Yours Truly

February 12, 1996

Dear Villain's,

Why are you guys so angsty? Why are you all sooo desperate for ultimate power and world domination?

I guess it's a cool concept and all, but I still don't understand. Why would anyone want to hurt another person for personal conquest?

I'll admit, I sometimes do it when I joke and things and act like a selfish butt human. You know, like when I talk to Uncle and sass him and stuff. But I only say it because it's true.

But there I go again getting off topic.

I ask those questions to you villain peeps because I was training with Wiz and then he stopped me mid push up and got all deep and weird. He got his signature, glassy look on his face. It was like he was sad or something.

He sat me down and started explaining about how I wasn't the first person he tried to train for good. Apparently there was another guy before me. He said his name was Teth-Adam.

I laughed because it sounded like Wiz said the name of one of those medicines you see in commercials for heart disease.

Wiz smiled for the first time I've ever been with him. I think I did that.

He sighed, gave a cough and then continued to explain.

He said that Teth-Adam was like me. He was courageous, kind, thoughtful, and a loyal protector of his country and homeland. Apparently this was 5,000 years ago so pillaging and stealing was common.

But Wiz said that Teth wasn't like the other villagers and that he was a spark of hope in the war and darkness of dictators and rulers who abused their powers.

When Wiz gave Teth his powers, it was so he could protect his country and defeat the evil rulers by using might from old Egyptian gods.

Wiz said that he was the best fighter he had ever seen and that he was amazing and all of the good that Wiz had ever hoped for.

But then Teth-Adam became selfish, and as he grew in power and he began to use his abilities to control his country just like the old rulers used to do.

Wiz said that he saw how powerful Teth was becoming and feared what Teth would become.

So he banished him.

But now Wiz fears that he's coming back because he senses something wrong with the energy balance in the universe or something. Wiz thinks he's coming back.

Wiz said that I had to train harder than ever to be ready for him. For the evil villain named, Black Adam.

I thought it was all great. Just peachy.

I haven't even fought a bad guy and I now have an archnemesis that has a wicked name.

Villains suck.