" Phil asks.

I slowly walk over to the piano and run my fingers over the dusty lid. I remember the day I gave up.

I sat on the stool, trying to play a song, but nerves getting the better of me. I had recently been to the doctors for a fertility test. I and my partner at the time had been trying for a baby but to no avail. So I went to the doctors to try and get to the root of the problem.

My phone rang, buzzing as it sat on the lid of the piano. I answered it with shaky hands and it was then that I was told that I was forever infertile. That I could not become pregnant nor maintain a pregnancy.

My partner left me shortly after. And from that day, I abandoned that dream along with my other.

"I can play..." I say slowly.

Hesitantly, I sit down on the stool and dust flies up into the air. I lift up the lid and the gleaming keys of the piano shine as if they're new. Phil approaches and stands next to me as I place my shaky hands on the keys. I take a deep breath and begin to play a melody.

As soon as the first note rings out, I once again fall in love with music and close my eyes as I continue the harmonious tune.

When I'm done, Phil looks at me with wonder. "I had no idea you could play the piano!" He said. "That was amazing!"

I open my eyes slowly, a tear falling down my face. A tear filled with love for music, for the piano. A tear filled with regret for giving up on this gift. A tear filled with a dream which slowly begins to burn within me again.

I smile up at Phil. "It's been a while."

As the room goes quiet, a small, almost silent knock comes from downstairs. But we know what it is.

"Pizza!" Phil and I both cheer in unison and we both leap up and jog downstairs then to the door. Phil and I both reach for the handle and open the door together. The pizza boy looks at us with an unamused expression, chewing his gum at a steady pace.

"That's £9.99 please." He says in a monotone murmur.

Phil reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a ten pound note, handing it to the boy. "Keep the change." He says with a smile.

"Such generosity." The boy says sarcastically with an eye roll as he hands the box over to me.

The boy begins to walk away and Phil and I exchange glances before shutting the door.

I turn around and see that Phil has already rushed off and I walk into the living room to see him sat crossed legged on the couch, looking at me excitedly.

"I've never known someone to get so excited over pizza." I chuckle as I walk over to Phil and perch next to him and I sink into the sofa.

"You have now," Phil says, practically drooling everywhere as he opens up the box and the hypnotising smell of pizza wafts through the air and into our noses. He takes out a slice and chomps down on it, letting out a small moan in delight.

"I don't get it," I say as I get a piece for myself. "You can't feel pain in heaven but you have other senses? Like taste?"

Phil nods and puts his hand over his mouth as to not spray pizza everywhere when he talks. "Heaven is a great place. The nasty things like pain and illness are gone but the nice things like taste and touch are there."

"If I die, do I go to heaven?" I ask before taking a bite out of my own slice.

"I'm afraid I don't know," Phil says. "But the only part of heaven I've seen is where the angels are. My part of heaven. Though there are other sectors, we're not allowed out of our own."

"What happens when... an angel dies?" I ask slowly, hoping that this isn't too personal.

"Nothing. They just cease to exist. We are created to serve a purpose. To protect you. But when we die, we can't do that so we just don't exist. There's no reason to."

I swallow my pizza. "Yikes," I say. "Aren't you scared of dying?"

"Aren't you?"

"I'm terrified."