*Jasons pov.*
I couldn't seem to make it up to Carter. It felt like I was walking on thin ice around her. After her fit yesterday, she went to sleep and has been sleep ever since.
Me and smoke were now just sitting in silence as I tried to think of how I could make this any better. Lord knows I don't want her to leave.
"You think if I told her what I do she'll understand?" I asked Smoke.
"Might help ha see where ya comin from, but she still not gone like ya ass." He said. I heard shuffling from upstairs so I knew she was up, here we go again.
"Aight Smoke, you gotta go, you gone upset her and I'm tryna fix dis." I said standing up and preparing myself to go up there.
"She always upset with or without me. Y'all the most bipolar people I eva seen. But I'll leave, cause I heard mama cookin up a storm, and I wasn't tryna miss it fa y'all in love asses anyways." He said then continued. "Nobody told yo ass to go get a girl, so whatever happens remember it's yo fault." He finished then began to chuckle.
"Get ya ass out man." I said making my way up the stairs. "Carter," I said softly as I knocked on the door. I pushed it open to see her on her phone. I know she ain't doing nothing on her phone, cause she don't have any friends. "Baby I gotta tell you something I been hiding." I said.
She looked at me with tears in her eyes.
"I'm a drug dealer, well, more than that, I own a gang that deals pounds of marijuana, cocaine, ecstasy, guns and all that you can think of, I didn't wanna tell you cause I didn't wanna corrupt you into the lifestyle. You're my sanity right now."
She looked shook for a second. She just sat there frozen.
"That's why I had to leave for two days, and I couldn't tell you anything about it, someone tried to stop a shipment of guns I had coming into the U.S." I finished.
"So all the times you had to randomly leave for hours at a time you would do what?" She asked looking anywhere but me.
"Sometimes I had to eliminate someone, maybe recount the money we were supposed to make or to make plans on the next moves, trust me I'm not as bad as I wa-,"
"My apartments ready, I'm leaving tomorrow." She cut me off. Does it not matter that I'm here begging her to look past me leaving. And what did she mean when she said I was just like them, a while back.
"Carter, you're not listening, I'm not as bad as I used to, the streets used to be my everything, but recently you been keeping me away from that and i know that without you imma go right back, don't leave. Your life is not in danger I promise you that." I pleaded. She walked around the room and gathered what she had.
"I m not leaving you, I'm leaving this house, I need some time and space." She whispered, still gathering her stuff.
My blood boiled when she said time and space, everyone knows that's the white way of breaking up, she might as well say, it's not you it's me. "No Carter! My goal is to give you whatever you want because I wanna keep you happy but I can't give you that, if you move out, I'm moving in with you! And we're gonna talk! Tell me your fears and lemme answer ya questions, don't fucking push me away." I finished. All this time I realized that I've been doing most of the talking. CC is quiet but I'm waiting for the day she explodes.
She made her way to where her few shoes were and everytime she packed a pair, I would unpack it. She kept her composure for a long time before she took a deep breath and tried one more time. I unpacked the shoe once more and observed her reaction.
"Jason, stop, please."
"No, talk to me bruh, I'm sorry, why you making this a big deal-,"
"BECAUSE!" She yelled cutting me off. "I WAS ALONE! You left and I didn't like the way I felt, I needed you around me, I have become way too attached to you, and it made me realize that if you ever left me, I would be so heartbroken and helpless and I don't like that feeling, cause I know no one ever sticks around like the day they will, so ju- please, give me some time." She finished and at this point I realized that she was just scared, she wasn't mad at me, she didn't care about my dangerous job that I always sneak off to. She was just scared of the feelings that she's developed, the feeling that I had about her since the first month we've been talking.
"Carter, baby, listen," I started off gently. "With what you just said I can never let you go cause I feel the same way about you, and I know I may come off rude or aggressive sometimes but I don't ever want you to think I would leave you, I've become so addicted to you, you bring the peace in my fast paced life, you slow me down so I can enjoy the little things and I love that! These past 3 months with you have been heaven and I can't let you leave because without you and our 3 kids, I could never be this calm and rational as I've been lately, so please don't do this baby," I finished. I hope all of that didn't go through one ear and out the other cause you will never catch me saying that sappy lovey doves shit again.
"You promise, you'll never leave?" She said like a little kid, looking up at me through her short curly lashes.
"I promise baby girl, it's you and me forever." I said meeting her pinky finger with mine.
We were both now sitting on the bed and she moved to straddle me then placed a light kiss on my lips.
"Make love to me J."
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A/n:
Ummmm, don't kill me this was long overdue ikkkkk, but aye thanks for all the votes and comments!!! Comment below lemme know how you fell about this chapter! And lemme know how much you hate me for taking so long 💀💀 I love you heathens ❤️
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